wait for me

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After that I broke down. I fell to the floor on my knees and sobbed. I was about to loose the one true person I loved and I wasn't ready to let go yet. Why did Price have to do this to us again, have we not gone through enough already??

As I clung to the sheets hanging off the end of my bed tightly to stop myself from fully collapsing and having a mental breakdown, as if I wasn't having one already, Soap walked in. I hadn't even noticed until I felt his arms hold me, pulling me off my knees and onto his lap as he knelt next to me, holding me against his chest protectively. I instinctively gripped the already tight fitting fabric of his khaki shirt and continued to sob, but suddenly the tears began to run dry and my breathing calmed, simply just from knowing that I wasn't alone in this, or at least not yet. I buried my face into Soaps shirt that now was at least three shades darker than originally from all of my tears. I felt his softly and tenderly kiss my forehead before resting his chin on my head and closing his eyes. Soap was like an older brother who you could never say no to and could make anyone anywhere feel safe. One of his hands moved up to behind my head and intertwined with my hair, pressing me closer against him even though I don't think that it was physically possible to get any closer.

There was pure silence between us for about a hour apart from the sounds of our heavy breathing that slowly mellowed off overtime. That silence somehow brought me more closure than any words ever could, with an exception to all the 'I love you's i once had from Simon. Soon our grips on each other loosened and I fell back against the edge of my bed, resting my back up against it as I brought my knees to my chest. He looked over to me and gave me a look that siad 'i don't want this to happen either'.  Soap grabbed my hand and rubbed its back with his thumb in a gentle circular motion as he just stared into my eyes with a soft forgiving smile on his face. "You and Simon need each other, don't let him go, not like this..." Soap spoke softly and as I sat and listened I realised that he was right. I couldn't stop him from going but I could stop myself from regretting these last few moments, even though obviously or more hopefully he'd come home either way. I smiled slightly and nodded back at Soap acknowledging his surprisingly good words.

After that talk with Soap he went to change into his kit and I went looking for Simon, unsurprisingly he was in his room. I didn't bother to knock but instead just barged in and ran over to him, hugging him tightly. I had caught him right as he was changing when he only had his cargos, boots and balaclava on, no shirt. When I first hugged him I could feel how warm and tender his skin was beneath my fingers, the way it tensed up at first but learned to accept my affection gradually and the way the scar tissue of all his wounds was like little dents in his skin. I felt his hands hug me back, but it was different this time, it was more tender and protective, it felt as if we were one. "I'm sorry..." he whispered quietly as he pressed his head against my shoulder, nestling his face into my neck. i wanted to speak but no words would come out, just quietly sobs.

i looked up into his icy blue gaze and watched as his eyes scanned over my features, as if taking in every little detail so he wouldn't forget it whilst he was away. my hands instinctively moved to his neck, tugging at the rim of his balaclava until his lips were revealed. i hadn't even noticed i was doing it until his eyes broke contact with mine and stared at my lips. i opened my mouth to speak but before i could even make any sound, his mouth was on mine. i instantly closed my eyes and savoured the moment knowing that it wouldn't be repeated for a while. his hands tenderly moved to my waist, pulling me closer against him again as our tongues intertwined within our mouths. slowly i pulled away, gazing into his eyes deeply once again and a small, sincere smile came across his face. "promise me you'll be waiting for me when i come back.." he said quietly almost beneath his breath. i couldn't help but smile at his words before nodding. "of course i will, Simon..."

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