Spider Monkey

Chapter Fifty - Six - Gloomy Days

Daryl and Carol buried Merle in Alexandria.

The day was grey and a cloud of grief and sadness hung over the entire town. Daryl cried tears for not only his brother but for Glenn, Abraham... and Hedley. He didn't know if his son was okay or even alive. All he knew was he was not with him. Snatched away and Daryl couldn't do anything but watch them do it.

Once Merle was covered and rested, the two just bowed their heads, staring into the dirt.

"'ere." Daryl muttered, giving Carol something silver, "Merle would want you to have them."

Carol looked at what Daryl gave her and coked on a sob. They were Merle's dog tags.

She cradled them to her chest, "Thank you."

Daryl pulled her into a hug and they held onto each other desperately as they cried.

"He made me feel safe again." Carol spoke into his shoulder, hiccupping, "A-After Ed, Sophia... everything. I thought I'd never feel safe again but- but he made me feel safe."

Daryl squeezed her.

"He was an asshole." She said, making them both chuckle wetly. "But I loved him."

"He loved you so much, Carol." Daryl whispered, "I've never seen him in love before you."

She sniffled, "He loved you and Hedley too. That boy of yours changed him into the man he grew to be."

Daryl's tears grew heavier when he thought of Hedley. Carol noticed, pulling back to wipe the water from the Dixon's cheeks.

"We'll get him back." She promised.

But Daryl was losing hope, shaking his head. "How?"

Carol didn't have an answer. Instead, she hugged him once more, the two letting it all out in the embrace.

****

Carl was sitting in Hedley's room, staring at the stuff around him as he held onto Rosie the Millipede. Everything in Hedley's room triggered a memory of the two of them.

A cat skull that sat on a shelf reminded Carl of the day Hedley found said skull in the woods while hunting and was so excited that it still had all of its teeth. Carl helped him clean it with an old toothbrush.

A feather taped to the wall. The browns, yellows and whites swirl together beautifully. Carl found the feather while taking Judith for a stroll through town. It gave it to Hedley as a gift and Hedley jumped up and down with joy when seeing it. It made Carl so happy seeing his excitement.

Photos of the entire group taped crookedly on the walls. Memories and people, all staring at Carl in black and white. One of the photos was of Hedley and Merle. They were sitting on the porch, laughing. Carl took the picture. It was one of Hedley's favourites.

Carl sighed, putting Rosie back in her tank and watched her climb for a bit before laying down on his back, staring up at the ceiling. He's never been away from Hedley this long. Not since the separation at the prison. But this time it felt... different.

Back then, he of course missed Hedley ... but his mind was almost always occupied with surviving the open road. Now... he was in Alexandria. He could relax and be. And that was so much worse as now, every single second, he thought about Hedley. Where he was, what he was doing... if he was okay.

He slid his head to the side and gazed at Hedley's makeshift bed. Carl grabbed hold of the blanket nearest and tugged it over. It was soft, a deep green. He brought the blanket to his face and inhaled. It smelled just like him. Grass after a storm. Rich earth and wet bark.