Chase and Madelyn: A love story

Chapter 18

TW: Mentions of miscarriage and self harm 

Madelyn's POV:

It had been a couple hours since the procedure and I was allowed to go home. I was broken. I had called my parents to tell them what happened. They invited us over but I just wanted to go home and sleep. I agreed to see them sometime this week, they wanted to make sure that I was okay.

When we got home, Chase helped me out of the car and into the apartment. It was 7 PM by now. We didn't talk much about what happened, it was too raw and fresh.

"I think I'll pick up some dinner for us, what do you want?" Chase asked.

I shrugged, "Pizza maybe? You decide." I was hungry but I knew I wouldn't eat. I could never eat when something was wrong.

"Are you ok on your own? I'll only be 15 minutes." He asked. 

"Yeah." I said while nodding. "I think I'm gonna lie down."

"Ok, take it easy. Let me get you an Advil." Chase replied. He knew I had bad cramps and was uncomfortable. "I love you, call me if you need anything." He said.

I agreed and headed to the bedroom. I was so exhausted. About 10 minutes later I heard a faint knock on the door. 

"Chase?" I called out with a raspy voice. My voice always became coarse when I cried.

The door opened. 

"Maddie? It's Madison. The door was unlocked, can I come in?" I heard Madison say from the entryway. 

I didn't respond. She didn't even know about the pregnancy, let alone the miscarriage. 

"Maddie, are you ok? You and Chase haven't responded to my texts in like 2 days." She called. Madison was a worrier. She always made sure that everyone around her was ok. 

"I'm in the bedroom..." I said as the sound of footsteps came closer. I heard her footsteps pause for a moment as she walked past the bathroom. 

"Maddie?!" She called as she entered the bedroom. "Are you ok?" She asked again. 

I nodded. Madison could tell that I was lying. I looked awful. I was slumped over in bed. My face was all red and puffy, and I still had hospital bands up my arm.

"What happened? Where's Chase?" She asked. 

"Chase stepped out to pick up dinner." I said avoiding the first question.

Madison sat at the foot of the bed and place her hand on my legs.

"Did you cut yourself?" She asked, her tone very serious.

"No, why does everyone keep asking me that?!" I replied, now annoyed.

"Madelyn! I'm asking you that because there's blood all over the bathroom! You're clearly not doing well." She stated. She saw the hospital bands around my wrist.

"Were you in the hospital?" She asked quietly. "Maddie, you can tell me if it happened again, it's ok. Talk to me." Madison said referring to the cutting.

I covered the hospital bands with my other hand. "It didn't happen, nothing happened." I said while turning away from her.

"I just want to know that you're ok, I'm worried about you. Will you please tell me what's going on?" She begged.

I was annoyed, but I knew that Madison was concerned for my safety. 

"I had a miscarriage..." I said. My eyes began to water and I turned towards the pillow so she wouldn't see me cry.

Madison paused. She looked confused.

"You were... pregnant?" She finally asked. I nodded. "I'm so so sorry Maddie. I had no idea." She said.

"We weren't gonna tell anyone that I was pregnant yet. I started bleeding this morning. The baby's gone." I said now visibly crying.

Madison leaned down to hug me not knowing what to say. I could tell that she was really surprised. The front door opened again and it was Chase.

"I got pizza." He called.

Madison got off the bed and started walking towards him. 

"Bails? What are you doing here?" Chase asked before Madison hugged him tightly.

"I'm so sorry." She said.

"Maddie told you?" He asked.

Madison nodded while still hugging Chase. 

"I'll leave you two be. I'm so sorry. I'm here if you need me, ok?" She said not wanting to intrude.

"Can you actually stay for a bit?" I asked emerging from the bedroom. "I think we could use your smile and laugh right now, right Chase?" I said and he nodded. Madison always knew how to cheer us up. When I was sad, she was usually the one who brought my smile back. 

"Are you sure?" She asked. 

"Please," Chase said. "My girlfriend is literally wearing a diaper right now, the least you could do is eat some dinner with us." He said attempting to lighten the mood. 

I laughed. "I am. I'm actually wearing an adult diaper."

We all laughed and brought the pizza to the couch. I didn't really eat much. Chase noticed. 

"Maddie, can you please take a few bites?" He pleaded. "You have a lot of medication in your system still, but no food. I don't want to you to throw up or something." He said.

I agreed and slowly ate one piece of pizza. 

"Are you going to tell the others?" Madison asked.

"I don't know, only our parents and Jonas knew that I was pregnant. I feel like it's kinda weird to be like oh yeah by the way I was pregnant but the baby died so I'm not anymore." I said.

Chase agreed, "Yeah we haven't decided yet." he said while placing a hand on my back to calm me. 

Madison stayed for about two hours. She comforted us and made us laugh.

"I love you both so much. Will you be good for work on Monday or are you taking a few days off?" Madison asked asked as she put her shoes on getting ready to leave.

"I think I'll be fine. The doctor said the cramps should only last a few days, and I think the bleeding has mostly stopped." I replied.

"Maddie, no..." Chase said with a sympathetic look on his face. "You just had a miscarriage and surgery. You should be taking it easy, I don't want you to overwork yourself. I'll talk to Jonas." He said.

"Chase, I'm fine. Seriously." I said. I was annoyed. I wanted to go back right away to get my mind off things. 

"We'll talk about this later." He said still not giving in. 

Madison hugged us both and then left.

"Call if you need anything, I'm here for y'all." She said.

I smiled. "I love you, thank you."

After Madison left, Chase cleaned the bathroom as I headed to bed.

"You don't have to do that right now." I said. I knew the bloody scene would probably be triggering for him. 

He continued to wipe the tub and the toilet. "It's ok. Tomorrow will be a fresh start, yeah?" He asked. I agreed. 

After he finished with the bathroom, he joined me in bed and we snuggled until we both fell asleep.

"I wouldn't of wanted to do this shitty day with anyone else." I said.

"Me neither, I love you Mads." He replied.