Forever Lost

Chapter 13

The song Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri starts to play. Oh, how the tables have turned back on him. I shut my eyes and feel his touch on my burning body. "I learned to live, half alive. And now you want me one more time." I open my eyes and he's staring at me as if he's mesmerised.
He screws his face up in pain as he hears the lyrics. "And who do you think you are? Runnin' 'round leaving scars."
"Ri," he whispers. "Don't," he continues to screw his face up. He has to know how much he hurt me.
"Don't come back for me," his lips claim mine and I'm too lost to stop him. His lips are demanding as his tongue demands access.
"It's so fucking hot when you sing but I don't want to hear those words," he says breathlessly before his lips claim mine again. His hands fumble with the belt to my coat and he slides the coat off my shoulders and I shake it off my arms.
Once the coat is discarded I grab his face in my hands. His hands grasp the bottom of my hoodie and he lifts it over my head.
He doesn't kiss me straight away. He looks from my waist to my head, up and down. He pulls my top over my head leaving me in my bra.
I look away from him, disgusted of how my body looks. I love this little one but he's ruining my body. Flynn grabs my jaw and makes me look at him. "So beautiful, don't ever hide from me. I'm already hard looking at you."
He gently kisses my lips again and I deepen the kiss. I need to be closer to him, I need him to put this fire out, it's been way too long. There's a knock on the window and Flynn groans.
I pull away from him and we see Tyler looking into the car at us. "Can you not do it in my car please," he calls through the window. I climb off Flynn and I wipe my lips with my hand. Fuck!
Flynn gets out the car and I pick up my top and slide it on. "Bad timing bro! I was getting through to her," Flynn snaps angrily. He's like a bloody Rottweiler.
Tyler laughs, "Oh, it looks like you were in to me," he continues to laugh. I roll my eyes, I flex my neck trying to find some sort of release. I pull on my Hoodie and I stay sitting in the car.
"If you've fucked this up I'll--"
"You'll what?" Tyler laughs. "We're going, bro. Your sister will be here any second. They were getting ice cream." Flynn puts Miley's seat in the back again sulking as he goes. I slide into the middle seat as Ruby gets into the front.
"Sorry," she says sheepishly.
"Don't be, it was a mistake," I mutter and she looks at me. "I told you, we aren't getting back together but he has this control when he's close. He consumes me, I guess I'm glad you turned up when you did."
"Mommy," Miley says and Flynn lifts her into her seat. "We got you ice cream," she beams. She has two cones in her hands. They are dripping everywhere. I strap her in and she holds the mint one out for me.
"Thank you, baby, make sure it doesn't drip on Uncle Tyler's car, he will scream like a girl," she laughs loudly but licks her ice cream. I start to eat mine and it tastes so good. Flynn slides in next to me. He does up my seatbelt and his own and he places his hand on my leg driving me insane.
"Are you going to share?" he asks me. I smile slyly and scoop some on my finger and slide it into his mouth. As he sucks my finger it makes my sex throb and makes my tummy tingle. Man, I need some sort of relief.
Not that I've pleasured myself on my own before. Would I be able to climax? Maybe I should try. I need something. His eyes dilate and I remove my finger. "Tasty," he says.
Tyler starts the car and pulls away. I look at Flynn whilst I lick my ice cream and he tightens his grip on my leg. I smirk and I stroke his knee and his body jumps. He grabs my hand so I can't do it again. Spoil sport. He's just no fun.
He leans towards my ear, "I'm going to fuck you really hard tonight for that," he whispers sending goosebumps down my spine.
"Don't count on it," I whisper breathlessly. I cross my legs but he keeps his hand firmly on my leg. Once we are home we clamber out the car.
"Honey, go have a bath. Not too hot though, Lee," I nod and I turn when I get to the front door.
"Ty, don't forget my dog," he frowns at me and then nods. He opens the boot and Rex runs to me. I enter the house and start walking up the stairs.
The back pain has eased slightly though, whether that's the painkillers or Flynn I don't know.
I head to the bathroom and I lock the door. I run the bath and the door handle moves. "Ri, let me in."
"No!" I call.
"I'm not mad, just open the door."
"I don't care if you're mad!" I'd rather him be mad right now than what he's probably feeling. I hear him sigh.
"Just open the door, Ri, I promise I won't touch you," I walk to the door and unlock it. I used to wish he would call me Ri but now I'm not sure. He uses it so often as he did before but how many times can I tell him I can't do this?
He opens the door and walks in. He locks it behind him and I pull the Hoodie and top over my head.
He walks towards me and I hold my breath. He bypasses me and turns the taps off. He checks the temperature and adds more cold water. I slide my shoes off as I shimmy my leggins and panties down.
Once he deems the temperature safe he turns the tap off. I unclasp my bra and let it fall to the floor.
He helps me into the bath and I lay back. He smirks, "I was so close," he whispers.
"Too bad Tyler is a cockblocker. I'll just have to work harder," I say without looking at him.
"Ri, you teased me. There's a part of you that wants me."
I look him dead in the eye, "And there's a part of me that wants Jason Momoa but you don't see that happening." He glares at me and I smile.
"Your little games will backfire on you sooner or later." He grabs the washcloth and starts to wash me. "And I'll be here waiting when it happens."
"Not in this lifetime."
"We will see," he shrugs concentrating on cleaning my body.
Once he's done he washes my hair. I don't know if I can handle dinner. I'm shattered already. He lifts me out of the bath when he's done. He sets me on my feet and wraps me in a towel. He lifts me up again and carries me out of the room.
He lowers me on to his bed and I curl up on my side. I shut my eyes and I pull him to lay in front of me. He places his hand on my back and everything eases. I'm too tired, I bury my face in his neck. "Don't leave me," I whisper.
"I won't," he promises.
"I followed you," I confess.
"What?" he asks but I'm too far gone to reply. Sleep overpowers me.
I wake to Flynn peppering kisses on my face and I groan. "I let you sleep for as long as possible. We are leaving soon."
"I want to sleep," I mumble.
"I know baby," he sits me up and I groan. "Your Mom bought you a dress to wear." I open my eyes and on the bed next to me is a white lace dress.
"I ain't wearing that," I protest.
"You're going to look fucking hot. Don't sweat this."
"I haven't worn white for a long time. Besides, I haven't worn anything other than a hoodie in so long."
"It's about time you start showing off my baby." I roll my eyes. He pulls the towel away from my body and he helps me into the dress.
He shimmies white panties up my legs and I have to stand for him to slide them into place. I sit back down and cross my legs. He reaches across to his desk, "I'd rather you didn't but I know you'll want to. Hurry up, we're leaving soon."
I smile and start applying the makeup as he leaves the room. I brush my hair once I've applied the heavy makeup and darker eyes to match my hair and my soul.
I stand up and inspect how bad this dress is. It's a solid white lace fitted dress with an off-shoulder and short sleeves.
Hell! It would be nice if it was any other colour! I look like a bloody bride in white even though it's above the knee. There's a knock on the door, and I let them come in. Mom walks in with some shoes. "Oh Honey, you look stunning!" she gushes and I roll my eyes. "Don't go so dark on the makeup next time though."
"I like dark it, matches my soul."
"Anyway," she says completely ignoring my comment. "I bought you some shoes to go with your dress. Heels would go better with the dress but if you have backache then flats it is." I frown, I could have managed in heels. She passes me the shoes and she holds her hands out, "Can I?" I drop the shoes on the floor and I slide them on.
"Do you have to?"
"Well, no but I'd like to," I roll my eyes and nod. She eagerly holds my baby bump. "He's a little wriggler isn't he?" she beams. This is nothing compared to how he moves in the morning. "You'd be a beautiful bride, white suits you."
"I ain't getting married. If I did I'd wear black."
"Flynn would never let you wear black to your wedding."
"Lucky I'd never marry him then," I snap and she removes her hands from my bump.
"If he asked you would you say yes?" she asks. Yes.
"Nope," I roll my eyes and she frowns. I leave Flynn's room and walk downstairs. Ruby squeals at me when she sees me. She runs towards me and touches my bump.
"It's making my broody," she says as I cup her hands.
"Well, have this one then." I roll my eyes. "I'm not particularly fond of the father," Flynn glares at me. "Good, luck bro, next thing you know you'll be a father."
"Fuck no!" he groans and Ruby looks sad. Ruby takes her hands off me. I can see the pain in her eyes.
"Can you not swear in front of my daughter?" I growl. "Besides, if you love Ruby you'll have to. Why should she stay in a dead-end relationship? Maybe she will meet another guy who's better and want kids."
There's not much better than my brother. He's protective, loving and thoughtful.
"Hell no!" he growls. "She's mine." God, he sounds like Flynn. Is it a man thing or just because they're both quite dominant?
"Not if you can't give her what she wants," Ruby blushes. I doubt Ruby would leave because of that. She's too nice to say anything. She'd live in misery in fear of upsetting someone.
"Would you have left Flynn if he didn't want kids?" He's agitated, trying to get a rise out of me. He won't get one.
"No, because I thought I couldn't have kids. I would have left him though if he wanted kids and I couldn't give it to him. That's what love is bro, give and take. Sacrifice, think about that!" I urge and Ruby kisses my cheek. Tyler stands up and pulls Ruby to his body and kisses her and I gag.
I guess Tyler would never know what I did for Flynn. I let him go for him to be happy. I doubt he'd do the same for Ruby. He'd fight for her. Whereas, Flynn gave up so easily.
I back away cringing at the PDA. "Are we ready guys?" Mom asks. Mom holds her black coat out to me and I shrug it on. It's even baggier than it was last time despite my bump. I do the belt up and Flynn holds my hand.
He leans down and whispers in my ear, "Yep, I was right you look fucking hot. I will be peeling it off you later."
"Maybe, doesn't mean I'll let you follow through." I wink at him and he glares at me.
We walk outside and the sun is going down and it's starting to get dark. I slide in the back of Tyler's car and I strap Miley in. I do up my belt and it keeps rubbing on my neck these days. So annoying.
When we are all belted in Tyler sets off. I wonder who the friends are this time. I watch the road as Tyler drives.
He dominantly places his hand on Ruby's thigh and I smirk. I think I gave him something to think about. He hasn't been the most natural Uncle but he's got the hang of it pretty quickly.
When we get to the hotel Flynn takes my hand and I hold Miley's. We are greeted at the door as usual and we are escorted to our table.
I laugh when I see the friends. Flynn looks at me and frowns. Tate looks at me but it takes him a while to recognise me. He stands up and blushes. "Who the fuck is that?" Flynn growls.
"This will be fun," I giggle. Couldn't have had better company if I'm honest.
"Don't make me jealous, Ri. Who the fuck is it?" I look at him with nothing but amusement.
"Do you remember Tate? From the mall?"
"Oh hell no! The one that pursued you and you almost let him?" I roll my eyes and we reach the table. I didn't almost let him. Tate comes towards me and kisses my cheek.
"I can't believe we are meeting again. I like your hair by the way," Tate says and he holds his hand out for me to sit. I take my cue and sit down.
I look around the table and his sister and presumably parents are here. Ade comes around to hug me.
"What did you do to your hair again? Did you not like what I did?" she looks hurt.
"I loved what you did at the time. This is me now." She releases me and frowns. "Besides it's too late now."
"Why is it? I can try reverse the damage anytime." I stand up and I undo the belt of the coat and I slide it off my shoulders. "Oh my god, sweetheart!" She hugs me again and I roll my eyes. "Did you know it's still classed as safe as long as precautions are made? Just let me know," well, I'm not planning to change back. She releases me and goes to sit down.
"Did you have a good Christmas? I looked for you at the fair but I didn't see you and then there were emergency vehicles which caused mayhem."
"Yeah I know, you know I said the ghost, yet to come? Yeah, that was me, I was the one that needed the emergency services."
He laughs and Flynn's eyes are burning me. I peek at him and he's glaring at me. "Christ, what did you do?"
"My ex decided to hold me at gunpoint and pull me over a railing." I shrug.
"Christ, are you okay?"
"I'm still here aren't I?" Miley climbs on my lap and hugs me. "You okay honey?"
"Flynn is talking to a strange girl," she whimpers. I look at him and he's talking to Bex.
"Is he your Dad?" Tate asks Miley and I laugh. "That strange girl is my sister."
Miley doesn't reply. "No, definitely not!" I laugh and I notice Flynn glaring again as he talks to Bex. "Flynn is her brother."
"Oh, I see," he smiles. He probably doesn't see. I never mentioned I adopted Miley. He probably thinks this family dynamic is weird.
"Can I get you some drinks?" the waiter asks.
"Bottle of your finest champagne and some water please," Dad asks.
"And a Pepsi," I add.
"No, Lee, no caffeine," he says and I roll my eyes. "Have 7up free, she will have that." The waiter walks away before I can protest. Can't even have any alcohol or Pepsi. I glance at Flynn and he's in deep conversation with Bex.
"How are you settling in?" I ask Tate. I can do small talk, if I must.
"Yeah, okay. It's better than I expected. I haven't seen you in a long time and it's a small town."
"I live at Duke, I was kidnapped to be here. I'm held here against my will," I say loud enough for all to hear. "So if you feel so inclined to rescue me."
He laughs hysterically and I join him. "Operation rescue the beautiful girl," he says still laughing.
"Honey, I need the bathroom. Do you need to go?" she shakes her head and I stand up.
I lower her onto my chair and I walk to the bathroom. I go to the loo and I look at the sink as I wash my hands. This is where Flynn fucked me into submission and it was very pleasurable. Hell! All these memories are why I didn't want to come back here.
I leave the bathroom and I pick Miley up and sit back down with her on my lap. Our drinks have arrived and we've started to order. "Lee, what do you want to eat?" Dad asks.
I look at the waiter, "You have pizza right?"
"Sure, what flavour?"
"Cheese, and you do Jelly?" I ask. He types it on the screen.
"Sure, you want that as dessert?"
"Nope, I want that as a main together. Then I want pickles and mint ice cream," Tate laughs and the waiter frowns.
"Um, that's not on the menu Miss Blake," he says awkwardly. He scratches the back of his head as he tries not to look me in the eye.
"Who cares? You do them both separately so you can put it together. I can make it myself, if it's an issue." We own the hotel after all.
"I'll see what I can do," he flusters.
"Honey, what do you want?" I ask Miley.
"Pasta please," she whispers.
"And pasta for my daughter please." He nods and takes everyone else's order. See I can be nice.
I look at Flynn and Bex places her hand on his on the table and he doesn't withdraw. My blood is actually boiling with rage. He leans into her slightly as she plays with her hair.
I pick up a glass of water and take a sip. I slam it back on the table and it topples over in their direction. Oops. Bex squeals and jumps up. Flynn cocks his head at me for a moment and then he starts cleaning the water up.
Once the water has been wiped up we all talk amongst ourselves until our food arrives. I take a bite of my pizza and scoop up some jelly and stuff my face. I start chewing and I mutter my appreciation. "Preggo cravings?" Tate asks.
"Yup, my little munchkin doesn't let me eat food I like. He makes me eat manky food that I never used to like." I stuff my face again. I glance at Flynn again and he grabs a napkin and reaches over and dabs Bex's lip to wipe food away. He's fucking me off on purpose. I push my food away. I've lost my appetite.
"Lee, keep eating," Mom pleads. "You've hardly touched it."
"No, I'm good! I'd like to go home!" I growl.
"We will, after the meal."
"No, I mean my home Abigail!" she sighs loudly.
"Calm down, sis," Tyler groans.
"I ain't your sis!" I hold my head in frustration. "You want to get out of here?" I say to Tate.
"Sure," he shrugs.
"You aren't going anywhere, Ri," Flynn warns.
"You can't tell me what to do!"
Tate takes my hand and stands up, "If you lay another hand on my girlfriend I'll remove it," Tate hastily withdraws his hand. "That's what I thought."
"Boyfriend?" he gasps.
"He's not my boyfriend. He's nothing to me," I growl.
"He is or he isn't?" he asks for clarification.
"Is!" Flynn growls.
"Isn't!"
"Calm it," Tyler warns. "They are a thing, end of," Tate sits back down and continues his meal. Flynn gets up and heads to the bathroom. No! You know what, I am livid.
I have a right to be. I stand up and set Miley on my chair. I head to the bathroom, I walk into the men's bathroom.
A guy comes towards the sink, "Hey! get out of here!" he growls at me. Does he think he can scare me? Bitch please, I invented scary.
I square up to him, "You get out of here! You want to fight with a pregnant woman? Because I have no qualms making sure you can't get hard again!" he holds his hands up, eyes wide and backs away out of the bathroom.
"Riley?" Flynn says as he finishes weeing at the far urinal. "What the fuck are you doing?" he does up his jeans and walks over to me.
"What am I doing? What the fuck were you doing?" he frowns at me not comprehending. I walk to the door and lock it after I do a quick sweep of the bathroom. "You think it's okay to flirt with her after you say you want me back?"
"Ri," he whispers.
"Shut up," I shout. I hastily pull open his jeans and slide them down with his boxers. I pull him towards me and I jump up onto the sink. "You need to fuck me, right fucking now or I'm done."
"No, not unless you let me in."
"Fuck me or leave me, your choice," I growl. He frowns thinking it over. "Fine, as I thought," I slide off the counter but he grabs my hips and lifts me back onto the counter. He kisses me hard as he cups my breast.
"Your wish is my command, baby. Spread your legs," I do as he says and he shimmies my dress up. He pulls my panties over and he slides into me and I groan. "Yes," he hisses. "There's no going back now baby." He makes a delicious rhythm as he crushes my lips with his. "You.Are.Mine," he says between each kiss.
I move his lips to my neck. "For right now," I admit.
"No," he growls. "Forever," I throw my head back and he kisses my neck. "I only want you, baby. I was only playing your game, you are quite the green-eyed monster. Fucking, hot. . . " he pants.
"Flynn," I mewl as I come apart. He gives me a hickey and I groan, tilting my head to the side giving him better access.
My body responds as it only knows how. I arch my back and he holds my lower back to support me. I screw my eyes shut as the orgasm rips me apart.
"I can never get enough of you," he pants. He tugs my hair and I moan. He bites my lower lip and sucks it as he releases it.
My body is building again already. I open my eyes and I cup his face and our gaze locks. It's so much more intimate this way. All our secrets and insecurities on show. "I love you so much. I promise to never hurt you again."
"You can't promise that."
"Well, I promise to never leave you, I promise to never cheat on you. To love you until my last breath."
A tear escapes my eye, "Don't talk about dying," I cringe. "It's too painful, you die, I die," I admit and he picks up the rhythm.
His eyes continue to bore into me. If this was anyone else I'd be shying away. I'd never be this confident with anyone else. He rests his forehead on mine.
"Riley," he growls as he pours into me and his pulsing sends me over the edge again. He stills and we catch our breaths.
He kisses my lips and pulls out of me. He lifts his jeans up and does them back up. He helps me off the counter, "You feeling okay? I wasn't too rough, was I?"
"It's fine, Flynn. I'm not as fragile as you think," I straighten my dress and he takes my hand. He leads me out of the bathroom and back to the table.
"Will you switch seats with me?" Flynn asks Tate and he grudgingly swaps with Flynn. I lift Miley up and sit down.
"What is that?" Tyler says and leans over to touch my neck. I swat his hand away. "Did you get lucky bro?"
"Tyler, stop," I growl. I do not want to discuss my sex life with my brother. Or with anyone else for that matter.
"What? Did he not settle your needs? Are you pissed he ambushed you?" Settle my needs? He bloody incinerated my needs.
"Bro, she ambushed me! Nearly castrated a guy in her way!" Tyler laughs hysterically and I slap his head. "Hormones!"
"Man, if pregnancy does that then maybe impregnating Ruby won't be so bad."
"Such a romantic," I roll my eyes. I lean around Tyler, "Why are you with my brother again?" She smiles shyly and I giggle.