AFAAOCSAAABAS

Part 43: Operation: Dave Retrival

Part 43: Operation: Dave Retrieval

Part 1

— meanwhile at hq —
NB003: don't you feel a little bad..? He looked like he had a nice life in the household...
NB001: He'll need to readjust, yes, but otherwise he would've branched off completely. He needs to stay with us.
NB003: why does he need to? One nasaball defecting might be a good thing, removing bad genes from the gene pool
NB001: You could be correct, but 1025 over here would've detached himself from our concept core. Who knows what would've happened? I say that he should live out the rest of his life where he belongs.
NB003: I guess you're right....
DV: (being dragged along by 001)
-~loud crash could be heard in the distance then a bunch of screams~-
NB001: You take him back to the re-education area. I'm going to check this out.
SR: (jaw unfurled) GRAAASAHHHHHHH GIVE ME BACK MY BOYFRIEND
NB001: (He turns his hat backwards, ready to face Sardi)
SR: (eyes aflame with rage, breathing heavily, staring him directly in his eyes) you.... you imposter... you're not dave....
(snaps her jaw at him)
NB001: (He clears his throat, perfectly imitating Dave's voice) But- but I thought we were together?
(He looks at Sardi with a sad, sad look on his face)
SR: (eyes go from rage to concerned) wait dave.... that is you???
(Jaw returns inside of her)
(Gives him a hug) i'm sorry I thought you were someone else, I'm just glad you are okay, I couldn't make it without you...
NB001: (He stays silent, recoiling at the touch but still hugging her)
SR: Are you feeling okay Dave, you usually like my hugs...
NB001: I'm- I'm fine, just a bit put off by all this.
SR: well come on, we'll get you home safe and sound
NB001: Yes, home..
(He signals for 003 to tranquilizer her)
NB003: (nods head and he fires at her)
SR: (dart hit her and she collapses on top of 001, nearly crushing him)
NB003: sir are you okay!!
NB001: GAH! Get this lard load off me!
SR: (still awake but woozy) hey... I'm not that fat.....
NB001: (Switching back to normal voice) I'd rather take Hustun over this mutant carp any day.
NB003: (shoots her again)
It wasn't enough sir...
SR: (passes out)
NB001: Get. her. Off.
NB003: (shoves her off with a big shove)
NB001: (Dusting himself off)
Get back to work. I'll deal with her.
NB003: yes sir! (Heads back into the reeducation center)
NB001: (Dragging Sardi away)
NB003: (arrives at the reeducation center, and begins to wake dave up)
DV: Hhhuuuh? Where am I?
NB003: hello dave, or should I say 1025, you will no longer be referred to as dave, and you will return to your original number assigned. (Begins to tape 1025 to the chair) I have a little video I want you to see.
DV: No, no, no... I'm not back here. This is just a dream!
Where's Sardi??
NB003: you will forget you ever met that fowl beast, or else you will be punished
DV: No! I want to know where Sardi is!
NB003: even if I did know where she is being detained, that information would be classified
DV: I know you know where she is!
NB003: SHUT UP YOU LITTLE PEE BABY AND WATCH THE GOSH DARN VIDEO (clicks play on a remote and a video begins to play)
DV: (Reluctantly shutting up)
ReEducation Program: (The television lights up)
(A goofy, cartoonish voice starts speaking) Hello, little NASA larva!
DV: ...You have to be kidding.
EP: Today, we'll be learning about CONCEPT CORES!
DV: I learned all of this already!
This is just dumb!
NB003: (slaps him) SHUT UP AND LISTEN
DV: OW..
EP: You may be wondering where you originate from! This is where CONCEPTS come in.
This CONCEPT, in this case, space exploration, is your CONCEPT CORE.
It goes on to branch off into NASA, where you little larva start to come in.
You are tied to this concept! Every single one of you little larva are attached to NASA.
NB003: heh, I love this video....
DV: Uuugghh..
EP: Now, because you are direct branches of the CORE, detaching could have disastrous consequences!
The longer you stay away, the thinner your branch gets.
Eventually you could even DETACH COMPLETELY!
Leading to horrible consequences.
Now, for you little NASA larva, the closest CORE to your own is of the concept of CULTURE.
But imagine the drastic changes!
DV: This is so boring....
NB003: id pay attention to this next part... it will show you why you shouldn't defect.
EP: The concept of CULTURE leads to HUMANS. It will bring horrible transformations, like growing a SPLEEN, or HAIR.
That's all the time we have for now! Tune in next time! (The TV abruptly shuts off)
NB003: (shivers) always give me the chills thinking about having a spleen...
DV: Am I done now?
NB003: Yup! Now get back to work. (Takes the tape off of him)
DV: Uuugghh...
I just want Sardi back...
NB003: DONT TALK ABOUT IT ANYMORE
DV: No! Sardi Sardi Sardi! I want her here with me!
NB003: (pointing to the tv) you want to watch that video again???
DV: no...
NB003: that's what I thought! Now chop chop! Get back to work! Ill be in the the alien detainment center dealing with a newcomer if you need me,
DV: Hmmph.