The Maine Attraction

15. Expectations

I couldn't get the images of last night out of my head as I stood in front of the coffee pot, the pot of water in my hand waiting to be poured into the machine. I couldn't stop thinking about the way Sawyer's body felt against mine, the way he looked, the way he sounded. It was all so much to take in and I couldn't stop thinking about it.

"Morning," Sawyer's voice came from behind me, startling me. I gasped, not realizing that I'd been that deep in my own thoughts. He wrapped his arms around my waist, pressing his front to my back. "Didn't mean to scare you." He chuckled.

I shook my head, pouring the water into the coffee pot before I started to add the coffee grounds. "Good morning." I said back to him. Once I was finished, I turned on the coffee pot before turning around so that I could face him. 

Sawyer grinned and leaned down to press his lips against mine. He tasted minty, like he'd just brushed his teeth.

God I could get used to this.

When he pulled away from me he said, "Does it feel weird, you being here with me without Callum?"

I shrugged, leaning against the counter. "I mean we've hung out before, so no. Not really. It feels weird kissing you behind his back." I admitted.

Sawyer and I had hung out plenty of times, most of the time it was only for short periods while Callum was doing something. But since being home on this trip, I'd spent a decent amount of time with just Sawyer so it felt less strange now. But it did still feel odd making out with him, amongst other things.

Sawyer chuckled but nodded. "Fair enough, it is a little weird kissing my best friend's little sister."

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah yeah, I know. Are we going to tell him about this or?" I trailed off, not even really sure what this was. I thought I was over the crush that I had on him, but it was more than obvious that I was definitely not over it. The problem was that I didn't actually know how Sawyer felt, I didn't know if he liked me or if he just liked the physical stuff.

I watched him as he shrugged, seemingly unsure. "I don't think there's anything that needs to be said right now. Let's just see where things go and we'll cross that bridge when we get there."

I looked at him for a moment, taking in his words. I couldn't quite decipher them the way I wanted to. There's nothing that needs to be said. Does that mean we're on two completely different pages?

"Right," was all I could say back. I turned around, facing the coffee pot again. 

Let's just see where things go. 

What did that even mean? 

Last night they went pretty far. I immediately felt like I was going into this way over my head. It made me question what he wanted out of this. I didn't want to be used for sex, especially not by someone that I knew I cared deeply about. But I also knew how much I enjoyed everything about last night and there was a part of me that did want to see where things went. 

"I think I'm going to run out and grab us some breakfast. Wanna come with me?" He asked.

I shook my head, not turning around to face him. "No, you go ahead. I think I might call Larissa for a little bit. She wanted to hear about the wedding." It's not that I didn't want to go with him, but I also just needed a little bit of time to digest his words.

Sawyer spun me around so I was facing him again before he pulled me into a hug. "Did I upset you?" He asked.

I looked up at him and shook my head. "No." It wasn't a lie. It's not that I was necessarily upset, I was just confused.