ruined, but is it?

thinking of my current situation

To his sleeping bag, rain laid to his back to eye over the ceiling to have his arms wrapped about with a face.
Why do I keep having sex with payu? Is it because I lost my virginity to him? Is it because I still stupidity love him?
Rain groan a bit to turn his head to look across the way to payu who laid to his side to be fast asleep, signing rain turned his head the other way to look across to eye ruzies back.
I don't even feel anything for you ruzie but for...... Your also kind of a possessive bitch. When I first met you when we were kids, you weren't really like that, is it because of the change of the world?
Rain took in a deep breathe to turn his head to look up at the ceiling once more has he was between two people, quite literally, one he still loved the other who was starting to annoy him.
Rain flexed his jaw to close his eyes.
In three days you have to go to the leader, he wants you to confirm to everyone that you she ruzie are dating but.....I don't really want to do that, I know I'm a boy, know I need to be dating a girl but.... This one is pissing me off and the other girls here most are already in relationships, so is it the same thing then?
I'm forced to be with payu? Am I even really in love with him or is it circumstance?
Rain slowly opened his eyes to feel lost and confused once more over this current situation.
Rain gulped to turn to eye over payu.
You say you like me more then just friends or a sex buddy, but when we're together that's all we do, is have sex.
Rain signed and hard to furrow his brow, he was very much hard.
Okay fine! I like having sex with payu, really do wish he would let me have sex with him but..... Given my length, don't think that's possible. So I guess, it's not just him who is doing all the just sex thing.
Rain turned to his back once more to then place his hands to his eyes.
What the hell is wrong with me! Why did payu have to be here! If he wasn't I could be with...... However ruzie has shown me some of her personality and I don't like it but....
Rain started to whimper, his mind was going well over the place has he thought of what he should do.
He then winced has he felt something to the side of his head.
Moving a hand there, he rubbed to turn his head slightly to then look over payu who had his eyes open to have a eye brow raised..
Rain narrowed his eyes to sit up to grab a small rock to throw it to him, payu got up to eye it, has it didn't reach to then look to rain to rain an eye brow..
Rain looked over him to sign to go back down to lay to his back to wrap his arms about..
Payu couldn't help but smile with rains pouty deamoner.
Looking about, payu wanted to be with rain, he then got up to slowly go to him, hearing a noise to his side he turned his head to widen his eyes to get up to shake his head..
"No!" He whispered.
Payu rolled his eyes to then go stand right next to him to eye him over..
"Don't be like this rain."
Payu then moved down to move rains sleeping bag down, rain tried to reach for it for payu to gently smack his hands away to then go in to be hovering over to widen his eyes to look down.
"Mm.... What has gotten you hard?"
Rain darted his eyes over payu to have his hands to his chest.
"Don't get a big head over this. It's not you. Was thinking of..."
Payu slowly looked up with a long face, rains lips parted has he looked over him to sign to peer his eyes to the side.
Don't look at me like that!
Payu then placed his hard on, on rains to start to grind a bit..
Rain snapped his head forward to look up to dart his eyes.
"Payu! What are you doing! We can't here!" Rain said has quietly has he could.
Payu slowly went down to go the side of his neck to start to deliver kisses.
"Believe, we can."
Rain moved his hands to payus shoulders to grip to softly moan, he slowly turned his head to look over ruzies back to then curl his bottom lip inward to lift his head back to melt with this action.
Payu then went to his ear to nip..
"Do you.... Want more? Or we can cum this way."
"Mm.... More...."
Payu smiled and wide to move his hands down to rains boxers to pull down, has rain shuffled about the sleeping bag, to then spread his legs a bit to feel payus cock hit his outter hole.
Payu started to tease.
"Someone..... Want this deep into his...."
Rain nodded to start to breathe heavily.
Payu took his tongue out to lather rains ear to then drag a bit of a line to his neck to then kiss and nip.
"Tell me then rain.... What are you wanting me to do?"
Rain moved his hands to payus hair that was still up in his slight pony tail to grip.
"Fuck....mm.... Me...."
Payu moved up to place his hands to either side of rains body to look him over, to keep probing rains hole without going in.
"So..... You want me?"
Rain took his hands from payu to turn his head to place the back of his hand to his mouth to slowly open his eyes to give payu quite the look to take in rapid breathes.
"Yes......"
Payus lips parted to go down to place his arms under rain to then slowly go in to place his mouth to his for them to share in an incredible kiss has payu thrusted sensually into rain.
After the two were at there sides, for rain to have his eyes closed, for them to be holding hands, payu had his hand to his head to be looking down to dart his eyes to be very angry at himself, knowing the reason why.
Payu signed to move down to place his mouth to rains cheek to sorrowfully get up, rain slowly opened his eyes to turn to look over payu with tiredness..
"Payu?"
Payu started to place on his lower clothes.
"Need to go back to....."
Rain made a long face.
"Can we...... Go somewhere else to.... Sleep together?"
Payu widened his eyes to turn to look over rain to smile and wide to nod.
Rain nodded to place his boxers back on to get out of his sleeping bag for him to wrap his hand about payus wrist to pull him along.
Payu Darted his eyes to feel a warm spot in his heart that he hadent felt since his fiance.