Not Now Not Ever#1

Chapter 24

Tate McRae – Bad Ones

I sat in my balcony waiting for the sun to set, I woke up earlier than usual. And no, I did not have a Nightmare but can't understand why I’ve been disturbed by his presence, he's my past and I don’t reside in the past, at least not this one.

“Beautiful.” I whispered while watching the sun rise. Lucky Oluwalola Valentina Lozano, sounds sarcastic to me. “You cower, they'll dominate.”

I stood up going to the bathroom to do my morning routine. “Time to get ready.” I took 20 minutes in the bathroom before drying my hair doing a centre pattern and combing it down leaving it like that. This time, I carried a rucksack putting two cans of pepper spray, deep heat spray, hair pins and itching powder.

“Good morning.” I smiled taking my sour at the table. “Finally.” I sighed when I saw what Alicia prepared for breakfast, it's her turn to cook for the entire week. Circle shaped waffles cut in cone shape with ice cream on it and syrup round with blue berries toppings and a bowl of milky cereal with sliced bananas in it. After all the bitter food I ate and drank the previous day, I was scared my love for sweet vanished.

“Eat up, they’ll be here any minute.” Ali urged me smiling with her teeth.

Delicious… the milk is Rich and it being eaten with sliced bananas and cereal is… gosh, I can’t explain and the waffles aren't deprived of enough eggs and sugar, I love it when it's made from the scratch instead of the mixed version. Sometimes, we use it cause we have cartons of it in the house since Aunty, Uncle and our brothers keeps stocking our store regularly and it's too many so, sometimes we give our security teams, they are humans too they need food to survive.

We all complimented the meal after we were through with eating. “See you guys in school.” I waved at them.

“Why don't you give him a chance?” Lia voice stopped me in my tracks.

“Give him a chance?” Does she mean Travis? But…

“Gio, he's serious.” She clarified my thoughts sighing crossing her hands on her chest.

“About?” I was lost not comprehending what she just said.

“Driving you to school.” Linda filled in quickly keeping eye contact with Lia.

“I’m not his responsibility.” I dismissed the conversation turning around walking away.

“Good morning Lucky.” Gio smiled brightly when I stepped out of the house.

I didn't use the door leading to our garage cause I guessed the car should be waiting for me.

“Let's go.” He held my hand walking to the only passenger door seat in the car. He opened the door and closed it when I got in.

When did we become so close?

Tate McRae – Feel Like Shit

Classes started ten minutes after we arrived and thankfully, Travis hasn't said a word since we met in the hallway. I admit, I don't feel comfortable with him beside me, it's suffocating and memories tries to flood in.

Breathe in, breathe out

Breathe in, breathe out

In out, in out

First period passed, second passed, the third period passed and it's lunch time but I’m frozen, I don't want to turn and meet his eyes or even see him.

Mommy, I need you. I need you now.

I inhaled a shaky breath gasping when I found it difficult to breathe. I closed my eyes trying to take control of my emotions, I shut my the outside world repeating my mantra in my head.