Secret Admirer | Hosie {finished}

33. A long overdue confession

During the after party Josie decided to get back to the tent to change into a more fitting outfit and upon entering she saw the rose on her bed, her eyes rolling thinking it was from Penelope but instead she found a note with the same messy hand writing as she had previously seen in Hope's notebook a few days ago. She immediately knew it was from her. Part of herself didn't want to give Hope the satisfaction of showing up and listening to whatever she had to say, but the other part of herself thought about Hope's past and how she was attempting to get out of that toxic habit and maybe just maybe Josie was the one who was supposed to mend her soul and help her get over her past trauma.

Finally, she decided to grab a jacket wear it around her shoulders and walk to the dock where it was rather dark with only one lamp post lighting the way, and there she stood looking at the lake.

"You really thought romance could do the trick, huh?" Josie said while approaching Hope from behind.

"Surprised?" Hope turned to face Josie with a serious face, the hurt was even evident in her eyes it looked like she had been crying and Josie could sense that just by looking through them even though she was putting on a good damn show.

"Never thought you had it in you, Mikaelson. Anyway, I don't have much time, whatever it is you can go on and say it.." Josie said with a rather weak voice and Hope looked back at the dark lake, contemplating rather deeply.

"You know you were right. I hate to admit it to myself, but maybe if I did it sooner I would have found better ways to cope with it all. I do miss my father, and nothing I will ever do will bring him back. And maybe meeting your dad and your special little family made me jealous at some point, but all I really wanted was to fit in somewhere..somehow. I know it was a reckless move to basically plot with him against your sister, but I swear all I've been thinking about is your guy's happiness and how to be part of it."

"This is not what happiness is supposed to be like, Hope. And of course I wish your happiness too. Hell I could even tell there was an underlying reason why you could never settle with anyone from the moment I met you. And I thought I was supposed to help you, go through it with you, I really wanted it to. But you'd rather push me away and take the easy way out. You're not letting the happiness in, Hope."

"Yeah because it's easier to be with someone who barely knows anything for my past and I don't have to attach myself emotionally to them. Basically, I never have to worry if that happiness will be taken away from me ever again."

"So is that what it is? You've grown feelings for me? Is that what scares you so much?"

Josie grabbed the other girl's arm and turned her so they could face each other, feeling agony about getting answers. Hope turned at the subtle touch, but her blue eyes ceased to meet Josie's gaze as she felt them tearing up again and this time she couldn't hold it back like she always did. Hope felt embarrassed for breaking, especially in front of someone who meant so much.

"Hope..talk to me, please." Josie's voice was soft and sincere.

"God, Josie I've loved you when you didn't even know it.."

Josie broke out into the softest smile and placed a hand on Hope's cheek, using her thumb to gently wipe the tears away from her beautiful face. It was the first time she had seen the Mikaelson girl so vulnerable, and it was probably the first and last time Hope admitted her feelings so opening to anyone, in her whole existence.

"And that's really beautiful, Hope. Love is a beautiful feeling and you shouldn't hide it away anymore. Not from me at least."

"But I'm scared of what's going to happen if I lose you..which seems to be happening a lot lately. And don't get me wrong, I know it is all my fault too. Me and my reckless bitchy act probably have caused more damage than I care to admit."