criminalminds x reader

chapter 52

Tw sh

A few hours have passed.
When I got a text from Carlos.

Carlos🤠: big wolf is coming

"Shit"
"What is it?" Emily asked

"Penelope!" I scream and she walked in.
"Big wolf is coming let's go"
"Y/n you need to forgive him"
I drag her to the elevator.
"I'll forgive him if he apologises and changes his ways" the elevator door opend and their is he.

Eddie my oldest brother.
"My 2 favourite sisters " he says as he walks out penelope hugs him but I don't.
"What are you doing here Eddie?"
"Can't I come and check on my little sisters" he said

"No you can't. You can't bc you left me behind. I was too big of a burden. You never looked back after mom and dad died. You didn't even visit me in the hospital!" The team gathered around.

"What are you talking about y/n?" Spencer asked.
"This is my oldest brother Eddie. The brother who left me to rot. I was in the same car crash my parents died in. And you! You didn't visit! You had your own live, your own house! You didn't look behind when grandma died or when I was in recovery from my Ed! Not even now when eva died and I went to a mental hospital! All I ever heard from you was through Carlos "

Emily walked behind me and noticed I was shaking.
"Maybe you should leave and do this another time?" Emily asked my brother.

"That's why I came here y/n. I wanted to apologise. I'm worried about you-"
"Ow now your worried? Not when I was in a coma for a week bc I tried to kill myself. Or not when I was in high-school starving myself while making myself bleed. And smoking pod behind school. "

"I was always worried. But I was already 29 when our parents died
My wife was pregnant and-" He tried to speak.
"You didn't care! And I believe you were just asked to leave!" The whole team was in shock.

"Y/n why don't we talk about this somewhere private?" He went on.

"Fine if you won't leave I will"
I stormed down the staires rhe whole team was flabbergasted.

The last thing I heard was penelope saying
"She has ever right to be mad Eddie "

I got home and took out my razor.
Just this morning em and I decided on a word so I can ask for help. But she's not here. I'm all alone with my razor.

I take of my pants and undid the bandages that emily just put up yesterday.

I cut in both my thighs. I'm so mad at Eddie. I know he had his own life but all my other siblings moved out eventually (execpt Carlos bc he still lives in the house) execpt they looked back they cared for me. And got me the help I needed. Even now, when I got out of the mental hospital a bit more than 4 months ago. They all texted. I wasn't ready to talk to them then but I do now. And they ask how im doing. They even know about emily. But Eddie only knows bc my other siblings tell him stuff.

I drag my blade over and over until blood rushes out. My thighs feel hot and I get a burning sensation. I used a wet cloth to cool of my thighs and then wrapped then up again.

I start to get dizzy as i realised I haven't eaten yet. The breakfast eggs that emily made got replaced by something way more tasty. And I forgot to eat lunch bc I was busy in paperwork.

I stumble in my bed room and pass out on the bed.

I wake up and my head hurts I noticed my feet were elevated on a pillow.
My thighs sting and my stomach is growling.
I put my hand on my head as I wince from the headache.
"Em?" She walked in with a glass of water.
"I already saw the razor. You don't need to explain" she said as she gave me the glass of water. I took out a painkiller from my night stand and poor it down with the water.

"I am so sorry...you weren't here and and...everything was rushing in my head. And-" I try to explain as tears leave my face.
"Shh it's okay I'm not mad"
She's the best girlfriend I could wish for.

"I do think you should know.. your brother is stay here for a bout a week if you want to talk to him. You don't have too" emily held my hand as I took the last sip of water. I didnt respond to what she said.

"Let's get you some sugar" I got worried she was going to make me eat. I really didn't feel like it.
She walked out with some orange juice and fruit.
I was worried about the fruit but its not that bad so I just slowly ate it as emily came to sit next to me.

She took her laptop and put on greys anatomy. The very first episode.
I had already seen it multiple times and was waiting for the new season to air. Its really my comfort show...and emily knows that.

"Alex is an asshole" I laugh at the comment knowing her opinion will change.
"What's so funny?"
"Just with greys. Your option about a caracter can easily change. For the worst or the beter"

"Okay out of meredith, Cristina, izzy, George and Alex who is your favourite?" She asked me.
"Cristina "
"Mine too" she says
"Ofc"
"We are kinda Meredith and Cristina. Dark and twisty " she said which made me laugh.
"Thank you" I say to her with a smile as I hug her harder.
"What for?"
"For being an amazing girlfriend "
I smile and her and she returns it