Love & death-bill kaulitz

Sex toy

Bill's pov:

Scarlett looked down at her hand, covered in dried blood and the deep mark of my knife in the middle. She covered her mouth with her good hand and tears filled her eyes. She whimpered and cried as she fell to the floor on her knees, taking her hand with her down.

"I can't even move it anymore!" She cried out and held onto her wounded hand with the other one, trying to move it.

"What have you done?" I heard Taylor say behind me. I turned in shock. I didn't know she was there. Taylor looked down at Scarlett who was crumbled on the bathroom floor, holding onto her hand. Her eyes were filled with sadness and fear. And my heary gave in. For some reason I could deal with so much, but seeing Scarlett this broken over something I had done, was suddenly too much.
A single tear fell down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away hoping nobody saw.
I turned around and ran out of the hospital room and left Taylor with Scarlett.

"Fuck! Shit!" I loudly whispered to myself and banged my head on the wall.

"Dammit!" I shouted out loud and banged my fist into the same wall and I heard a crack. I looked at my knuckles and the wall. I had cracked my own hand open out of anger. I screamed out of anger for just a few seconds and then took a deep breath.

"Maybe there is something wrong with me." I said to myself and tried to fold out my hand. I put my shirt sleeve to the bloody wall and tried to wipe it away. I just made it worse.

"Fuck that." I said and walked away to the public bathroom. I stuck my hand under the stream of water and winced at the sudden sharp pain. Then I looked at myself in the mirror. My makeup was slightly smeared on the one eye where the tear had fallen. I fixed it the best I could and just kept looking.
It took me a few minutes to realize how Scarlett must see me. A monster. Everything I had doen to her in such a short amount of time. Is it still possible for her to love me?

Scarlett pov:

"I HATE HIM!!!" I shouted and threw a pillow into the ground with my good hand. I picked it up and smashed it back into the ground as hard as I could.

"I HATE HIM, I HATE HIM, I HATE HIM!" I shouted over and over to the beat of the pillow hitting the floor. Taylor just sat on the bed and washed me get all of my anger out and completely ruin my own voice.

"I'm only 19! How could he do this to me?!?" I shouted and cried and kept throwing the pillow.
"He's a monster! An actual monster! How can I still love him?!? WHY DO I STILL LOVE HIM!?! Tell me Taylor! Why the fuck do I still love him?!? Why is he so beautiful and dreamy and I can't get to have him?!?" I shouted at Taylor making her flinch a little. And then I fell to the floor again.

"Why me?" I cried out and burried my face in the same pillow. I heard Taylor get up and then felt her warm hand on my back.

"I know how you feel, I really do. But there really isn't much we can do. If you love Bill and you want to keep him, then your only choice is to do what he says and try not to care about all the pain. But, Scarlett, you need to get away. Now! You can't live like this and you know that!" Taylor said to me. She was completely right and I already knew that. I knew what I had to do, but for some reason I just couldn't do it.

"I can't run of Bill! I love him! Why do I still love him Taylor, why!?!" I cried again.
I felr broken and dead inside. No matter how much he hurt me, I still couldn't stop loving him. Not matter what he does, I will always love him. His beautiful dreamy eyes and perfect skin. His perfect body that I wanted to feel on top of me again. Even thought he raped me and stuck a knife through my hand, I wanted him to do it again. Just so I could feel his love.
Sure it's a fucked up kind of love and a kind of love that will and has hurt me so much, but I still wanted it. I craved it so much.

"I'm just... just... a fucking sex toy to him, and yet I still want him." I cried into Taylors arms.

"I know, I know. You know Tom did the same to me, or something similar. And yet, I still can't stop loving him. But I've gotten used to the pain by now, all I want is to feel him." Taylor said as she stroked my hair.

"What did he do?" I asked and looked up at her beautiful eyes and fiery hair.

"Stuck a knife in my wrist, and raped me. At the same time." She said and laughed a little. I didn't think it was funny. Not at all. None of this was funny. But we needed a way to cope with it all. So I laughed with her.

"See? My scar." She said and showed her wrist to me. There was a deep white line along her wrist that showed where Tom's knife had dug into her skin.
I took a hold of her arm and kissed her scar. Gently and carefully. And then I laid down in her lap and fell asleep out of exhaustion.
The last thing I felt before passing out on her lap being happiness. The small amount of happiness I felt after such dread and sorrow felt so much better than it normally would. And I knew then that all I needed was Taylor.
As long as I have Taylor, I can get through it.

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