Dance of Fate

Chapter Fifteen

The next day, I awoke to an empty house, as usual. Azriel hadn't slept over- both to my relief, and disappointment. I'd had to fight against the urge to ask him to stay last night, but it would have been cruel after what I had said to him.

I didn't regret making it clear to him that I only wanted sex. It wasn't true of course, but it was definitely for the better. Even if it had pained me more than I would ever admit to see the flicker of sadness in his eyes when I had said it. Azriel may not have known it, but he was better off not knowing me. Truly, knowing me.

I pushed the thoughts of Azriel out of my head and forced myself to get out of bed, ignoring the ache in my bones as I walked into the bathroom. I took a long time in the bath, considering I didn't have anything else to do today. Amren was busy, so we didn't have any lessons this entire week. It was a relief, but I was incredibly bored.

After I had scrubbed myself clean four times, and spent so much time in the bathtub that the water had turned cold, I lifted myself out and threw on a dull, light grey gown. I then grabbed a comb to brush through my wet hair- but the second I touched it, it turned to mist.

I cursed aloud, realizing that my power was indeed restlessly lurking under my skin. The Faebane had already worn off. I quickly rushed into the room and grabbed what seemed to be a box containing jewels- but upon coming in contact with my skin, the glamour was lifted to reveal the jar of Faebane. I didn't have anything to wash it down, but I could already feel the pounding beginning in my head, could already sense my magic beginning to rise up to the surface.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I poured a small handful of it down my throat. I almost couldn't swallow it, both at the horrific taste and the burning it caused. But I did, holding back the urge to retch.

Desperate to get the tase out of my mouth, I winnowed to the kitchen, only to find Rhysand already there.

"Rhys? I didn't realize you were back," I said, not holding back my smile. I hadn't seen him all week. Rhysand smiled at me, but it didn't reach his eyes. Which, I then noticed, were red around the edges. "What's wrong?" I asked softly.

Rhysand's smile dropped, and he shook his head. He ran a hand through his already messy hair, his voice trembling slightly as he spoke. "She's marrying him. Today." He whispered. I didn't think I had ever heard his voice sound so agonized, so defeated. I couldn't think of anything to say that might be comforting, so I wrapped my arms around him.

Rhysand hugged me back, so tightly I struggled to breathe, though I refused to say anythibg. I felt tears rolling down his face as he buried his head into my shoulder, his hands shaking. I held him as reassuringly as I could, so that he would know that even if there was nothing that could be done, I was here for him.

When we finally let go of each other, Rhys had stopped crying, though his eyes were still pained and distant. I then remembered he could see and feel Feyre down the bond. Was she walking down the aisle? Had they already been pronounced husband and wife? I couldn't bring myself to ask, so instead I opted for trying to distract him.

"Did you ever find out who sacked the temples?" I asked. I knew the answer- I knew they still had absolutely no clue, but I couldn't think of anything else to say. It wasn't the best distraction, considering the Court's temples being sacked was almost as bad as his mate marrying another man. I cursed myself in my head, wishing I was better at comforting people.

Rhys shook his head, but at least his eyes didn't look so far away anymore. No. Azriel was following a lead in the Court of Nightmares, but it didn't lead anywhere." He explained. The sound of his name evoked so many things in me that I could only pray Rhysand couldn't see them on my face.