ruined, but is it?

growing a bit fonder

Furrowing his brow, rain started to feel the bed shake a bit, he slowly opened his tired eyes to then look over the darkened ceiling to then turn his head to narrow his eyes.
Payu! You better not be doing what I think you are!
Rain then jolted up to place his hands behind him to then part his lips. Payu was the other side of the pillow wall to have his arms wrapped about himself to shake here and there has he was having that nightmare about his fiance.
Rain made a pained expression to take in a deep breathe to then grab a pillow to place to the other side to then move closer to payu to lay to his side to then bring an hand up to then stroke his arm to be at his ear.
"Payu..... It's okay.....shhh...."
Payu started to take in deep breathes has the warmth of rain started to pull him out of that hell, he then slowly opened his eyes to then dart about to have his chin quiver a bit, he then placed a hand over his eyes.
"Again?"
Rain nodded to move his hand up and down that arm to lay his head to the pillow.
"You've been having that dream for a week now."
Only reason why I have allowed you to stay to my bed this whole week.
"I'm sorry....." Payu sniffed.
Rain darted his eyes to then move payu about to have him lay to his chest to then start to stroke at his head to look up to Matt a face.
"Do not ever apologize payu......I have nightmares of when my parents......"
Rain took in a very deep breathe to then close his eyes.
"We need to sleep."
Payu moved his head up and down rains chest to then re close his eyes to smile a bit, he really liked it when rain was being like this.
"Rain?"
"Mm?"
"Thank you."
Rain couldn't help but to smile a bit to then wrap his arms about to hold tightly to him.
The next morning was very awkward, however they needed to start to plan for when they needed to start to gather food.
To the weapon room, payu sat to the corner to snap a few bullets in to then peer his eyes to rain who sat down to be placing in bullets has well to have his head hung to be concentrating on what he needed to accomplish.
Payu rolled his eyes to make a face to then look. to shake his head.
His heart was starting to skip a few beats.
You are not in love with him, your heart belongs to your fiance, rather he is alive or not. Just..... Rain does have his..... Moments..
Rain widened his eyes to then move his head up to look to payu who slapped himself and hard against the forehead.
"Payu?"
Payu shooked his head to then get up to leave.
"Think it's almost lunch."
Rain watched him go to shrug to then look back down to complete what he was doing to then place it to his lap to look it over.
Thought having payu to my bed when I'm there he would stop having these nightmares but...... He just keeps having them...... Well.... To a point.... When I..... Hold him he....ugh! That needs to stop has well!
Rain then placed the gun down to then get up to leave has well, he then went about to stop to eye over payu, he was too the stove to be making lunch to have a slight smile to be humming.
Rain darted his eyes to then place his head forward..
"Um payu?"
Payu stopped humming to then turn his head to eye him.
"Yes?"
"Tonight..... You need to sleep on the couch."
Payu parted his lips to then watch rain turn to go to his bedroom, payu signed to then look to the stove to grit his teeth to then take in a deep breathe.
This is for the best. Stay to his rules, stay celibate. Try to find that balance of being nothing but friends after everything that has happened, know I can.
Payu flexed his jaw to complete the lunch.
To his bed, a long time later, rain was under the covers with his arms wrapped about him to be eyeing up, to make a hard face, he then turned his head to eye payus empty spot to sign. He was starting to enjoy his company.
Rain shook his head to then turn to his other side to look across to eye the bathroom door opened to make a hard face. He then jolted up has he heard some weird sounds.
Rain then placed his hand to the blanket to then move it to go has quick has he could to leave his room to then eye about to then look to payu who was to the couch to be shaking and twitching, rains eyes widened to then turn his head to eye the back of his front door.
Payu is being too loud!
Rain then went to him, to sit to the edge of the couch to then place his hand to payus shoulder to start to shake.
"Payu....payu..... Your being too loud."
Payu started to breathe in heavily at what he was seeing has he did years ago, it shook him to his core.
"No!.....nn....dargo!...... No dargo!"
Rain gulped to then really start to shake.
"Payu you have to wake up!"
Payu turned from his side to his back to keep twitching and thrashing.
"Dargo!"
Rain started to breathe hard has he looked over him.
"Payu......"
Payu then started to have tears fall down.
Rain made a hard look to then place a hand over his mouth, feeling that, payu couldn't help but to then wake, since he was having trouble breathing, to then move up to push rain away a bit.
"What the!"
Rain placed his finger to his mouth.
Payu widened his eyes to then look about rain to eye the door, he then placed a hand to his forehead to look down.
"Sorry rain...... Did you hear them to the door or anything?"
Rain placed down his finger to shake his head.
"Not yet."
Payu made a pained expression.
"Rain I'm so sorry......." He chocked up a bit at the end.
Rain darted his eyes to shrug.
"This is not your fault."
Payu placed his hand down to have them both behind to keep his eyes down.
"I don't know what to do to stop dreaming like this. I will not allow this to..... Cause you any pain or harm. Can still remember when I saw you having whatever nightmares you were having."
Rains lips parted.
"You.....saw them?"
"Mm..... Just had to place my index finger between your brow to make them stop." He lightly chuckled.
Rain then started to breathe unevenly.
"You..... Did that?"
Payu nodded to then place his hand to his eyes to start to wipe away his tears.
"Mm..... Need to find out a way to make me stop having these.......nn!?"
Payu widened his eyes to look over rain with a shock and surprise. Rain had moved forward to place his mouth to his to be moving it up and down has they kissed.
Payu then placed his hands to rains chest to slowly move him away to eye over him.
"Rain.... What are you doing?"
Rain took in a very deep breathe to flex his jaw to then peer his eyes down to then move his hands to his to then start to take them away to start to lean in close again.
"Don't......ruin this."
Payu raised an eye brow to look over rain has he placed his mouth back to his to wrap his arms about.
What the hell are you thinking in that head of yours rain? Why are you doing this?
Payu darted his eyes over him to be screaming in his head to stop this but his body was not listening.
Rain moved his mouth with his to then place his hands to payus chest to then slowly take them down without much of a thought.