𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝘾𝘼𝙏 𝙄𝙉 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙃𝘼𝙏, 𝘤𝘩𝘶𝘶𝘺𝘢. 𝘯

𝘿𝙍𝙐𝙉𝙆𝙀𝙉 𝘾𝙊𝙉𝙑𝙊𝙎 ; 𝙨𝙞𝙭

"fuck, my head is killing me."

his words brought you out of your sleep. when had you fallen asleep? luckily you slept against his bed.

"there is one of the reasons i don't drink."

he scoffed and looked down at you, your head was rolled back against his mattress.

"what the fuck do you mean? you drink." he rubbed his eyes. "you may not drink as much as me, but you still drink so don't get ahead of yourself."

he sat up in his bed, reached over and grabbed his phone off of his nightstand.

"okay, asshole, first of all, i'm the one who just sat on the floor in here for what, six and a half hours? fuck off." you scoffed.

what an ass.

you pulled your phone out of your back pocket and started texting akutugawa.

"there, akutugawa is on his way. you don't have to deal with me any longer." you groaned, annoyed by the fact that you had to text someone else.

a few minutes passed.

"since you won't talk to me, what the fuck is your problem? i'm sick of you and i've only been here for like four days."

he looked you dead in the eyes before opening his mouth to continue. "we have history together, and i don't like it. i don't like the fact that i can't remember it. i don't like how you act like you know me, when i don't even know who you are. everyone talks about you like you were their best friend. but you weren't. you were mine, and i can't remember you." he sighed. "do you know how terrible that feels?"

you took a moment to let that sink in. you hadn't imagined how bad he must've felt about the whole situation. you only thought about yourself. "if you had some communication skills then you could actually tell me yourself, but you don't, so don't get like that. i don't know how you feel. oh well, speak up."

"i feel terrible [f/n]! how thick is your fucking skull to not be able to understand that?!"

his hands made their way up to his hair, running them through said hair and letting out a deep breath.

"fuck this, i need a glass of wine or a cigarette or something." he got up out of his bed and walked over to a cabinet he had on the opposing side of the room. must've been where he kept his.. "important" items.."

"you want anything?" he kept his back turned towards you. "beer." he tensed his body before turning around. "beer? who the fuck drinks beer?" you threw your hands up in defeat. "fine, red wine, whatever the strongest you got is."

he lit a cigarette for himself before turning around and finding whatever his strongest wine was.

"are you looking to get tipsy? or like.. blackout drunk?" you thought to yourself for a moment. "blackout drunk."

"and do you have a balcony or some shit? i can't stand the smell of cigarettes. brings back memories of my childhood." you sighed. "unwanted memories."

he nodded before putting it out in an ashtray he had. "yeah, i'll go out there when i need another one."

he paused before tensing up.

"go on, ask whatever you're gonna ask." he turned around and leaned against the cabinet he had, crossing his arms over his chest in the process.

"when did you start smoking?"

he thought back for a while before replying. "technically speaking, it would've been back when i was like fourteen. but if you mean when did i start up again? that was when i was about 19-20. i only smoke when i'm annoyed or stressed. or in this case, hungover."

you sighed. it wasn't much different to you getting high when you're stressed. getting high makes life easier.

"do you still smoke weed?" he handed you the glass of wine, allowed you to take a drink and leaned back.

"yeah. why, you wanna get high?" you scoffed. "didn't take you as the stoner type."

his eyes rolled, a small grin showed up on his face.

"didn't take you as the type either. but yeah, i do want to get high."

you leaned back against his bed, relaxing your muscles. "do you keep in contact with dazai?"

"no. not really, ive seen him here and there, and we've talked a few times, but it's nothing nice." he sighed, which to be quite honest - sounded painful. "i.. i-uh.. i.. i heard he hasn't changed.. whatsoever. he's still.. trying to kill himself, so.. there's that.."

you were confused. was he making small talk? or was it buildup to a bigger question?

"alright.. communication. point blank. did you and dazai ever.. fuck?" he avoided eye contact, and made himself appear.. small. er.. smaller then he was.

"i wish. no, i'm just joking. we never did anything. i got drunk with him and oda a few times and it came close, but i couldn't bring myself to it. so, no. we never did."

you paused. this was awkward now. why was he asking in the first place?

"this wine is not blackout drunk wine. but, y'know. slay."

he looked baffled, like he had seen a ghost!

"did you just.. say slay?" his brow raised.

you nodded your head. "you bet your ass i did."

-

ok since i spent like three hours writing this i'm gonna leave it at that bc yk

slay.

no but i has covid and didn't even open wattpad once and like i should've written since i missed a week (!!) of school

i am also slaying in math bc yk

i wanna write a levi x reader but with smut bc i am a good smut writer so
look out for that one !!!

ion really know what else to say !!!

but like i will be writing a levi x reader and you cannot stop me so b on the look out for that one!!!