My happiness

Hopes for a new daddy

Warnings: none

Word count: 623

Not proofread

"I don't get why you're so mad mommy...I should be the one mad. You said you'd never leave me again and here we are going through the same crap again.", Alanna told Natasha.

It was not really usual for her to talk like that but it was the truth she was telling. Natasha had told her she would never leave her again and she hadn't forgotten it either.

"It's dangerous here Al, that's why I'm mad!"

Natasha didn't even realize she was yelling at Alanna. There was this rage building up in her, she just couldn't control herself anymore.
She was on this mission and she didn't know how she would make it out of this specially now that her daughter was with her.
Anything could happen to her now. Alanna wasn't safe anymore. She wasn't with Laura and the kids, instead she was with her now and Natasha didn't even know what to do.

"Well, you won't even notice me. I have my backpack here, with clothes and some toys, I'll stay here. I can take care of myself.", she answered her more confident than ever.

"No, you won't stay in this room!", Nat declared frustrated.

"I thought that's what you wanted me to do! Gosh why does everything always have to be so stressful with you!?"

"I want you to to be with me all the time so that I can be sure you're safe.", Natasha managed to calm down rubbing her forehead in disbelief.

Why did Alanna have to be so stubborn?

"Alright mama.", she said more quiet, now that she knew that any other bad move could get her into more trouble than she already is in. 

***

"Mama...?"

Natasha turned around to face her. It had been pretty late by now and Alanna couldn't sleep. She had one of her well known nightmares once again. She was wondering how on earth her mother was able to sleep with everything going on outside their room. She asked herself why the was people had to be so loud. Why they had to work so much. I mean, they could at least take a break so that she could try to sleep.

"Hmm?", Natasha answered absent.

"Are you still mad at me?"

"Uh uh.", she answered once again, now turning around facing the wall.

"Please turn around mommy...", Alanna told her with teary eyes. She was starting to remember everything from her nightmare. It was awful. It was like she was reliving everything in the red room.

Nat quickly realized that whatever was going on with Alanna must've been bad, so she again turned around.

"I'm scared mommy..."

"Come here baby..", Natasha said before pulling Alanna into a hug.

And at this exact moment she finally started feeling safe.

***

"Mommy, who was this man you were talking to earlier??", Alanna asked, curious about who that blond blond, tall, strong built man was.

"Baby like I told you earlier, that's captain America."

"I like him, he's nice.", Alanna said looking up to her mother.

"Do you like him?", she then asked with a grin on her face.

Natasha knew what game she was playing. Thats the question Alanna always asked her when she saw a nice man. Steve seemed like the perfect guy for her mom. Well, better than the other ones.

She didn't want to tell it to her mom, she didn't want her to feel sad, but she wanted a dad really bad. Someone that treated her like her uncle Clint treated Lila. Sadly she didn't have one, she was on her way of getting along with it though.

"He's nice.", Nat answered her.

"And....nothing more?", Alanna asked disappointed.

"Nope." Natasha said.

"Ok mother."