Forever Lost

Chapter 19

"The redhead was always so clingy but he only had one goal. To fuck her. She was easy to him as she was literally throwing herself at him. He didn't have to try. He even forgot she was with him on the way to the frat house. Kegg challenge? More endless hardons. He thought she'd choose a sexual favour in return but no, more booze. Did nothing else matter to the girl other than endless booze?
   "How high was her tolerance after all that? It didn't even effect her. She then punches a guy in the face and he was anxious that she'd get hurt. Why did she care if the guy was shouting at his girlfriend? He didn't even think she'd protect her family let alone a stranger. He felt rage that he called the Angel a fucking bitch. Luckily Tyler knocked him out because he would have done worse. He dragged him out of the house and threatened for him to never come back.
   "How did she know the guy abused his girlfriend? Why was it her problem? At least she could throw a good punch and protect herself. When he returned she was gone. Another guys bed. He took the red head to bed," I cringe. Why do I want to hear this? But he carries on talking. "She was really awkward. She was very inexperienced. What did it matter to him? He took control, he only wanted to fuck her. She requested light off and he was happy with that.
    "He tried to shut the Angel out of his head. He thought if he fucked the redhead then he'd get Tyler's sister out of his head. He was hard because of the Angel, not the redhead. Condom. Always. That was his motto. He saw no kids in his future. His cock was rock hard because of the Angel. It was actually uncomfortable. He flipped her on her stomach. He didn't want to see her face. What did he want to see?
     "He was so far away that he didn't even try to please the girl in his bed. He climaxed and she was left frustrated but he didn't care. She fell asleep in his bed and he examined her face and there was nothing. No spooning was another one of his rules. He could fuck them and they could sleep but never cuddle. Who needed to do that shit? He woke to Tyler's sister screaming.
   "He went to her room but it was locked. He put his hand on her door. He felt helpless, he knew he could help but she was blocking him out. He returned to his room but he couldn't sleep until her screams stopped. He got ready for uni and left the girl in his bed without a second thought. He found the Angel coming back from a run that early. She had the audacity to ask him who he was again.
    "He had endless hardons and she couldn't remember his name! Unacceptable. In fact, he was left frustrated that she hadn't thrown herself at him as Tyler warned. She had sex with literally every other fucker but not him. He followed the same routine for weeks. Stalking the girl just watching. The redhead grew more clingy and he was close to calling it off. He only slept with her when the Angel consumed his mind. It got to the point where he couldn't get hard anymore. Only she could do that and she wasn't even aware." I smirk. Interesting.
   "The way she went through life accepting no help. She looked dead to the world. It got to the point where watching her in the sidelines wasn't enough for him. He had to talk to her, get her to open up to him as Tyler was no help. The way she flipped out about going home. Why didn't she want to go home? There was no way he could go and leave her there. It was becoming an obsession to him to watch her. To protect her.
    "She felt as though she died? All this information was doing his head in and no closer to the truth. He had to get Tyler to make her go. Whatever it took. It was his life mission to get her off the booze before it killed her but it was easier said than done. More anger from her and she disappeared. The girl she protected came to him to thank him. Not that he did anything. She admitted to the Angel's accusation. She wanted to show her appreciation and he thought, why not?
    "Tyler came to him to say she nearly beat someone up in the hallway. He pushed the girl off his lap and went to find Tyler's sister. Why did she have to cause so much trouble. He nearly had a book thrown at his head but he didn't care. He didn't listen to her stupid rules to keep people out. She was so annoying conscious but he could watch her sleep for hours. He thought it was cute watching her struggle to zip her dress up. He wanted to touch every inch on her skin but he had to refrain. 
   "He always thought she'd look better without makeup and in that moment he was blinded by her beauty. Tight fitted dress, high heels. Was she deliberately trying to seduce him because it was working. Black? The colour of her soul? He laughed it off but he couldn't help but wonder. Was it a joke or was she serious? He was starting to read her well by that point. She pushed her phone into her bra and it was an instant message to his cock.
   "Everything she did frustrated him in more ways than one but he couldn't tell her. He would be seen as a psycho. She moved past him out of the door and his heart literally pounded out of his chest. Her scent was so enticing. Why did she always lock her door? She had no personal items so what was it all about?
   "He found himself enjoying her company and he didn't want to leave her but yet another twat took her from him. He had a brainwave, he found Rainy who he bribed with a date." He laughs, "Seems he never followed through on the date though," I smirk again. "He bribed her to play truth or dare and to make sure Tyler's sister played." I gasp. He instigated truth or dare? "He bribed Matty with fifty bucks to dare her to kiss him. He laughed in his face and it pissed him off. They had it easy. The Angel wouldn't touch him voluntarily and it pissed him off.
    "He knew she'd choose dare as she wouldn't want to reveal any truths. He found himself pissed that Nathan had his hands on the Angel. Maybe he decided he wanted her by then. He finally admitted to himself what she meant to him. Matty actually earned his cash. She was stubborn and didn't want to play but he was keen to feel her lips against his.
    "The way she instantly refused offended him. All those guys and she refused one kiss. He owed Matty big time for making her play. She was nervous, Riley Blake! She's full on but now she was shy. He found it cute. He could hear her heart literally pounding out of her chest. When his lips touched hers it was beyond anything he ever imagined. She twisted around him like ivy and there was no way he could stop.
    "He needed to be closer, she was his anchor, he could feel it in the kiss. She was showing him the light in his dark life. He knew why all those guys could never get enough. She was perfect, an Angel, a real temptation. Tyler coughed breaking their spell yet he still couldn't stop. It was by luck that she pulled away. She left a tingling sensation on his skin when she left. She fled the scene with a bottle. He needed to fix it. He had to. Did he force this on her in his own greed?
    "Did he force her to drink? He figured out by that point that she didn't show any emotion apart from rage but he made her nervous. He made her react like that to the kiss. Tyler was pissed as hell with him about the kiss. How could he not kiss her back like that? She was a real temptation and there was no way he could resist.
   "He had a feeling she wouldn't speak to him for a whole month. He tried to go into her room but she'd locked him out again. He hated her in there alone. He went to bed and woke to her screams. He wished she wasn't so complicated, she would be in his bed in that moment." He's a bit presumptuous. "He laid in bed awake until the screams stop again. He got up the next morning ready for uni. He paused outside her door. It became the norm.
      "Tyler and him went for food but she lingered on his mind as usual but now he'd tasted her lips. The possessiveness and protectiveness was only growing. His sleep only grew more restless. What with being woken by her screams and feeling her pain. He was surprised when he returned that the girl's door was open.
    "He looked inside and she was no where to be seen. He knew she wouldn't be far away with her stupid rules. He sat on the bed and awaited her return. Half a bottle of scotch drunk, she was going to kill herself and he hated the thought. She returned and she looked awful. Black rims under her eyes, no makeup but that was a plus side. She locked the door and he loved it. Their own little bubble. He hated that she had some guys top on.
    "He suspected just the top and he was struggling to control himself. She climbed into bed as if she didn't notice him. He notices her presences without looking at her and when he does so he looks at every single perfection, yet she can't even see him sat there? Still the most beautiful girl in the world he thought. She hadn't noticed him as she jumped out of bed. Was he invisible? She pulled her top down and he hated it. He never wanted her to hide.
     "He had to be on his best behaviour for him to be allowed to stay. He was anxious as he learned she was sick. She covered her delectable body and it pained him, however, she didn't make him leave and it was a win-win. Besides, it would have distracted him like fuck. She thought the scotch was minging but she drank it anyway. Why? Was she an alcoholic? He laid next to her as she fell asleep. She was so complicated.
   "When he knew she was asleep he stroked her  hair out of her face. Her face should never be covered. She wrapped herself around him again and he groaned. She was practically naked and he had to check. Just to see what he was dealing with and sure enough she was pantiless. He covered her body with the duvet to control himself. It was tough but he'd give anything just to keep her in his arms. Tyler was going to kill him.
    "He fell asleep in the middle of the day with her. How? It was the first time she woke with him still there and she removed herself from him body and he hated it. She was so cute when she was sleepy. She reached over him to grab her phone and his heart was thumping. Did she not see what she was doing to him? She was calmer and he didn't understand.
    "She left him to shower and all he wanted was to join her in the shower. Anxiety flowed right back in the minute she left the room. Tyler walked in angry as hell. He was always so easy to convince that he didn't want her but he felt so guilty. He was his best friend. Tyler told him that she made Tyler make him leave. She never asked him to leave personally. He felt frustrated. He got so close and she'd withdraw. Accident was thrown into conversation. What accident?
    "So many clues but yet so far away from the truth. She went for a run and he hated her running in the dark alone. He didn't know what to do to calm himself so he had a shower. She consumed him again. She flipped his world upside down, she was his world whether she accepted it or not. He'd been with a lot of girls but that kiss. . . he couldn't get it out of his head. He knew in that moment he wasn't strong enough to stay away from her anymore.
    "He needed some sort of release, he couldn't live on hand jobs for the rest of his life and he had no desire to sleep with the redhead once he'd tasted her lips. Another hand job in her honour as he pictured his cock in her mouth. He knew he had to do something to stop acting like a creepy stalker. He felt calmer after his climax but still anxious. She wasn't safe unless in his arms.
    "He saw her again after her run and his heart missed a beat as he saw her in that state. She couldn't breathe and she couldn't see. Why was she doing this to herself? She didn't seem that bothered. She left him standing there like a love sick puppy. Tyler texted him to meet him. He went straight there and he hated what he saw. Why were there people around their table? She was never going to eat in front of people and he needed her to eat.
    "Tyler had promised her a weeks supply of alcohol. It was killing her, he hated it. He could see the pain in her eyes as she fled the scene. He was starving so he ate her food as he knew she wasn't returning," I smirk. I turn in his arms as I find myself wanting to hear the rest. He smiles at me and cups my face. "Tyler warned him away from the Angel. Again! She never protested his company in person so he didn't understand but he didn't want to argue with him. Then she went AWOL. He was freaking out. She wouldn't reply to her brother. He made Tyler give him her number and he texted her.
   "To his surprise, she answered. She even sounded cute but drunk over text. He hurried to her. Why? The damn car wouldn't start. It's all he needed. He got it to start eventually and he went to the pub she was at. The moment he got out the car he could feel her. Was the pull getting stronger? He heard her yelling. He saw red as he ran to her voice. She didn't seem scared but she was yelling for the old guy to get off her. His blood was boiling. He was forcing himself on her and he wouldn't release her. Fair game? Never. He was his target. He had to protect her. Tyler made him snap out of his rage but he wasn't there.
    "The sound of the Angel puking brought him back to the here and now. He held her hair whilst she puked. Never in his life had he done this but he needed to do it. She leaned into his chest, seeking. . . comfort? She always sought comfort in him when she was vulnerable. She passed out on him and he hated it. Why does she do this to herself? She's going to kill herself and he would die on the inside too. He needed to stay with her in case she puked.
    "He took her to his room and put her in his bed. He watched her sleep for ages until he relaxed. He was glad she was safe in his bed and not with some random. Was he closer than he thought if she replied to his text? Thank god she replied or she'd be seriously hurt by that old man. She moved into her sleeping position on him. He had to up his game, he needed to do a better job of protecting her. He focused on her breathing until he fell asleep.  
    "When he woke she was gone. He was left frustrated. He needed to see she was okay after what happened so he walked to her room and the door was unlocked. It was a sign right? She spoke about boundaries. Why would he listen to them? It was working not listening to them. She admitted she didn't sleep in the same bed as anyone, yet He knew that wasn't true. She saw no issue with nearly being raped but she thought it was consensual?
    "Really? She clearly said no. Why would she want to sleep with an old man but not him? He noticed her hand was bloody and bruised. How did he not notice the night before? He had to control himself what with her in her bra and panties. She was walking away. She kept leaving their safe bubble and he didn't like it. She was somewhat docile in their bubble. He followed her into the bathroom. He wasn't done being in her company yet.
     "Why would she lock him in the bathroom if she was going to shower? If she truly wanted him out why would she lock it? She started undressing and he was mesmerised. He'd never seen anything more beautiful and he loved that she wasn't shy of her body. But hell was he being seduced! Did she know it? Who knows? She always showed no signs of wanting him yet she was stripping. 
    "To say he wanted nothing from her she was so far from the truth. Did she really want nothing from him? Maybe he had to be clearer. He wanted to fuck her hard and fast against the door but he knew that would get him nowhere. Tyler was going to kill him for being in there. He decided to join her in the shower. Everything would be laid out on the table. His hard on would be an instant give away.
    "She was literally scrubbing the shit out of her skin. He climbed in and he was literally burned by the scolding water yet she didn't react. She didn't seem to care that he was in the shower and aroused by her but annoyed he turned the temperature down. He looked into her eyes and saw nothing but pain. He couldn't control himself as he looked at her soft wet lips that he once tasted. He craved them, he needed them.
   "He kissed her and he had no idea how he was going to stop himself from claiming her especially when she moaned into his mouth. It was enchanting to be able to touch every inch of her. She was so soft. He pinned her against the wall, she was dominating him. When did he ever allow that? She grabbed his face and moved his lips to his neck. Hell, he'd happily kiss any part of her body but he was curious to know what that was about. She was totally affected by him, she couldn't deny it.
    "Her rules about no kissing during sex pissed him off. If he wanted to kiss her during sex he bloody well would. Did she want to have sex with him? Sometimes he couldn't tell. If she hadn't broken the connection then maybe he would have fucked her but he had no condom. He had to be careful. His rules. She removed his legs from him and he hated it. She fled the scene again!
    "Tyler caught him in the shower and he had to make some lie about how she came in and climbed in the shower with him and he climbed straight out and it pissed her off."
    "Hey," I protest and pout my lips.
    "Shh, it's my story," he kisses my lips before he carries on. "He didn't know what to do. He needed them both in his life but how could he make them both happy? She made her own way in to uni because she's fucking stubborn," he rolls his eyes and I smirk. I like being stubborn, "She was smoking and drinking again! Did the night before teach her nothing? He couldn't let her withdraw again so he texted her asking her what she was doing."
    I know where this is going, he slips his hand between my legs and slides his fingers inside me and I gasp. "So wet, is my story turning you on?"
    "How could it not? Instant hard ons," I mumble.
    He smirks, "Anyway, she replied to say that she was receiving a finger fuck from some random. How clear did he need to make it? She asked him if he wanted picture evidence. Fuck no, but he would have liked other naked pictures of her," he kisses my cheek as he pumps his fingers inside of me. "He needed to find a way of claiming her. It was the only way. He hated the thought of her climaxing in a room full of people.
     "He couldn't stop thinking about his fingers inside of her. The lecture dragged even the fucking lecturer ran late delaying his time with her. He hurried to his next class and his anxiety settled when he saw her sat outside the room. He was jealous and had to ask her about it. He's never been jealous so it was new for him. He didn't understand it at all.
    "It made him feel much better that he couldn't make her climax. You just need to know the right buttons to press," he smirks as my legs tighten and he works his fingers giving me his full attention until I come around his fingers. He withdraws his fingers and I whimper. "No one could get her off? He found it interesting and a challenge rolled into one.
    "He was horrified at all the bottles in her bag. She said it was harder being sober which would indicate that she wasn't an alcoholic. So what was it? Gah, he was so frustrated. After she fled the scene again he didn't see her until after classes. He heard her fake laugh as she walked out of the twats room in her underwear. His eyes fixed on her body and she walked towards him. He followed her into her room. His mind wandered to threesome?
   "He didn't know what he thought of that. Threesome with her would be wasted. His eyes would only be on her. He's come to the conclusion that her nightmares stopped at 3 am to have sex with that dickhead. And she was wearing one of his tops. She had no shame. He hated that she let them keep stuff as a memento. It made his blood boil. She locked the door again and he smiled. He loved it.
    "She struggled with the zip again and he wanted to touch as much skin as he could. He needed to, any connection was better than none. She created as much distance as she could. He made a joke about Jesse being her boyfriend. I don't date she said. What did that girl do? She wasn't living. No friends. What was he to her if not a friend, boyfriend, lover? Did he mean anything to her? He figured it out. She didn't feel so he had to make her feel.
     "She admitted her pain. Someone hurt her. He kind of already knew that from her nightmares. Trust, it was about trust. Had he not earned her trust already? She let him in her space, she slept in the same bed, she texted him. He was so close he couldn't have the rare diamond slip through his fingers.
     "She never could lie to him. She started to open up to him, he was getting somewhere. Alone? Never not with him there. He never wanted to leave her, it was her that kept leaving him. He had to kiss her. He didn't like the words that were coming out of her mouth. She felt what he did, she was just stubborn. The feelings scared her that's why she tried so hard to block him out. She never made any sense, pushing against his chest but responding to his kiss.
    "She was so wet, if she didn't feel she wouldn't be wet for him. He was in so much discomfort. The sight of her was fucking bliss but he was so hard with no release but he had to pleasure her. He'd never been so turned on. To feel inside of her was intoxicating. He couldn't take his eyes of this beauty. He had to taste her whilst he could. She smelled so fucking sweet. She tasted even better, he has never been so turned on pleasuring a girl.
    "She was so responsive that he didn't understand why they couldn't get her to climax. To watch her fall apart as her orgasm ripped through her was by far the best sexual experience at that time. He watched as she came down from her high. He was shocked when he discovered she'd never climaxed, ever. He always assumed it was a barrier thing after she had died. He couldn't have her withdrawing already. He loved being in her company like this. He marvelled in the fact that he was the only one.
     "He pulled her onto his lap and it was a turn on. He wanted so desperately to claim her like this. He cupped her face and she leaned into his touch. He was overjoyed, he was getting somewhere. He had to make her see what he wanted. What he needed but she freaked out again. Who hurt her this badly? She couldn't trust anyone.
    "He was frustrated as hell as Tyler shouted at him to stay away from her. She even threatened to kill herself. Again, she never protested in his company. She cut herself and she was too far gone and said let me bleed. He was anxious when she was in this mood. He was too angry and walked outside and he punched the wall," I shiver and he strokes my cheek.
    "What could he do? An idea struck. Games help her open up, he bribed Lucy to get her to play never have I ever," my eyes widen as he confesses to yet another game. "His eyes never left hers even though she was on some randoms lap again."
I bite my lip. "That was the guy from computer science. The one that gave me the finger fuck."
He glares at me. "Fucking hell, I'm glad I didn't know that." He shakes his head, "Threesome, not surprised, stranger? Eh, he was never surprised where she was concerned. Tyler's comment, caught at it by parents? Naughty," I roll my eyes. Big deal.
   "She nearly didn't drink on his comment. Push people out, she sure does that. Older person? Well he'd seen her with that old dude so he wasn't surprised when she drank. Same sex? Hot," I roll my eyes again. "Cheated on, he thought there was no way an Angel would be cheated on and then she sipped her drink. Who the fuck would do that? Faked an orgasm, considering he'd discovered that he was the only one to give her one. He seemed surprised that she didn't even try to fake it. Pregnant, he was sure of that one!
    "He couldn't believe his eyes when she drank. Pregnant? Pain was all he saw on her face, why was she being so honest? Forced into sex? He prayed to God that she didn't drink, he literally screamed at her not to drink and then his heart stopped when she did. And then she fled again. Raped? His Angel, never? How could she fuck every guy when she dealt with that? He had to go to her. He shakily got to his feet when he recovered.
    "He walked up the stairs and Tyler said she wouldn't open the door. He wasn't surprised. Tyler didn't know. He was nearly crying at her confessions. He hated that he found out from a stupid drinking game. He wanted her to tell him herself."