Shades Of Blue

33. Forget

Neel

August

Age 17

 
The bonfire was only a jumble of memories. It was unclear when Neel had blacked out, but it must have been around the time Benjie showed up. He could remember getting angry with Benjie, but he couldn't remember why. Everything after that anger was a mystery. He woke up at home on his own, and all he could think of was that he had let Benjie down. He had promised to help him through the party, but Neel got drunk and forgot instead.

Ellie let him into the Archer house. Their parents weren't home. She hadn't said anything, only side-eyed him and sucked her teeth. It was enough to know that he had displeased her.

When Neel reached Benjie's open bedroom door, he knocked softly to announce himself. He closed the door behind him, giving them the privacy they needed.

Benjie lay in bed with his back facing the door, his duvet pulled up over his head.

Neel's hand petted Benjie's back through the blanket. "Bad day?"

"Go away," Benjie said, his voice muffled by the blanket.

Ignoring this request, Neel wrapped his arms around his lover, wishing he knew how to fix him. "I can't remember much of last night. I fucked up."

"Don't touch me," Benjie mumbled, his words not quite hitting Neel's ear clearly.

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

Neel tried to pull at the blanket but was only met with resistance. "Why are you hiding?"

"Acne."

"I don't care about that," he scoffed and pulled at the blanket with more force.

Benjie pushed him away. "Don't."

"Are you pissed about last night? Like I said, I fucked up."

"No."

"Really?" Neel pressed, setting his hand down on Benjie's calf. "It feels like we got in a fight or something."

"You were drunk, that's all."

"I don't believe you," Neel confessed. "Can you just come out and talk to me?"

With a bothered sigh, Benjie finally emerged from his blanket cave to reveal a swollen black eye, a bruised jaw, and a cut across the bridge of his nose.

A shaky breath escaped Neel's lips before he pulled his partner close, enveloping him in his invisible protective bubble. "What happened?"

Hanging his head low, Benjie lifted his shoulders in a shrug. "Same as always." He winced when Neel tried to touch his face.

"Sorry."

Benjie rested his head on Neel's shoulder, his heart heavy. He didn't speak, but Neel could sense that his lover had a lot to say. He just wouldn't say it.