"You can let it go
You can throw a party full of everyone you know
And not invite your family, 'cause they never showed you love
You don't have to be sorry for leaving and growing up"
When 20 year old Matilda moved down to London after growing up qu...
AN: This chapter has a little smut in for my Ramadan friends <3
3/10/17
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Matilda
It's funny how life can work like a rollercoster. Like one minute everything could be the worst it could possibly be then as if you have blinked it can be the best it ever has been. For the last 20 years that's how my life has gone. It was the best it could possibly be. I had everything: a dad, a mum but also a baby sister on the way, I couldn’t ask for anything more. Then after being the happiest it had been my dad left and I had to take care of my little sister from the age 10 onwards as my mum turned towards alcohol. We had the best time but we always had my mum on the side not doing anything to help out. I did everything. While other teenagers my age were out having fun with their friends I was stuck looking after my baby sister and keeping the house tidy. I don't understand how we still had a roof over our heads as my mum didn’t have a job, my dad left and we didn’t have any family around to support us.
It all was too much for me as when I moved down to London I felt guilty for leaving and growing up on my own. I felt guilty that I left my 16 year old sister in the same position I was, doing everything on her own and having no one around to help. After moving to London I've had the best time. I have made friends that have helped me since I got there. They know the secrets that nobody else knows like how I overdosed a few weeks after I arrived or the amount of times they used to sit in a shower with me from how low I was. They found me in a bath full of scorching hot water but also freezing cold at points but still they were there for me. They held me when I needed someone.
At this point in my life I'm at the top. Everything is perfect. If I told myself 2 years ago that I was in bed with a man that treats me like a princess I wouldn’t believe you. He has made my life better eversince we met. That night on the roof will always be my favrioute. The only downside is the scary part about him leaving. No matter how hard I keep not thinking about it’s always in the back of my mind. How could I not think he will because everyone leaves at some point whether that is 1 year, 12 years or just 1 month after you have met them. He's what I live for and if he leaves then I leave and no one has me. I’m just afraid of the thought of telling him my past that he would look at me with pity. I don’t need that. I have left and it's time I started my own family who will always show me love.
“Hey baby what's going on in that pretty head of yours” I hear Harry grumble in his morning voice pulling me closer to him. I feel him place kisses on my jaw which makes me hum in satisfaction.
“What are we Harry?” I ask anxiously not wanting to have read the whole situation wrong.
“What do you mean love?” I feel him sit up putting all his weight onto his right arm while looking at me beside him.
“Like what are we label wise” I can see him looking at me confused. Why is it so hard explaining something?
“Well what do you want us to be?” He says while gliding a piece of hair behind my ear.
