Memory Fragments: Probity

As It Begins (I/X)

Just as I have collected every ounce of my power to redirect this world into a better one, so too have my comrades helped me in amassing it and combining it with their own. What little friendship and camaraderie was left of my former enemies, that too, helped give form to a power known as means. You know what they say, Edward. A means to an end, right? Well, what about a means to a beginning instead?

With your power, my way of doing things, and the collective of everyone else's fractions of wisdom and intuition, we can truly start anew in this wretched world. We can finally begin to heal what dastardly machinations happened on your account, and what foul mistakes we have made as living beings. Why? Because that is what we do as living entities. No matter what race or form or background we all might have, we can always count on the mistakes of others to help exemplify and correct the ways of others. Be it through learning, passing down an artifact or method, what relationships might leave in us, the change that occurs in all of us derived from our own actions and inactions, how all of that becomes a past we can proudly stand on top off and reach out to when we need a retrospective, the little disputes we have when choosing between our ideals and what is truthfully there in front of us, acknowledging that we are, indeed, alone at first, but the bonds we make negate those empty feelings and detached emotions that stir us in the wrong directions and, at last but not least, what little it amounts to, the weight of sacrifices that we make in order to succeed beyond what our shadows can cast our image. All of that, Edward. All of that might just mean crap to you, but not to me. Not anymore.

Power can lead to manipulation. But it can also lead to empowerment. It is true that you cannot spell it without the full word in between, but you can certainly say it without putting an emphasis on it. What drove you to become so obsessed with it? Wait, no. Power was not your only goal, right? Let me rephrase that. What drove you to seek out total manipulation by way of abuse in the power you already had? Was it your motto of perfectionism? Was the world not perfect enough for you? You were the perfect man, and teacher, I had ever known. And yet, what happened? Laying down in a fetal position right in front of me with flames raging just behind your back, what drove you to end up like this, Edward? Power cannot be it. I'm now sure of it.

Tell me, I beg of you. Tell me what it was, so I can never again search for it and end up like you. I'm, too, at the end of my journey. But not at the end of my life. I don't want to keep going without knowing first what to avoid. That way, I will find my own path to follow instead of being guided by your shadow. Will you remain silent the whole way through? Fine. Let me continue then.

Gabriela, Karan, Mery, Alice, Matthew, the Zoo people, Idios, Zanys, and all other forms and kinds of life here in Fanear are grateful to you, in a way. Without your conquest and relentless ways, we would have never faced the problems that plagued us from the beginning. We would have never found ourselves amidst others and, without that, we would have never found what little imperfections complement us. The sheer physical prowess, the peak intellect and cleverness, humbleness beyond measure while still retaining a sense of both self-care and respect, blah blah blah, you get it by now. I won't keep you here much longer. You are dying, just like you have always wanted. But you are not going to die alone anymore. Misery and regret shall accompany you into the afterlife. Oh, wait. You are eternal, right? A perfectly still embodiment of wrongness. Not evil, no. Just, wrongness. What is eternally wrong can never be set right. No matter how much you try, perfection is just a word to hide the wrongness in you.

...And so, while you burn in flames on the outside, inside you shall feel the fires of defeat fueled only by, well, your own oils. By all means, there will be means to achieve. As it begins, the beginning of means, so too does rightfulness.