My Sunflower

twenty five

My alter ego is definitely jeopardised at the moment by the way Harry continuously makes eye contact with me, blushes slightly, smiles with the dimples saying hello. I can't help but feel as if I'm actually getting somewhere with my delusional dream that he might want to be my boyfriend someday.

The stadium is packed sky high with people, chants and cheers thrumming the ear drums, like every concert. The band plays over the sound, Harry's voice coming in like a soothing balm over a burn on the skin- it makes you feel relief, safety, but also excitement and the adrenaline pulses through your body until your fingers tremble.

He's wearing nothing but a feathered jacket, the colours orange and yellow. His smooth milky skin of his tummy on full display, and every time he takes an inhale of breath, the butterfly on his tummy expands as if in flight. His flared trousers are a very dark blue that they almost look black, making it look as though he's a phoenix flying in the night's sky.

And his hair is still in two space buns, which I find is fucking adorable.

He's singing Sign Of The Times at the moment, a water effect below his feet that makes him look as though he's standing in a puddle. His eyes look glossy with unshed tears, and he gazes over to me with a sad look in his eye.

It brings a pang of sadness to course through me.

Fireworks explode around us, and I see the way he slightly startles but continues to sing with that angel voice nonetheless.

He finishes the song and we all cheer. I see Jade wiping tears from her eyes, broad smile on her face that it brings pride to my heart that Harry can make my best friend feel this happy.

He comes closer to the edge of the stage. "This is the part of the show where you raise those silly little signs of yours up, and I try my best to read through them all!" he announces in the microphone.

Jade and I hold up our big sign and he's quick to walk further toward us.

"Let's see if this sign will make me feel a little humour." He leans further, gives a thumbs up toward the drawing I did of spaghetti. "What do women and spaghetti have in common? Oh God, here we go," he mumbles the last part, but it still gets caught in the mic. "They both wiggle when you eat them." Harry pinches the bridge of his nose, collapsing into a crouch position, microphone long gone on the stage. His shoulders are shaking, and I'm afraid we've just killed the man.

He lifts his head up to show that he isn't crying, but in fact pissing himself laughing, to the point where he has to lay on the stage, knees bent, hands over his face to cover himself.

The people in the crowd are laughing and clapping too, and the boy next to me is shaking his head in amusement.

"Were you the guys that went to his Germany show, too? With the other joke about a toaster and all that?" the boy asks.

I nod. "That'd be us, yeah!"

"You're doing God's work, making Harry laugh like that! How do you have the money to travel?"

I bite my lip. "Just lucky, I guess." I don't think it's really my place to boast about how Harry has allowed and invited us to these gigs. It might bring unwanted attention onto the matter.

"Well, I'm happy to see Harry happy." He gives me a high five, flipping his long pink hair over his shoulder, wiping at a sequined eye with his thumb.

Jade winks at me. "Guess you got yourself an orgy tonight." She elbows me gently in the ribs, wiggling her eyebrows toward the pink haired boy, then to Harry.

I press my palm into her cheek, pushing her, flushing red and biting my lip. I look up to see Harry tilting his head toward me whilst grabbing some water. I smile a little wider, teeth still sinking into the pillow of my bottom lip.