Pain of love

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Taylor helped me get dry and fix my hair. It always dried so poofy so I needed to make it less poofy. With only one hand. Taylor washed the clothes I had borrowed from Tom and Britney and dried it with a hairdryer so I could put it on as quickly as possible. Of course she did that all in hand.
Meanwhile, I sat on the hospital bed with only a towel, staring into the thin air. Just thinking.
And while I was alone in the hospital room and Taylor washed my clothes, Tom came into my room. I didn't even notice he was there until he stood right in front of me and put a hand on my cheek.

"Bill did that?" He asked. I had forgotten that Bill slapped me. And it was visible of course. I nodded and enjoyed the feeling of his warm hand on my skin.
I nodded and looked up at him. I felt empty before he came in, and then suddenly I was back to normal again. I actually felt normal.

"Taylor still loves you, you know that?" I asked. I hated that Taylor felt like he didn't see her. She deserved better. I needed to know if he actually didn't see her or if he just didn'g care.

"I know, but I don't want her." Tom answered and looked at me warmly. A stare that somehow comforted me. He looked so much like Bill just, softer.

"Then tell me what you want." I said, looking into his brown eyes. Something about his face made me feel like he was the only person in the world other than me. Like nothing else mattered. He seemed so unrealisticly beautiful. Actually perfect. I couldn't find a single flaw on his face. And I just couldn't look away. I wanted to kiss him so bad. I wanted him close to me. His skin against mine.
Suddenly he leaned closer faster than I could react, and kissed me. He held onto my arm with one hand and the back of my head with the other. I whimpered in pain since he held onto my arm and he pulled away.

"Be careful damn!" I said and pointed at the arm he was holding. He took his hand away.

"Sorry, I forgot." He said and then kissed me once again. This time I was able to enjoy it. His hand on the back of my head and the other on my waist and his warm lips against mine. I got what I craved finally.
And I knew I shouldn't like it and I should have rejected him and told him to get out. I love Bill don't I?
But I just couldn't. Bill wasn't here while I needed him. But Tom was. Tom gave me what I craved when I craved it. I held him close to me trying not to think about Bill or Taylor.
He moved his lips to my jaw and slowly kissed further and further down my neck.

"Tom... we can't..." I said but I didn't stop him. We both new we shouldn't but we wanted to.

"Just don't tell anyone and I won't tell anyone, no one will know." He whispered against my neck and laid me down on the bed with my head on the pillow.
Even though both my arms and my face was in pain, I wanted to feel him as close to me as possible. I held my hands on his neck and the back of his head as he kept kissing me gently. The pain was horrible but I couldn't care less.

"How far do you want to go?" Tom asked and stopped kissing me to look into my eyes. Looking into his eyes made me want to do anything he asked me to, but the pain from what Bill did to me was still inside me, and I wanted Tom to get that out of me. The only way I could think of was re-do what Bill did and make it the right way.

"All the way." I said with confidence. Bill was my first time but it was forced, and I wanted Bill to be my actual first time but I knew that wouldn't happen. So I could have Tom. And I wanted Tom.

"Are you sure?" He asked but with a smile. I could see that he wanted to as well. I nodded.
He quickly jumped off the bed and went to lock the door to my room. Then he walked back to me and took off his shirt before he got on top of me.
I was completely gone at that point already. I didn't think about anything other than him. He was everything in that moment.
He took off the shirt that used to be Britney's and threw it on the floor. And when he went back down to kiss me, I could feel his body against mine. He was so warm and soft, I wantdd to pull him even closer.
Though I knew we shouldn't be doing what we were doing, there was no stopping it now. I needed to feel him and get what Bill did off of me once and for all. And I was so deeply focussed on just Tom that I didn't really care anymore if I should be doing it or not.
He kissed down my body all the way down to the shorts I borrowed from him and he took those off too.
And then he took his own pants off and looked at me to make sure I was still okay.
Bill's dick was big. Very big, but Tom's was bigger.

"Can that fit?" I asked. It sounded slightly funny and made me smile. Tom smiled too.

"I can go slow if you want?" He asked. I nodded and he went back on top of me and gave me a kiss before putting his dick inside me. Not even half and I gasped. He went on for a little while trying to get me used to the feeling. I could see that he needed to put more of it inside me so I allowed him to.
At first it felt like a big mistake. It hurt just like with Bill but hurt less and less the more he went on.

"Can I? Please." Tom said and grunted. I had just gotten used to a little over halfway, but I couldn't go on forever.

"Carefull." I whispered. He slowly put his whole dick inside me and I could clearly feel the difference betwen him and Bill. But with Bill, I didn't want him to. I wasn't horny or turned on and he was way too quick. Tom went slow and took time to get me used to it. And it felt so fucking good to feel him inside me.
His skin was getting warmer and so was mine. I looked up at his face and he looked down at me.

"Is it okay?" He asked and grunted a little again.

"Yeah." I said and accidently let a moan slip my lips. I had tried to hold it in so nobody would hear but it was really hard after a while.

"Ah, fuck~" Tom moaned and closed his eyes. He was breathing heavy and going faster and faster. And I couldn't stop the moans anymore. I never in my life orgasmed but I could feel it this time.
But before I could orgasm, Tom grunted and stopped thrusting.

"Please keep going." I begged and wrapped my legs around his lower back so he couldn't take it out. And then he started again just the same tempo as before.

"Fuck~" I moaned as I felt like I was getting closer. I pulled his head down to mine and pressed my lips to his to stop the moan as I orgasmed. And then he stopped and laid down on top of me.

"Jesus your heavy." I said and laughed a little. He kissed my neck gently.

"It's muscles baby." He said as a joke, making me laugh.

"Bill really did a good job when he chose you. I liked you from the start." Tom said and smiled.

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