Chapter 4

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      You were utterly exhausted, as you started your car and peeled out of the garage. Your only thought to get as far away from there as you could. Surprised and thankful that Loki didn't just teleport himself to your car in his efforts to stop you. Every time you heard him screaming your name to stop, it was like a knife to your heart. The image of him literally balls deep in some whore he found was all you kept playing through your mind. You found yourself repeating the phrase "Not him too" over and over again like you lost your mind. Maybe you have, maybe this was the ultimate crack you needed to achieve to finally lose it all. 

    You try your best to push your rapidly deteriorating thoughts out of your head and try to focus on where it is you are going exactly

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    You try your best to push your rapidly deteriorating thoughts out of your head and try to focus on where it is you are going exactly. You think of the only place you have, that you haven’t shared the knowledge of its location with Loki yet. Your grandmother’s cabin. You haven’t been there since she passed 5 years ago. The memories were too hard to deal with at the time.

      You had once thought to bring Loki there with you. Hoping that with him by your side you could find the strength to enjoy being there again and smile at the memories it holds instead of crying. Now it seems the place is truly set to be a destination for your tears. Suddenly, realizing that you truly have nothing on you to make an extended stay anywhere, you take a detour to the local Target to buy a couple cheap shirts and sweatpants as you know you won’t truly be going anywhere outside the cabin. You purchase your change of clothes and food items to take with you. You are so proud of yourself. You were able to withhold all your tears and emotions while there and even smiled at the cashier. You wonder, if she had looked any closer at your eyes or face if she could see the tracks of dried tears you feel there.

 You wonder, if she had looked any closer at your eyes or face if she could see the tracks of dried tears you feel there

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      Luckily the cabin isn’t too far up into the woods from the city. You used to love the fact that by living in New York, your grandmother’s cabin was only 2 hours away, so you could visit more often as she got older. You vow to yourself to push all thoughts aside of what just transpired so you can drive as safely as you can in the winding woods that surround your grandmother’s property. A lot of your family members were quite upset, when at the reading of her will, you were the one gifted with her cabin and they weren’t.

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