South Park Elementary Cafeteria, lunchtime. The students are eating lunch. Butters holds court at a table. Around him are Stan, Tolkien, Clyde, Kevin, Kenny, Craig,Kyle, and Y/N.
Butters:And so then, and so then it turns out the Terminator secretly had a kid, ten years ago. Meaning Terminator could be his own father. And then Skeletor gets angry and wants to fight him.
Kyle:[looks at Craig, who looks back] ...No, dude, that's not the trailer for Terminator 5, that really happened.
Butters:[jumps up on the bench] Skeletor is real??
Stan:No, dude, that's not Skeletor, that's Terminator's wife.
Butters:Skeletor's a lady??
Cartman:[storms into the cafeteria and walks towards the table] Goddamnit!!! [Butters sits back down] Who the fuck do they think they are?! [arrives and starts pacing back and forth] This is the last fucking straw!!! I AM GOING TO FUCKING KILL EVERYBODY!!!
Y/N:What made you so upset?
Cartman:[begins to rattle the table] I AM SO SICK OF THIS FUCKING SCHOOOOOL!!! [Butters groans as Cartman shakes the table. Cartman soon stops] This stupid school and its stupid principal have gone too far this time!!!!
Kyle:You get in trouble again, Cartman?
Cartman:No, I didn't do a damn thing!!! Nothing!!! I told you, this school is a DEN of SNAKES!!! You're not gonna believe what they did this time, you guys!!!
Stan:Dude we're, we're just trying to eat.
Y/N:And trying to have a normal day
Craig:There's no such thing as a normal day
Cartman:Oh, you think I'm overreacting again, huh?! No!!! Not this time!!! [flies into a rage again and rattles the table] The school has gone too far, and it affects each and every one of you!!! [the other boys look at each other] You remember the school physical we all took last week?!
Stan:Yeah.
Cartman:Well, the school put the sizes of all our penises up on a big chart in the school hallway!!!
Kyle:[skeptical, as is tradition] No they didn't.
Cartman:Yeah they fucking did, Kyle!!!
Y/N:Your a fucking idiot
Cartman:Shut the fuck up!
Stan:Dude, why would the school put up the sizes of our wieners?
Cartman:Because they don't fucking care!! I've told you this!! They don't give a shit about the students, and they live to make us miserable!!
Kyle:That doesn't make any sense.
Cartman:Go look for yourselves!!!
The school hallway, moments later. The boys and Y/N gather in front of the chart Cartman had mentioned
Cartman:There, you see?! Can you fucking believe it?!
Butters:Is that really all our wiener sizes?
Cartman:Yeah, dude, look at it! It says right there: "Eric Cartman, 1.2 inches"! [turns around and faces the other boys] Why would they tell everybody that?! They wanna measure my wiener?! Fine! But don't put me on blast!
Craig:Craig Tucker, 2.4 inches. Yeah, that's about right.
Y/N:Why am I even here
Craig:I don't know,but it's a good thing you did
Y/N:Yeah,I don't want to her about you guys "dick size"
Craig:Not even mine
Y/N:No
YOU ARE READING
Crazy South Park love Craig Tucker x reader(Cartman sister)
De TodoYou are Y/N Y/M/N Cartman and you are 16 years old. You and Carman are twins but your mom couldn't take care of you and you had to like with the rest of your family. A few years later you have the option to live with your mom and you pack your stuf...
