:Distorted Beauty

"Dear Old Dad"

You never really told me you hate me, I just knew.

When you would come home from a long day....

I wish there were few.

You would come looking for the children,

doing things that you could never undue.

This home was and is your castle,

barley keeping together by mom's Elmer's Glue.

If I gave you a wrong glance or said the wrong thing,

challenge say accepted,

Because no child was going to cross you,

not in mind nor in spirit.

I really did hate you, you know.

Equally if not more than you hated me.

I use to fantasize you got mulled by a pack of wolves,

Or hit by a bus.

I thought the family would be sad,

but thought they'll get over it soon enough.

When something went wrong you came running to me,

Because you were never ever in the wrong,

"BRING YOUR ASS HERE STEPHANIE!"

Now lets's not get it twisted,

I was no saint and I'll be the first one to admit that,

I was disrespectful and out of line,

Typical teenager always thinking the world was mine.

I would scream and shout,

And turn the home upside down,

Come home late and tried not be around.

Hated going to church and thought of God as who?

Didn't like being home with you or mom,

Never read a statement more true.

But you were the one to raise the first punch,

Or the eighth slap,

The thirtieth hair pull,

And the fifty kicking me in my back.

Reminiscing on past events,

 that my mind had conveniently blocked out.

Wondered why we couldn't have a normal relationship,

As some daughters and fathers do.

Why the anger lingers,

Like a girl with a fresh tattoo?

But I knew.

I hate you too much and that I learned from you.