Your Dark Stars - Highschool K/DA x Male Reader

118 - What I want to hear.

I take my time getting back to the venue, just to clear my head and find a way to convince myself that I didn't make a shitty decision - every few seconds feels like I made a mistake but I know even if I wanted to chase after her now.

It would be far too late to achieve anything significant.

My phone has been going crazy with people trying to reach me, I lost my chance to perform only just to kick myself in the gut. I reach the place but I don't try to make myself known at all - everyone is busy enough.

Akali... would to all of them, disappear as if she was never here.

Michelle then walks around the corner as she states, "You went for her, she isn't here and I am still alive - looks like things have a way of working out."

I then shoot her a pained expression, "Why? Why would you just... convince me that letting her go is the best thing here?"

"Because it isn't about what you want, it is what she needs," she pats my shoulder, "Going to put it as bluntly as possible so that it sticks with you."

"I hate that - letting people hear what they want to hear."

She then chuckles, "Why? You are so good at it."

"She is gone, and you are still cracking jokes."

"Not to make it about myself, but I am dying here," she clears her throat, then lets out a cough before slamming her chest, "You missed it, Evelynn and Ahri performed to their best - even have some of the record labels after them."

She continues, "They even asked me what to do, I said talk to them because right now the future is uncertain and at least this way they'd have something to distract themselves with while they mourn the loss of Akali."

Despite my silence, she then talks to me, "You should tell them - I didn't want to do it because it isn't my place to do it," she hovers for a moment as she sighs, "Please just say something, you are starting to make me want to kill myself."

"What do you want me to say?" I ask in a dead tone.

"What I want to hear," she quips, then walks away.

She doesn't get far before almost stumbling over her feet and crashing into the wall. I grab her keeping her on her feet only for her to push me away, "I am not a cripple-" she groans as she collapses to her knees.

"Michelle-"

She is breathing heavily, her face is pale as she looks at me with a smile, "You know... you might lose more than one person today at this rate."

***   ***   ***

Unconscious in a bed, white walls, white sheets, white uniforms.

If she woke up right now she'd mistake it to be heaven or her own personal hell. I still haven't looked at my phone, but everyone that was near me already promised me that they'd tell the three of them what happened.

Fuck.

I walk out of the hospital building, sitting at one of the outside benches with orange skies overhead - the day is already coming to an end and rather quickly - it feels like I haven't got a chance to recover fully.

I hear footsteps getting closer and closer, "Where is she?" I glance up to see Jake as I then gesture to the hospital, "Room B14. Ask the receptionist."

He then rests his hand on my shoulder, "Are you okay?"

I then chuckle as I ask, "Do I look okay?" then shaking my head, "I am just feeling sad for myself, she is the one dying isn't she?"

"I'll be with you in a moment."

I only nod as he disappears. I glance up to see that the other three are speed walking towards me with worried expressions - what do I tell them first? That I didn't stop Akali from running away? Or that I was hiding Michelle's condition from the people who knew her the longest?

Kai'Sa drops down next to me, almost sliding into me, "Are you okay?"

"What happened?" Evelynn asks, "Where is Akali?"

I don't look at them as I take a deep breath.

"Akali is gone-"

"What do you mean gone?" Kai'Sa asks instantly, "She left? Why... w-why would she just leave without telling any of us?"

I answer again, "The Kinkou are after her and are trying to find her - I only found her out of luck and... I let her go."

Ahri sighs, "(Y/N)..."

"Why would you let her go?" Kai'Sa exhales, her tone brittle, "We could have-"

"Could have done what?" I ask her, then giving her my pained expression - her angry expression mixed with her sad tone is chipping away at my sanity, "Keep her here, with those bastards constantly trying to get to her?"

I pull away my gaze, I just feel like I am just snapping at her for no reason.

Then looking at the two in front of me, "Michelle is dying."

"And you didn't think to lead with that?!" Evelynn snaps at me, "What the fuck do you mean dying?"

"Heart failure," I tuck my head back between my shoulders, "Room B14. Ask the receptionist."

She doesn't waste any time as she disappears in front of me. Ahri then shoots me a pained expression before running after her - leaving the two of us behind to sit on this fucking bench outside of a hospital.

I lift myself and tuck my hands in my pockets, "Where are you going?" she asks me.

"Away from here."

She grabs me by the wrist stopping me, I don't stop as she then resorts to hugging me to keep me in place, "Please don't walk away from us."

I shake my head, "I just want to clear my head-"

"I can't lose you too," she whispers, "Not another one. Please... don't let me watch you walk away like that... I don't want that," I struggle to find the words as she begs, "Please... just say something."

I breathe out with a shaky breath, "I didn't want to let her walk away... I just couldn't stop her knowing that if I did it wouldn't solve anything. That it would have been worse off if she was around us where they could find her."

"I didn't want to be the reason she hated it here..." then with a frustrated laugh, "I even wanted to tell all of you about Michelle - but she made me promise not to tell anyone off you about it so that when this happens..."

"She has her reasons," she tries to reassure me.

I can feel my anger coming back but I calm myself, knowing there is no point in getting angry at Kai'Sa who is just as beaten as the rest of us. Fuck man she didn't even do anything to deserve it.