falling

one thing

"I'm gonna hit the shower" - he says as he goes straight for the bathroom when we get back. I don't know why he felt the need to tell me that, but it's nice. For a second there it felt like we were a couple, caring to share each others whereabouts at any point. It was a foreign feeling to me. I have been in an on and off relationship with Dylan since 15 so my reference point for relationships isn't exactly normal. I wondered if Hero had any relationships? What were they like? Who were the girls? I let myself imagine what kind of boyfriend he would be. A pretty hot one. And cute. And attentive. And gentle. And smart. And funny. And with eyes that radiated so much warmth that they melted my heart with every minute spent together.

I am startled when he comes out of the bathroom with only a towel around his waist.

F... me! I gulp. And I am not the least subtle about my staring. I knew he was hot, but this was... this was just unfair. I gulp again. Feeling like my eyeballs were gonna plop out of my eyes. I should probably look away but, I was watching him like a damn favorite ice cream I wanted to lick every inch of. 

It takes me a minute to realize that I am not breathing even though my heart is throbbing so hard it feels its gonna make a jump out of my chest any second. Thats when I notice his tattoos as well, the two doves on either side of his stomach, I don't even miss the little half a heart on each of them, having a deep contrast with its red on the grey and black doves. There are two on his arms, both on the left arm. I notice the one being a basketball, the other one is of a rose. The flower is painted red, but the leaves and the stilk are grey. If it was even possible for him to become any hotter, I think he just did in my book, just for the tats.

I open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes out, so I smile. He smiles too, all cocky. I have seen this look before. I saw it at New Years when he tried to get me to go up to the rooftop to see "the view" with him, the only difference being now he is completely present. And his eyes are dancing with amusement.

I suck in my cheeks and clear my throat, nod and walk past him and into my room. All the while smiling, him as well. 

I hear him chuckle and go to his room, closing the door. Shit! I am never coming out of this room. I am leaving the day after tomorrow anyway, so a day and a half in this room is not so bad. A text from Brandon pings on my phone

B: "Hey, you home yet? I am at the arrivals waiting for Chloe. I though we could do a movie night? I invited some friends of Hero. I think he needs it. You up for it?"

J: Yes, of course. That will be fun. I can go get some snacks"

B: "Already got it"

J: "Pringles sour cream and onion?"

B: "Two tubes"

J: "ILY"

B: ":D"

I guess I am going out of this room sooner than I thought. But this is good, an apartment full of people, I wount even have to look at him. I wonder who of his friends are coming over? I hope its Theo, Delilah and Freddie. I liked them.

Two hours later the movie night is in full swing. The apartment is filled with Heros friends which I am surprised Brandon knows quite well, even Chloe knows Theo. The film is playing on the projector in the living room, and with the accompanied sound system it is really making it feel we are at the theater. Theo, Delilah and Freddie have joined us, as well as Mack, Shannon and Luke. Heros other friends, Lewis, Liam and his girlfriend Cat also appear, in addition to our  current household, Chloe, Brandon, Hero and I.

We are sitting apart which is for the best. I still haven't said anything after the hallway encounter. Neither has he, even though I have noticed him looking my way a few times but, I pretend to not notice. I just can't handle it. He is starting to make me feel nervous and I don't like it. I don't know what it is, but I don't like it.