Not that bad // Rhea Ripley

59- Such Small Hands

" I think I saw you in my sleep, darling"

La Dispute

Here we were, Thursday. Colby was arriving this afternoon, and the concert was tonight. I felt so fucking nervous, I don't even know how it'll go tonight. I still went to train this morning and until the middle of the afternoon. I then went to the venue for soundcheck, and to help the guys with anything they'd need. Colby was putting his bags at our place, and then coming straight to the venue with Scott. I'm just realizing now that I'll see him, when he's been almost 4 months, and to add on top of that, he'll see me on stage. The last time I've been on stage with the band was in front of a small 250 people crows, not a fucking arena. Soundcheck went smooth, thanks to the rehearsals, and then we left the stage so the light techs and everything could do their jobs in peace. I followed the band to the green room, to get fresh drinks. I had my stuff to change, and would do it right before we had to go on stage. They were so famous now they even had another band opening for them, can you believe that? We were talking when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

From Colby, 5:56 p.m

" hey baby girl, we're on our way with Scott"

" can't wait to see you"

I told the guys, and they followed me so we could wait outside of the venue for them. I had planned to disappear during the break, saying I would go get a drink or something, and then sneak backstage to join the guys. We waited outside for a solid ten minutes, before I saw them approaching. And right then I couldn't help myself but run to Colby. He caught me and hugged me as tight as ever, as if he was afraid I would just disappear right then and there.

" I missed you so fucking much Roxanne." He whispered in my ear, one of his hands on my back, the other in my hair.

" I missed you too you know." I felt like crying right now. "I love you."

We separated when we heard wolf whistles and throat clearing behind us. We still kissed rapidly before joining the others. We'd have the time to be just together after. We all chatted together until it was time for the boys to go backstage since the venue was opening. We went to get placed, and got pretty close since we had early access to the venue. We waited for an hour, before Hey Violet, the opening band started. They were actually really good, really gave a good vibe. Once they finished, I tried my plan and said I was getting myself a drink. Thankfully no one questioned it nor asked me to brought one, so I could escape easily. I made myself a way out of the crowd and showed my pass to the security guard who smiled at me and let me in. I climbed the stairs and searched my way to the green room. I got changed quickly in "stage clothes" which just consisted in a heavily ripped skinny and fishnets, with a crop top. I did my hair and make up as quick and good as I could, and even managed finishing that before the techs had finished moving everything on the stage. Stress started getting harder and harder to control. Michael must have seen it, because he came and hugged me tight, telling me I'll be okay, that it's not harder than when I wrestle. Finally someone said it was our time to go, and Michael asked me to stay back, since they wanted to properly introduce me. I stayed behind the curtain, just like I do before my kind of shows, and waited fr their signal. Luke spoke first, probably since he's the frontman.

" Hello guys! How are you tonight." The crowd cheered loudly and a wave of adrenaline ruched through me. "You know, you guys tonight are one hell of a lucky crowd. We've got someone out there, she's here for only one night. If you've been following these guys before I joined, you must know her, she made a great job before she handed me the torch." Some people apparently knew who I was since they cheered my name, and that felt completely surreal. "Yeah you got it, Roxanne come on out here ."

I passed the curtain and the cheers just grew louder.

" So tonight, if you don't mind, most of the songs will be duets." Michael added and peopled screamed. Oh shit, my best friend is loved by everyone. "Now, let's start off, with the first song we ever covered." He winked at me and I took the microphone in my hands.

" I got your picture I'm coming with you."

The crowd sang the next part of the lyrics, and I moved everywhere on stage as I was singing. I went to Luke, then Calum, then Mike, and even managed to go up to Ashton. On Wherever you are, I sat with Michael on the edge of the stage as he was playing the chords on acoustic, and realized Colby was just one meter away from me, apparently still shocked. I winked at him and got up. It was an intense hour and a half, to say the least. When we finished, we went on the edge of the stage to bow. Once backstage, I hugged them all, and Ashton said he was going to get Scott and Colby backstage. Once the two of them arrived, Colby ran to me and kissed me, much like I did this morning.

" God, why would you hide from me that you have such a great voice." He breathed out.

" Well, I just never had the occasion to show you." I blushed. "But thank you."

" You were great." Scott said. "Almost as good as on the ring." He winked. "And you managed to keep it a surprise from Colby, I'm proud of you."

I stuck my tongue out at him, and we decided to go eat somewhere, and even invited Hey Violet to tag along. I got many question from their guitarist about my job and everything, since he followed the band when I was still in it. It felt great, I really didn't know people were interested in me at all. During the whole dinner I had Colby's hand on my thigh, and sometimes he would squeeze it, obviously kind of tense. I'd have to ask him about what's going on at home. Speaking of that, the two bands said they'd have to go back on the road, and hence had to leave. I hugged all of my friends, and thanked them again. I also spent time congratulating Hey Violet. We then parted ways, and Scott took his car, when I left with Colby.

" Hey, you seemed tense during dinner,." I started, judging it was better now, since we were alone, for the next 10 minutes. "Is everything alright, are you hurt ?"

" No, not at all don't worry." He chuckled. "But it's well, quite embarrassing to say."

" You know Colby, we've been together for almost a year, and even though most of that year we were apart, I still can listen to you." I smiled, my eyes darting from him to the road.

" Okay, you won't laugh ?" He made me promise. "I kind of got turned on by seeing you on that stage."

" You what ?" I said, laughing, out of nervousness.

" You said you wouldn't laugh!" He pouted. "I've been wanting to have sex with you for a while now, and since I'm pretty damn fucking horny, the smallest things turn me on. I even get turned on seeing you wrestle sometimes! I can't help it you're so damn sexy, and I'm so damn lucky."

As soon as I parked I shut him up by placing my lips on his. He deepened the kiss, his hands finding their way to the back of my neck. When I pulled away, his mouth was slightly open, his eyes, on the other hand wide open.

" Don't you think I haven't been wanting you all those months ?" I said, biting my lip.

He smirked and led me inside and to my bedroom. He closed and locked the door, pushing me on the bed and kissing me hard. He let out little grunts and moans, and even though it turned me on, we had to be quiet.

" Colby, please, Scott is here too." I whispered in his ear.

" Means we'll have to be quiet." He smirked against my neck. " I can do it, but can you handle me baby girl ?"