The Diary of a "Happy" Girl

Entry No. 76

Saturday, 23rd May 2015 - 5:00pm

Today was nice. A little too warm for my likings, but nice nonetheless.

I played hockey. We won, but I could've played better, could've done more.

My best friend and his brother watched me play. I was being awkward, which made things a little weird between us. I'm sensitive to tension, so I felt like I could cut through the tension between us with a knife. But I don't know if it was noticeable.

Two fellow hockey players and myself taught them some basic stuff. They're better than me, and I've been playing for three years!

But this afternoon was nice. Mucked around with the most important people in my life, got closer with another guy who plays hockey (not on my team though) and got sympathy from one of my closest hockey friends.

I think of them all as my hockey family. They accept me, care about me, involve me in decisions, encourage me to keep trying, congratulate me when I achieve. They treat me better than my own family does (well, at least the ones I live with) and it's great.

Because I feel like I actually belong. They actually welcome me with open arms every week.

So maybe that's why I keep going back.. Despite my suckiness in the actual game, they actually give a shit.

And as much as I try to deny it, I like it. I like that they care. It feels good.

I wish hockey was everyday.