falling

who are you

I am startled awake by loud voices somewhere in the apartment. I hear Brandons voice. It sounds as if he is angry. There is another voice, but its barely audible. Chloe flew to Stockholm for the day on business and I am so confused in what is going on. I am scared, mostly because that feeling in my stomach of what I might hear or witness. What if there is girl? Brandon having an affair? Would he really do that with his fiancees sister sleeping in a room down the hall.I dont think so, but people have surprised me before... but still, Brandon? It just didn't add up but, he kept on... at whoever he was going at.

"What the hell are you doing"  "What are you thinking"  "You can be really fucking stupid for such an A grade student"  "Its been two days since the New Years eve party and you are still fucking drunk, high or whatever the hell you are" "I thought we had an agreement for fucks sake" 

It sounds horrible, Brandon is truly going at her/him. I stand at the door in my room and listen, the other voice is so low I can't make anything they are saying, not even if its a girl or boy. Eventually I hear Brandons bedroom door slam shut and silence follows. What is going on? 

I push through my nervousness and open the door of my room to go to the bathroom. All this eavesdropping and confusion has woken me up and I have to pee. My mind is still running hundred miles a second about what I just heard when I turn the corner to step into the bathroom my eyes lock with a boy standing in front of me. That boy.

J: Ahh - I scream and jump back a little

H: Shh

J: You? What are you doing here?

H: Keep your voice down. He is already mad as it is. 

I keep staring at him. What is going on? 

H: Who are you? - he says after assessing me for a second as well

I blink a few times trying to make sense the situation. I am hurt that he doesn't remember me. Its been two days. He was pretty out of it, which isn't much different from how he looks now. But, I thought he would have remembered meeting someone endearing, which is what he called me. 

J: I am Jo. Chloes sister

H: Who is Chloe? - he asks confused

J: Brandons fiancee - I say slowly

H: Oh yeah. Right. Of course - he lifts his hands and rubs the sides of his head, closing his eyes.

H: My head is killing me - he tells me like to explain his momentarily memory loss. He looks as if he is carrying the world on his shoulders, looking nothing like the fun, smiley guy from the nightclub at New Years. 

As I stand there trying to dispatcher him, he brings his eyes on me again. He looks lost.

J: How do you know Brandon? Why are you in their apartment? 

H: He is my manager. 

THIS is the new basketball protege Brandon was bragging about on the way from the airport? The drunk stoner! His body definitely looks like an athlete, but his eyes tell a whole different story. They look tired and haunted, like he has been off the rails for days. I know the look, it was my go-to look from 14-16 years. Its a lonesome road, and one that only more pain and hurt accompany, making running from it impossible. I wonder what got him on that road in the first place? He is a basketball protege for Christ, having one of the best, most caring managers in his corner. 

H: Do you wanna go first? - he startles me out of my thoughts and motions for the bathroom 

I had forgotten I even had to use it. 

J: No, its fine. You go

He nods his head and steps inside, closing the door behind him.

He leaves me staring at the door he closed. I hear the faucet go off and the water running. Why is he here? Brandon is so firm on separating his business and private life, but he is letting this guy stay the night? I don't know if he ever even invited Mio or Dante for dinner, let alone sleep here. 

I have so many questions about this, the noisy little creature that I am.