Whiskey River, Drown my Soul

Chapter Forty-Nine

The anniversary of Drew's birth and death on Thursday was as painful as it typically was, but with the added grief of Brad AND Rev still lingering in my heart, the pain of that day was nearly as overwhelming as the first year had been.

My poor Steve didn't fare any better. In fact, he seemed to be coping worse than me. He had lost his brother Brad, in more ways than one, a friend in Rev, and his entire family as he knew it.

Steve had continued to stay with Steph until Thursday. He claimed she needed him but I also knew he didn't enjoy being in my house. That was a constant reminder of his wife and my husband.

Thursday morning, he showed up already tearful, and we simply held each other and cried periodically for at least an hour while my dear Ip waited patiently to be useful in some way.

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Paige had been clinging to him since Rev died. She wasn't okay with him being out of her sight for long. He knew why but it also made him nervous. Right now he was sick to the very pit of his soul, and he figured she was, too, but he was anticipating her being ready to move on with him sooner than she should be. Using him to get over the loss, so to speak. He hoped he was wrong about that, but knowing Paige like he did, he was pretty sure that was going to happen.

Thursday was brutal to watch. He could almost feel the pain Steve and Paige were experiencing himself. They were both okay with him tagging along to the gravesite, and that was harder than he expected it to be...for himself, that is. He hadn't even known Paige pregnant but picturing that little baby buried beneath his feet nearly did him in. He assumed the compiling grief and stress from the week might have had something to do with it, but maybe not. He had always been particularly in-tune with Paige's emotions. He could have simply been feeding off of her. She held Steve's hand and rested her head on Ip's shoulder as she shivered and cried in the twenty degree air.

Eventually she had enough and started back to her Jeep. As Ip drove them into her driveway, Steve announced, "Hun, I wanna leave. Are you okay without me?"

Paige turned in her seat to view Steve in the back.

"I'll be fine with Ip here but where are you headed? I want you to be okay".

"I'm gonna head to Steph's. I told her 'bout everythin' goin' on and she said I should come back over today. Your house is hard on me, hun".

"Oh, honey, I know", Paige said sympathetically. "I don't like it, either. If Steph can accommodate you, that's where I think you should be. You can help her while letting her think she's helping you. Well, she is, but...you know what I mean".

"Yep".

After Steve left, Ip simply plopped down onto a couch, emotionally and physically exhausted, wrapped Paige in his arms when she came over to him, and fell asleep.

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Steve was easy to talk to. He was a great listener and he genuinely opened up about his own life without her having to pry too much. That was hard to find in any man.

Steph was an excellent detective because she was naturally inquisitive and didn't stop digging until she had all of her questions satisfied. Most men got annoyed or offended with that but Steve seemed insufferably patient.

By Wednesday Steph didn't mind his help as much because she wasn't needing it as much, and because she felt like she knew his character enough to know he literally would be helping anyone in her situation, not because he was trying to sleep with her or anything shady like that.