A Starting Point

CHAPTER FORTY EIGHT - THE SADNESS OF CIELO

Heloyse

At this point in my life, I could call myself the loneliest person on earth. Dead family, a dead friend and a boyfriend who lived far in his past.
The days passed quickly and Cielo pretended to be strong.
She cried at night when no one else saw her. And through the days, she didn't cry. I admired her for that. For being able to pretend, because deep down, I knew how much she was suffering.
After a few days, I came to the conclusion that she was starting to worry me. Suppliers were paid and cattle feed was purchased. She was focused on getting money to repair the farm.
Will even tried to help. She was like Thom. Sometimes, she let her pride get the better of her.
I offered to sleep over at the Ferrel house and keep her company and she said she wanted to be alone for a while.
I went into town to meet Mr. Lee. He owned a business that was closed. I met him at Thom's wake.
The point was big. A hall with huge windows where I would place the tables and counters. At the bottom, the kitchen was very nice and spacious.
There would be my new coffee shop.

***

- You are leaving me?
“No, that's not it.
"How not?" You said you'd be back. Suddenly you start living there, saying it's just for a while. He falls in love, gets attached to people and now tells me he's going to open a coffee shop. And how am I? Why don't you just say you're not coming back? Finish it off with me!
Ashley was right. I wouldn't go back to live in Boston, however, and I couldn't bring myself to tell her that.
“Maybe I can't tell you because my best friend lives in Boston and I'm going to miss her so much.
“Then you more than ever should tell her that.
“And I will.
“Oh my God, no more third-person talk. Just say you're not coming back.
“I'm so sorry, Ashley. But once everything is in place, I'll go see her. Promise! Or rather, why don't you come and live here in Clearwater? You could be my partner. You know I've always wanted this.
“That's tempting. But, I spent many years here. I don't see myself anywhere else. Maybe one day.
- He is sure? Even if I tell you that there are wonderful places here? And then there are the other cities. You would love Houston. There's the Saint Arnold Brewing Company(13).
- Oh damn! I love this beer. It was the best I've ever tasted.
- So come here. I buy several for you.
"And would you get me a cowboy kitty too?"
—Well, they already take care of their cows. They don't need one more.
Ashley's laugh was her trademark. Outrageously good to hear.
— The friends... I mean... The cows beware. If I go to Clearwater, I'm going to need a cowboy to take care of me.
— There's no shortage of cowboys here. Looks like they came out of a movie.
- I imagine.
"Well..." I said after a moment. "I hope you'll think about my proposal."
- I am going to think. And you, when do you come to sort things out here?
“After I open the coffee shop. I need to hire some people. I'm still going to buy the counters, the tables...
- I hope it all right.
- Me too.
“Lisy?
- I am here.
“I want you to be happy there or anywhere. And if something happens and you need someone, I'll be here, okay? Promise you'll let me help you?
- Promise.
- That's nice. I love you.
“I love you too.
“Mom misses you and Aunt Ellen said to send you a kiss.
"Tell her I'll send another one." And tell your mother I'll come see her soon.
- I will say. And take care.
- You too.

***

Mr. Lee had given me a pen to sign the paperwork. I signed with joy at the same time that sadness invaded me.
Thom would be happy if he was here with me. I wish he was.
"Good luck, miss," he said, squeezing my hand.
- Thanks.
He left and I was left alone in that big empty hall.
I was starting a new life. Thom's life and that of my family ended here. Mine continued. They were important and perfect chapters in my story and I needed to write the rest of my life, even with all that pain.
I had to move on. I had a new relationship, new people around me and that was good.
Will came in with two bags of our lunch. We had lunch right there, sitting on the floor while we talked about the repairs I would need to do there.
I looked at the guitar leaning against the wall and smiled.
— And where did you go with that guitar, cowboy?
"Don't tell me you've been serenading around."
He smiled.
— My grandfather gave it to me as a present. I had his arm fixed.
- Know. I wonder why I've never seen him play.
"Is this an invitation, miss?"
I nodded.
He got up, picked it up, and sat down on the floor again, cross-legged.
She was wearing a brown plaid shirt, light blue jeans and brown boots. Her hair was tied up and behind her ears.
It was fascinating to see him like this.
"And what are you going to sing for me, Mr. O'Connor?"
—You Got What I Need, Joshua Radin(14).
Then Will started to sing and I swear that in all my life, I will never forget.