Bucky Barnes imagines

Me Before You

A/N: Soooo... I was originally going to make this short and sweet, a little angsty. But, as I kept writing, I decided I needed to make this like 99% angst and maybe 1% fluff? Honestly, this may have been one of the saddest stories I've written so far, so be warned! Let me know what you all think! 

-M <3

=========

Bucky never felt more at peace than when he was with the woman that he loved. If he could have it his way, he would spend all of his afternoons lounging on a blanket in a park and listening to her tell stories of her adventures at work. Unfortunately, Bucky was not always able to have that luxury. But, he always reserved Fridays a quarter past twelve to share his lunch with her. And that was where Bucky found himself now.

"Do you ever wonder what happens to us when we die?"

Bucky frowned, gazing up at her from his place flat on his back on their shared blanket. The question felt so sudden and very unexpected. As a man who was over a hundred years old, he supposed that he considered the reality of death every now and then. But after the threat of Thanos had disappeared and the events with the Flag Smashers had come to pass, Bucky only ever thought about what the rest of his life held for him.

There was no time to consider the end of his life when it felt like it was just beginning. Decades locked under HYDRA's control that was followed by five years of emptiness after the battle in Wakanda stole everything from him. Time, his family, and even Steve. As hard as it had been to move on from that loss, Bucky never considered that this was the end. But he found significantly more joy once he met Y/N. A new purpose, a new future... a new life.

"I suppose I have." Bucky shrugged, his gaze fixed on Y/N as she ate the last of her sandwich. "But I have nearly died too many times to count. I'm not ready to think about that part of my story yet. I want to make these years count."

"Of course." She smiled down at her boyfriend before laying down beside him, her head turned to face him. "I always just worry there will never be enough time."

"What? Because you're dating a man born over a hundred years ago?" Bucky snorted, a small smile playing on his lips. But the silence that followed made it drop immediately. "Are you actually worried-"

"Look, I'm not stupid. It's not like you're going to drop dead any day now." Y/N laced her fingers through his vibranium ones, bringing his hand up to kiss it gently. "I just worry about what the future will look like. I was scared shitless when you disappeared with Sam for weeks. I just don't know what I would do if something happened to you, baby. I really don't."

"Doll, I assure you, nothing will happen. And nothing has happened, thanks to this fancy new arm." Bucky smiled but felt it falter when noticing the lingering anxiety on her face. Guilt blossomed in his chest at the sight of her discomfort. How could he not have noticed this before?

He rolled onto his side, letting go of her hand and gently cupping her face with his other hand. "Y/N, look at me."

Her eyes flashed to his, and for a moment, Bucky felt his heart stutter in his chest. God, he would never get used to how beautiful they were.

"There is only one way that I will ever know what happens after death."

" And what way is that?" Y/N whispered, leaning into his touch gently.

"It will only happen after I have lived a long, happy life with you. Preferably somewhere away from this busy city, maybe with a few kids. Or, a few dogs. I'm very open. "

A soft giggle escaped her lips and Bucky smiled, letting his thumb gently wipe away a stray tear that fell from her eye.

"What I know for sure is that I will love you for every last day I exist in this life, and that is a promise." His heart nearly melted at the sight of her smile. " I want to live this life with you for as long as I can. But above all that, I promise you that it will be me before you, sweet girl. You will be the one to bury me."