I miss her.
Just seeing her freaking miniature picture on her IG profile has me smiling like a goof. I have been laying in my bed for an hour contemplating to send her a request to follow her or not.
Its been six days since she left London, and every night for the past six days have I spent like this, debating with myself, to send an request or not. Eventually Brandons voice in my head always wins. His exact words were never "stay away from her" but it could be read in between the more elegant he chose to use "I don't think you are stable enough for her. Or for anyone right now. You have a lot to work on. Focus on yourself. I don't think you have the space for it, neither in your head or in your life." And he is probably right. I have a lot of shit to work through, and I have to focus on finishing high school and on basketball. Because that's the only thing that is gonna take me away from this shithole.
At the same time I can't ignore the goofy smile on my face, and the feeling of my heart almost aching as it is making a reach for her. It doesn't have to amount to anything. It would just be talking. To hear her ramble about unfairness and diversity of cities, of polarized politicians and the media not giving attention where it is due. I miss her humor. I miss the way she made me laugh, and I miss even more when I made her laugh. I miss her gentle smile and her kind eyes that seem to hold a few rough stories of their own. I miss her straightforwardness but, at the same time her nervousness and cautiousness. The one I was witness to when we almost kissed in the kitchen at Brandons. She was so nervous you would think she was having her first kiss. What if she was? No I don't think so. I don't know why I don't but, I don't.
Shit! If only Brandon knew how much I was thinking about this girl, he would beg me to text her. Instead I am here again looking at her miniature picture like some fucking creep. If it was open I could just scroll, preferably daily, and no one would know.
Loud music starts playing through the walls. Fuck. Again. I have been here for five days and am already sick of this place. I am grateful Brandon found the apartment. It was suppose to give me privacy, but at the same time make me focus the last semester, both on school and basketball so I stay on the right track en route to a career abroad. Although housing me in a collective with a bunch of stoners and party-goers that do nothing but slum it all day I am not sure was the best choice. Especially given my history. That he is regularly concerned about I will repeat.
The music and voices become louder through the walls of my small room. I take a deep breath and click on the request button.
YOU ARE READING
falling
Teen Fictiontwo lost senior high schoolers bump into each other. literally. they slowly creep into each others lives❤️ but as their high school days are coming to an end, and they are both aspiring for dreams and futures of their own, they are put to the test...
