Outside my head

Chapter 4

I was inside the bathroom way longer than I intended to be in there, It took me about 40 minutes just to get out of the bath. Afterward, I walked back into my room and changed into something more comfortable, and just plopped down onto my bed. Maybe I should pretend to be sick tomorrow just so I don't have to go to school I don't feel like being any more annoyed than I already am, so I sat up taking my phone outside my bag just to check my social media for once in awhile nothing changed minus all the unread notifications I have from Instagram telling me so and so posted on their stories...Not only that I noticed Simon had sent out an announcement on the school page that read "Bring a date and have some fun on October 24th for the Halloween-themed dance but this year's theme will be no other than DEAD MEAT, Don't forget that there will be a voting for the best-looking couple and the winners get a prize of $200 from the states collage Weaster Coalesce University: Farther questions please report to room 106 In building A from 9:30 am-1:00 pm." I had no idea they were even doing an event for Halloween this year, I wonder if Natalie would be interested in going with me. She'll probably end up going with her other friends though but I can't exactly ask Simon to go with me plus I'm sure he's gonna be busy socializing around with others...I think I'm just going to stay home. After scrolling for a bit I got bored and walked downstairs to see my dad and Simon sitting in the living room together "I think you should do whatever you think is the right thing to do, Don't be afraid to ask anyone a question like that Simon"
"What are you guys talking about?"
"Nothing important, Just asking him about something I want to ask a teacher." Simon stood up slowly and walked toward me and my dad smiled gesturing me to come and sit next to him, I looked up at Simon and he gave me a light nod before walking upstairs. I sat next to my father "What's going on with you two buddy, You both seem off today. Just talk to me." He said wrapping his arm around my shoulder, I didn't bother to look at him I just stared at my hands lightly fidging with them "Dad, What am I supposed to do whenever I get worried about ruining someone else's life that I care about whenever I'm around them or have any interaction with them at all..."
"So that's it...Jack, you need to remember not everyone is going to be fond of you no matter what, it could be because of your race, the way you dress, your sexual preference, shit it could even be because of the way you walk. You shouldn't be worried about ruining Simon's life, if you love each other you will find something that makes the both of you comfortable. Focus on what makes you two happy, not what others think."
What make's us happy, and not thinking about what others think of us...That sounds amazing but at the same time I don't want to get outted, I'd rather come out on my own time instead. "...Thanks Papa, I love you." I hugged him, making my way back into my room to see Simon looking at my phone "What are you doing?" I asked sitting next to him, He looked at me turning on my screen to reveal my Lock Screen which was a picture of us together in a pile of leaves, It's always been one of my favorite pictures. Simon doesn't set people as his Lock Screen but he does have a widget of me secretly on his phone even though it is a picture of me from when I slipped while we were ice skating and I've asked multiple times for him to delete it. I still think it's sweet that he has a picture of me somewhere on his home screen "Anyways, Should we talk now?"
"Yeah" I took a deep breath "Long story short, Emily came up to me in the library and told me she saw me kissing "a guy" but in reality it was you and once she told me I was a bit scared she was gonna find out about us and so I asked what she wanted from me to keep it a secret. She has an interest in Chase and wants him to ask her out to prom and apparently, she's seen me with him and so she thinks were "close" Now she wants me to get Chase to talk to her and hopefully get him to fall for her just so she can keep her mouth shut...The only thing about it is that I don't exactly talk to Chase. I partner with him in math sometimes and he'll sit with me during lunch if all his friends are gone or busy but overall we don't really know each other and so I'm not just lost I'm completely fucked." It went quiet for a moment which is understandable considering I just explained how I don't know what I'm supposed to do, Simon hugged me slowly rubbing my back. He was being so gentle now, It makes me feel safe around him every time...Now that I told him everything I feel a little better I mean it wasn't as bad as I thought and Simon isn't upset with me so I'm glad.
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"I'm glad we have a plan now, But now that the Emily thing is planned out where are we gonna make out during school now...?"
"I don't know" I sighed "We make out a lot, Maybe it's just a sign telling us to slow down"
"You could be right but no one said signs were always right~" He smirked pouncing onto me like a cheetah, I chuckled and kissed him. Though me and Simon act mutual at school we're pretty much your average couple whenever we're alone and minus the fact we are both the same gender, We kiss, go on dates, joke around, etc. I wish people could know Simon belongs to me, But I can't just say that...There is something else I can do to prove that he isn't available even if he won't approve of it I can't help but get a bit jealous whenever I imagine all of the girls asking him out or teasing and flirting with him to get a chance.