Before The Fame

Chapter 19

Michael's P.O.V
I'm walking to Am's house with a boost of confidence. Even though I'm leaving with the boys tomorrow I want to ask her. We've kissed so she already knows that I like her. I call Calum for help with how I'm going to do this. It rings a few times then he picks up. "Hello?" Calum asks with a cracked voice. "Cal you okay?" I ask out of concern. "No Mindy broke up with me because we're leaving. Luke broke up with Aleisha yesterday. I'm a mess and Luke is doing okay I guess. His brothers are out doing something with him to get his mind off of it." He says. I stop and get onto the sidewalk. "I'm sorry Calum. Would it be better if I come over there instead of going to Am's?" I ask. "I can just meet you over there. I need to get out anyways. I've been inside all morning." He laughs out. "Okay well by-" I start to say but he cuts me off. "Ask her out before I get there!" I laugh and say 'okay'. He hangs up and I keep walking to Amarina's house.
Two blocks later I'm knocking on her front door. My heart is pounding faster and faster with every second. The door opens and I see Amarina's beautiful smile. "I have something to tell you." I say.
"Me too." She says with excitement.
"You go first." I tell her motioning for her to talk.
She takes a breath and then regains her smile. "Aaron and I are dating!" She says and I loose my smile. I can feel my face flush and my heart stops. This can't be happening. No. No this can't be real. "So what was it you wanted to tell me?" She asks. I gulp and think of something. "Uh....I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out with Calum and I today." I say with a fake smile. She nods with a smile and opens the door wider. Amarina closes the door and walks over to her gaming system. "I just got Call of Duty so we can play that instead of playing Mario cart." She says while putting in the game. I nod and sit on her couch still shocked. Am gives me a controller and sits next to me. I look at her and she has a slight smile on her face.
I should have asked her as soon as I knew I liked her. If I did then maybe my heart wouldn't hurt. If I did then maybe we would be together. Michael you need to stop with the 'ifs' or your going to break down. I think to myself.
The game menu is on the screen and she presses the play button. "You ready to get your ass handed to you?" She smirks. "The real question is, are you?" I say. She smiles while shaking her head and the game starts.
*********
A few hours later we take a break from playing. We sit on the couch eating sandwiches as she talks about how her dads are upset because of her science grade. "It's stupid because why do I need to know about what cells are made up of? I'm not even going to do anything with cells with what I want to be." She rants while eating her sandwich. I sigh and take a bite while she continues. "You okay Mikey?" She asks with concern in her kind green eyes. "Y-ya I'm fine. I invited Calum over because his girlfriend broke up with him today." I say looking at my hands. "I hope he's okay." She says and I can hear the concern in her voice.
Seconds later there's a knock at the door. Amarina gets up to go answer it. "Hey Calum." She says. Calum just waves and walks inside. As he makes his way to the couch he smirks at me. "Cal do you want anything?" Amarina asks. "No I'm fine Am. I just need to talk to Michael for a minute." He says while dragging me into the kitchen. "Well okay. I'm gonna turn the game back on." She says as Calum and I go into the kitchen.
"So what did she say?" Calum whispers to me.

"I didn't ask her." I whisper back while looking at my hands.

"Why the fuck not?"

"Calum her and Aaron are together now. I can't ask her now. Not ever. I was just a phase. I was never it. He was always it. It never was and never will be me." I say with a cracked voice on the bridge of tears.