ruined, but is it?

what should I do?

Playing a game for the last 5 hours, rain sucked in a deep breathe in to then bring up his hand to yawn into it, payu kept his eyes to the board to then smile.
"I win."
Rain looked down to dart his eyes.
"I think your cheating, that's the 8th time."
Payu couldn't help but to laugh.
Rain slowly looked up to eye him about to then look down, this was all still feeling very unreal.
"Again?"
Rain shook his head.
"I'm tired."
Payu nodded.
"You shouldn't stress or over work yourself."
Payu started to then place the board pieces away, rain took in a very deep breathe.
"Not trying to..... Um..... So..... There's a place across the wall there is no one in there and....."
Payu slowly looked up.
"Kicking me out?"
Rain signed.
"I don't know you."
"Rain, I've been here with you for 3 weeks, haven't done anything. Can there at least be a little trust between us?"
Rain made a face to then place his hands behind him to look payu up and down.
"Guess.... Maybe a little."
"Thank you. Also ask whatever you want, I'll answer anything. Can know me better that way."
Rain darted his eyes about to then turn his head.
"Where...... Were you when this happened?"
Payus face fell to then hang his head to look down.
Rain slowly turned his head to eye over payu to then make a face.
"Um...... You don't have to tell me."
"I was...... Celebrating my first anniversary with......mm....I really don't want to talk about that."
"You don't have to. Maybe something a bit easier. What's your favorite color?"
Payu laughed a bit.
"Green, what about yours?"
"Yellow. Mm..... What month is your birthday?"
"September, yours?"
"May. Did you have any animals growing up?"
"Oh I had quite a few, dogs, cats, fish. What about you?"
"A dog or two. Um......I don't mind asking you more questions tomorrow. I'm really tired, you should go to...."
"Rain......I..... Don't want to be alone again. Do you?"
Rain parted his lips to then look down.
"Payu.....I really don't know what to do here."
"You need to heal. I'll be too the couch like I have been. I won't do anything."
Payu got up from the floor to then go to the table to then grab the gun, rains eyes widened to tensed. Payu went to him to then sit to hand him the gun.
"I promise."
Rain gulped to then grab the gun to then get slowly up.
"Mm...."
Rain then turned to stumble to his bedroom to close the door to then lock to take in deep breathes, payu placed his hands behind him to then turn his head to look to his own bag that was by the door to eye his bright green fanny pack that held something very important to him.
Payu took in a very deep breathe to then move about to place the game board pieces away to then start to get ready for bed.
Rain was to the edge of his bed to be looking down at his gun to make a face.
Should I just go out there and....... He is a person...... An actual person......
Rain parted his lips to then take in a very deep inhale to then get up to stumble to his dresser to then place the gun away to place his forehead to it to sign.
What if..... He turns out to be like that one girl I allowed in here 6 years ago...... She was so nice then......
Rain flexed his jaw.
I...... Don't want to..... Kill again......
Rains chin started to quiver.
He then took in a very deep breathe.
Rain then moved back to sit back to the edge to place his hands to either side of himself to dart his eyes about.
What should I do? It's just a matter of time. He will want my place because it has running water and electricity, payu will... Try to kill me.
Rain started to chew at his inner cheek to get back up, to open his drawer to then gather some clothes to place the gun in it, to then move slowly to the door to open it, to then eye about.
Payu was to the edge of the couch to move the blanket about to open to then lay it down, to then take his hands to his semi tied hair to get the hair tie to then place it to his wrist to then take his hands to the bottom of his shirt to then take it over his head to then toss it to the side, rain tilted his head to look over payus back.
There is no way I would be able to take him down by strength alone, he is massive.
Payu took in a deep breathe to then dart his eyes to then turn his head to look over rain who had his door slightly open.
"Um...... Do you need something?"
Rain took in a very deep breathe to then look down at the clothes.
What payu said earlier went through his mind. About not wanting to be alone.
Payu turned a bit to raise an eye brow, he then went slowly to rain to stand before him to dart his eyes.
"Rain?"
Rain signed, he then slowly looked up to payu to then look about him.
Payu made a confused face to then turn his head to eye about, rain moved quick to take the gun to place behind him in his boxers to then raise up the clothes, payu looked back to eye down.
"Seen you've been wearing the same clothes, think these might fit you."
Payu smiled to then grab them.
"Does..... This mean I can stay?"
Rain took back his hands to step back.
"For tonight, we can talk more tomorrow. I will be keeping my door locked, if you steal anything...... I'll put a bullet in your head!"
Payu raised his eye brow to then watch rain go back to then lock the door.
Payu couldn't help but to smile a bit to then make a pain face to then look to that fanny pack again to suck in a deep inhale to then turn to go back to the couch has a promise he had given went through his mind.