𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝘾𝘼𝙏 𝙄𝙉 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙃𝘼𝙏, 𝘤𝘩𝘶𝘶𝘺𝘢. 𝘯

𝙃𝙐𝙂𝙎 ; 𝙛𝙤𝙪𝙧

another forty minutes passed with no answers given, but you were pretty sure you were on the brink of passing out. your head felt cloudy, and you could feel your entire body pulse.

"chuuya, i'm going to pass out."

he walked over to you, before checking your pulse. to him, it felt awfully slow.

"head back to my office, i'll be up in a minute."

you nodded before walking up the many stairs connecting floor one to the basement.

once you were in the office, you took off the mask that covered the lower half of your face, taking a minute to catch your breath. guess he was right, it did restrict your breathing.

and it more than likely enhanced the smell of blood. it was soaked, from yesterday and today. you sighed, putting it inside your pocket. you'll wash it later.

his door opened and he looked over at you, you were laying on his little couch in his office. he was an executive so his office was fucking. huge.

"you're so fucking stupid." he sighed, closing his door and walking over to his desk, setting his hat down over on an empty side, before sitting down.

"how am i stupid?" you stayed laying down. every muscle in your body hurt.

"i told you to take off the damn mask. but you're so.. stubborn."

you scoffed. "what, because i'm not comfortable walking around with my whole face out?"

"that's not-"

you sat up, making direct eye contact with him. "chuuya, i've done things, probably worse than shit you've done. i don't feel like getting arrested. if someone were to escape after seeing my face, i'm fucked."

"no one gets out of here alive, no one will see your face. you're overthinking it." he sighed. "and i can assure you, whatever you've done, ive done worse."

you flopped back down onto the couch and groaned. this was too much work, even for you.

"i'm still gonna wear it, y'know?"

he rolled his eyes and scoffed before looking down at some paperwork on his desk. "and this is exactly why i said you're stupid."

you got up and walked over to the door, not noticing chuuyas confused look.

"where are you going?" he asked. he wouldn't have admitted it, but you were good company. "i'm going to find gin or higuchi. maybe even akutugawa. or tachihara. okay, i'll go find anyone."

"yeah, good luck with that."

every corner of the port mafia looked the same. as well as the hallways. no matter how much time you spent in the building, it always felt like you were getting lost. i mean, how many floors were in the damn building anyways?

you had spent your entire childhood here and it was still confusing.

eventually, you had found gins room. now, you were trying to gain the confidence to knock and ask to come in. you were just trying to calm the anxious feeling you had.

you knocked.

"come in."

ah, sweet gin. she was always super sweet and soft spoken. you had always found comfort in her voice.

you opened the door and she was sitting on her bed, as was higuchi. they both looked at you confused.

it took them both a minute till they realized who you were and gasped.

"hey." you weren't really sure how to go about this.. it had been awhile since you seen the both of them, and it seemed awkward to be there.

"[f/n]! holy fuck-"

in a matter of seconds, they were already hugging you. both of them. their embrace was warm, and you missed this. you missed the both of them, you had to admit.

"shit, where've you been? you reek of blood."

you stifled a laugh. "chuuya and i were torturing someone." there's a sentence that you didn't like saying.

"how long have you been back?" higuchi sat back on the bed, questioning you, while gin gave you a puzzled look. they were both wondering.

"since yesterday."

the atmosphere was uncomfortable after. you weren't sure how to continue talking, some questions you wanted to ask them lingered in the back of your mind. and you were sure they had some as well, such as things like 'what happened?' or 'where have you been?', and if you were being honest, you didn't have the motivation to answer any of them.

"chuuya texted, says he has your phone." higuchi chimed in.

"i must've left it in his office. i'll grab it in a bit." you grinned as higuchi started typing on her phone.

"speaking of chuuya.. how are things with him?" gin asked. things felt different but at the same time, nothing felt changed whatsoever.

that makes sense though. you were always close with him and dazai, and both of you leaving around the same time must've been hard on him.

"i don't know. it hasn't been long enough to see a change. why?"

gin and higuchi exchanged a rather.. concerning look before they both turned back to you.

"he went.. mental, when you both left." gin sighed. you bit your lip while waiting for her to continue. "when you left, he seemed to put up a front, told everyone he was okay, but dazai said he was ruthless on missions. he didn't show any remorse, and it seemed like he was taking his anger out on everyone around him." gin hinted to higuchi to finish talking. "when dazai left, he got blackout-drunk, to the point where you came up in almost every conversation. he drowned his sorrows in alcohol and acted like everything was alright, when it obviously wasn't. you coming back brought up some memories that his brain had blocked out." the both of them went silent, allowing for you to think about what they had said.

after a minute or two of repeating what they said over and over again, you left the room without saying anything. you just wanted to hug chuuya. him going through that is unimaginable, no wonder he's got trust issues.

you ended up finding him in a hallway, more than likely on his way moris office.

once he seen you, he looked at you weirdly, like you were.. i don't know.

"what are yo-"

you cut him off, surprising him with a hug that he never knew he needed.

your hat was in one hand, arms wrapped around his neck, while he stood there: stunned. he was confused, happy, but confused. no words were exchanged, but you knew that actions said a thousand words, and this said more than what you could've ever said.