Follow Ash and his explosive experiments as he goes through adventures with his friends on Red Team and those Dirty Blues.
Season 1-10
(I don't own anything other than Ash.)
Church: (voice over) Hi, my name is Leonard Church.
Fade into an overhead view of Epsilon's mental image of Blood Gulch.
Church: (voice over) But nobody calls me Leonard. Most people call me Church sometimes they call me Alpha and a few people even know me as the Director, but I haven't been called that in a really, really long time. You see I know that when you look at me, I know I look like a super badass space warrior, but I'm really not. I'm actually a-
Tucker:(off screen) Hey, Church!
Church: (voice over) Uh... (clears throat) Just, uh, ignore him. I'm actually a computer program that's been reincarnated in the memory of-
Tucker: Church!
Tucker continues yelling in the background as Church continues his monologue
Church: (voice over) I'm actually a computer program that's been reincarnated in the memory of the-
Tucker: Where the hell are you?!
Church: (voice over) Okay...I'm just gonna start over. I'm just...I'm gonna go back to the beginning
Tucker: Church!
Church: (voice over) (clears throat) Hi.
Tucker: Church!
Church: (voice over) My name is Leonard Church.
Tucker: Church!
Church: (voice over) But nobody calls me-
Tucker appears atop the cliff.
Tucker: Hey Church, come on!
Church: (groans) God damn it! What?! What do you want!?
Tucker: Come on! Get up here!
Church: Yeah, okay, hold on. For God's sakes, I'm coming! Shut up! (whispers to himself on the way up) God damn it, I can't even have one fucking moment to myself. Can't even be alone with my thoughts, not even for a second. Somebody's always gotta fucking yell, or scream, or "come look at this," or "what's going on over here," or "hey Church, help me out I don't know what the fuck I'm doing!" Fucking assholes. God I forgot how much this place sucks.
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