You're standing here infront of the door of our Review shop then you might as well come in. If you have stumbled up on this shop means it's destiny. You can't go back right now without coming in first. That's the rule of Our nightshade Review shop...
It’s grammatically incorrect, so I’m having a hard time comprehending it, so I’m not sure if I can give you any points since I don’t know what it’s saying.
When his heartfelt love… what? What did it do? If you fix that, then I’d be able to properly mark it. But it’s going somewhere.
◖﹒SYNOPSIS - 15/15
Probably my favorite part of the entire book. It leaves us wondering. Your formatting was also good, your awards at the bottom and the actual blurb at the top. I loved it all in all.
◖﹒CREATIVITY - 8/10
It’s not that new. You took the idea of a forced marriage and added new levels onto it, and it works. You added a lot to it, like the thing about Yoongi and Jia and Jichu and everything.
I liked your creativity.
◖﹒PACING - 4/10
It’s quite slow, that may be because of your relatively short chapters. Some are a bit longer, but not by a massive amount.
It took a while to figure out what in the world was happening since that’s the amount of time it took for us to get the information.
◖﹒ELEMENTS - 7/10
I loved your plot elements and that they all added something to the plot all together, although it was in a weird order, so it was a bit hard to piece together.
Like here’s the past, then present, past, present, and so on, so it got a bit confusing. Maybe have less flashbacks. Some of them could be connected together, so maybe put the ones that can go with each other into one long one so it flows better.
◖﹒CHARACTERS - 7/15
The characters didn’t have all too much depth. Also, 3-year-olds don’t act like Jichu, they can talk, but they usually don’t have favorite idols.
It’s not like he can just go and search it up either since Jia ‘hates’ Taehyung that much. All Jichu knows is what shows up and Jia does everything to make sure he doesn’t latch onto him. Even if he did see the photos of him, how does he know his name? You need to think about how 3-year-olds act.
Jia had too much going wrong with her life, sort of like a y/n. While they made sense and everything, it seemed that only Jia was affected by it and not Suga nearly as much.
The other characters were fine, but they could use more characteristics.
◖﹒GRAMMAR - 9/10
You did great, but one of your titles (chapter 6) is grammatically incorrect. Your title is also grammatically incorrect. I also found some grammatical errors within your writing.
◖﹒WRITING STYLE - 7/15
Your writing style fluctuates a lot, sometimes it’s childish then it goes serious, then childish again, and serious again; hope you get the gist.
Writing like this isn’t bad, it can have a beautiful outcome (like Rick Riordan’s writing) but it sometimes changes mid-chapter and in a place that doesn’t make sense for it to have a tone-change.
I also don’t like the use of memes in the book since this is supposed to be a book-book not a meme-book. They also make your chapters seem way longer than they really are. But otherwise, I like your writing.
