Autumn Showers

5- The one where someone goes missing

I bit my bottom lip as my thoughts become almost deafening, my heart was beating so erratically, I was worried it was going to come out of my chest. Hot tears roll down my cheeks, I pace up and down my room, trying to catch my breath.

But I can't.

And realising this just makes my heart squeeze together tighter, I started a new anti-depressant medication a few days ago, and Claudia warned me that sometimes it can make your anxiety feel worse before it gets better.

But this was unbearable, I just want to scream but I know if I open my mouth nothing will come out.

Sobs rack my body as I slide down my bedroom door, out of the corner of my eye I can see a disregarded teddy bear, my father got me when I was young, my trembling hands reach forward and grab it before hurling it towards my wall.

I just need to breath.

I press my fingertips together, so I'm able to try and ground myself, but I can't, nothing is working.

Hot and cold flushes spread throughout my body as dizziness waves over me, I shake my head as my cries become louder, I press my hands against my chest.

Please.

Please someone just make this stop.

I can't cope with it anymore.

I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket, I furrow my eyebrows at the unknown number calling me, my breathing is still shallow but slightly steadier, as I hesitantly answer the phone.

This was probably a really bad idea, I just wanted to be able to distract myself from how I was feeling, I just need anything.

'Hey, is this Autumn?'

My stomach churns as the voice registers my ears, 'L-Lucas?'

'Are you out for a run or something? Why do you sound so out of breath?'

I sniffle slightly before wincing, 'Y-Yeah, I-I just got home.'

'Oh fuck, Scarlett hasn't come home all weekend and I didn't know if you two were hanging out together, seem as your new buddy's.'

'W-What? She hasn't come home all weekend?'

'Not seen her since Friday, or even got a text really.'

I sit up straighter my breathing becoming more regular, 'A-And you have no idea, where she is?'

I don't know why I cared so much, because I don't. I'd barely class her as a friend, sure we spoke a little more than we used too. But she was one of the only people who've treated me like I'm human since I've returned back to school.

Lucas lets out an irritated sigh, 'If I knew, then I wouldn't be calling you.'

I look around frantically as I look for my jacket, I quickly grab it, 'W-Where are you? I'll come with you to help you find her.'

'I'm good thanks.'

'Stop being such an ass, your sister is missing.'

'Step-sister.' He corrects.'

I roll my eyes, 'Is now really the time?'

'No, I guess not. I'm at the park, this was the last place she told me she was going, she was meeting her fucking boyfriend here.'

My stomach clenches, a million thoughts swirl round my brain, please say what happened to me, hasn't happened to her?

Fuck.

Please say it hasn't, I don't want anyone to ever go through the pain that I have.

'I-I'm coming.' I croak out before hanging up.