Through A Different Lens {Marina/Maya & Carina}

Relinquished Yield (Chapter 22)

Anxiety, a feeling of unease. A fear, a worry that can be mild...or can be severe, to the point of medical attention. Anxiety is a normal human reaction and everyone in their life has experienced something on the line of anxiety. Have you ever been scared to do an exam? Fly to another country?..or hell, have you ever been scared to leave your house due to being scared of the unpredictable world? 

Well then, that's anxiety. And having anxiety is one thing, but mixing it with the thoughts of overthinking, never worked well in the fumbling hands of a blonde fire captain. Fiditingly pacing around the hallways of her apartment, watching the hands on the clock tick over, or the digital numbers on her watch change. 

“Maya, you're giving me a headache with all the pacing” Carina mumbled from the couch. 

“Sorry”  The blonde tried to slow her steps, leaning against the back of the couch as she kept her view broadened. She would look down at her watch every two minutes as she tapped her foot against the wooden floor. 

“Maya” Carina turned slightly, her hand resting on the back of Maya's hand that rested on the back of the couch. “Take a breath and come sit down,” Carina calmly spoke. She also was pacing around inside her head, trying to scatter thoughts that made her so shaky, surely she should be happy? Finn was supposed to be here within the next twenty minutes, surely they should be jumping with joy, ecstatic to see their little man return to their arms. 

And yet, they weren't jumping for joy…instead they sat emotionless, watching the clock like watching paint dry and twiddling their fingers like their lives depended on a source of distraction. “Okay, what if she doesn't return him, what if she has just taken off, for no-one to see”

“That would be a felony. Although, kidnapping charges might help with our case”

“Carina” Maya exclaimed.

“I'm sorry, that was- I'm not thinking properly. She will return. Even though it hurts to say, if she truly wants a chance at taking Finn back, she has no other choice but to return him. We are still his primary source of care” Carina explained, her hands subtly wiping against her thighs, the clam of her palms somewhat bugging her.

“Okay, should we like- should we ask that?” Maya stuttered, her head hanging loosely.

“Ask what?”

“Ask her intentions with Finn”

Carina slightly shakes her head, not as a way to answer Maya's question, but as a way to try and contain the emotions in her head. They were very powerful emotions, and when anything about Finn was mentioned, it caused a tear to threaten its escape. “I don't think she would request to see him on Thanksgiving of all days if her intentions weren't to regain primary care” She answered, watching as Maya begrudgingly shook her head. 

It wasn't the answer Maya wanted, but then again, she wanted none of this, it hurt too much…and although things like this needed to be discussed, it still pressed bruises into their hearts whenever the topic was mentioned. This type of pain was something that neither Carina or Maya had ever experienced before, there was nothing they could compare it to… and equally, maybe that's why it hurt more. 

They didn't have a vision to the outcomes. They didn't know what the end of this was going to look like…they were on an unmarked trail with torches that gave out every couple of minutes. They felt like they were navigating through a corn maze, banging the base of the torches to try and get more juice out of the battery life. 

Would they find the exit to this maze? See the light at the end of the tunnel…or were they bound to end up in a crop field, set ablaze by something they should have seen as the inevitable? Would they have to survive the burning crops, the thinning air and flare ups that they desperately tried to stamp out? Was this going to be their lives from now on? Or was a knock on the door going to be their echo visual that guides them to the end of the maze?