Bucky Barnes imagines

Not Your Concern

A/N: hello, everyone. Long time no see. :) I can't believe its been three months since my last update, but I am so glad to be back. I have said this maybe once or twice before, but my life got insanely crazy these past few months, and I found myself in a place where I didn't know if I should keep writing, or if I should just give it up.  My mental health has also become something that I had to care for more closely, so I let myself have a small break before returning to you lovely people. Anyway, all of this to say... one, I'm glad to be writing here again and two, I've chosen to use my journey with depression is the inspiration for this imagine.  If any of you face similar struggles, please remember that you are loved and you are cared for. My messages are always open if you need someone to talk to. It would be impossible to imagine a world without you <3

-Megs <3

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WARNINGS: Topics surrounding depression may be triggering. The ending kinda sucks

Also, I'd say this has a bit more of a Steve x friend!Reader vibe to it, but I have of course added some fluff moments with our favorite Winter Soldier :)

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Nothing mattered anymore. 

Each day that my alarm clock went off, alerting me to the start of another day, I simply turned it off and pretended that my obligations didn't matter. My job could wait another day, my professor would probably be willing to accept my homework one day late, and so on. The list never seemed to end, and I comforted myself in the simplicity of the decision not to do anything. 

I found one morning myself lost in the warmth of my sheets, staring up at the ceiling of my bedroom, unable to fall into the dark, comforting warmth of sleep.  To be fair, it was already half past noon, and although I longed to go to sleep, my body felt otherwise. 

A gentle knock broke the comforting silence of my room, and I glanced in the direction of the door, unwilling to stand to go open the door.  There were a few moments of silence before I heard the second knock. 

"Y/N?"  I resisted the urge to pull the covers above my head at the sound of Steve's voice. This was the third time he had to come to check in on me, and frankly, I wasn't interested in engaging in conversation. "Are you awake?" 

"Yeah." My answer was short and clipped, hopefully a warning sign to him that I wasn't interested in talking. 

But unfortunately, for some reason that translated as a sign to enter my room, pushing the door open and turning on the lights.  At this point, I yanked the sheets above my head, my slight annoyance bubbling much closer to pure anger.  "Steve! Turn the goddamn light off!" 

His footsteps grew closer to my bed, and I felt the bed dip next to where I was laying. A hand gently pulled the sheet down, and I was forced to look at my best friend's face. His eyes were sad,  his eyebrows furrowed in concern. 

"Why are you still in bed this late?" 

"I don't know why this is of any concern of yours." I snapped, letting my gaze fall to the floor, not eager to continue such a conversation with him. 

"You're one of my closest friends... and my other best friend's girlfriend, who made me promise to take care of you while he was gone.  This feels like a concern of mine, indeed." Steve pointed out, and I couldn't help the tears building up in my eyes at the mention of my partner.

Bucky had left for a mission God knows where. He had reassured me that he'd only be gone for a month at the longest, and promised to return to me as soon as he could.  But that had been over two months ago.