Dear Heart | Yoongi

27

Yoora POV

By the time I'm arriving back to the house, I don't even have a clue how I'm still breathing, how I'm still conscious after the conversation with our manager. I want to rewind time, want to go back to before I agreed to that meeting, back to when I'd been so certain that Yoongi was wrong, back to when I'd been so certain that I was going to be fired. I don't even know what to do at this point, not really sure how to carry on. It would've been so much simpler if he would've just fired me...

The house is oddly silent when I walk in, pulling me from my thoughts, wondering just what exactly it is I'm going to be walking into as I hesitantly make my way towards the living room. It's an eerie feeling, a house that houses thirteen people in total being this silent with all of us inside it. It makes me nearly as uncomfortable as I'd been in the meeting with Sihyun, a notion that worries me as I finally enter into the living room. Everyone's heads snap in my direction, and I find myself freezing at the attention, trying to decipher what kind of mood everyone's in and why, trying to figure out what has everything so silent.

I find tear stains on Yoongi and Minnie's cheeks though, and it's a feeling that's severely unsettling. There's only one thing that comes to mind that would have the both of them in this state, taking careful note to the absence of my brother, only fueling that sole idea. It terrifies me enough to ensure I have no strength to pick my feet up, slowly looking around to take inventory of what everyone else's expressions are. They all appear heartbroken and disheartened though, horrifying me as I return my gaze to Minnie.

"What have you done?" I breathe out, though it comes off somewhat as a statement, feeling my breathing pick up all over again. Her cheeks are immediately flooded with more tears as she stands, and I find myself flinching when she does, not understanding what could've happened.

"Honey, you have to understand. It was an accident. Yoora, I didn't mean for it to happen." Minnie cries from where she's stood, and a gasp falls from my face at the name, feeling like I've just been smacked with its use.

"Yoora, I didn't mean to. I-I was too worried on Friday when Jungkook called us. I wasn't thinking. I was so afraid of what was happening to you, I didn't even think about the name I was using." Minnie sobs, and I watch as Jimin stands so that he can pull her into him, comforting her as she cries. My entire body burns and calms all at once, realizing that I hadn't even noticed the name she'd used when she picked me up from school that day. I should've known right then and there that I was fucked, and I was so out of it that it hardly even registered that she'd been speaking to me. I probably wouldn't have even responded to any other name.

My gaze snaps up when I catch motion in my peripheral again, Yoongi standing before slowly rounding the couch he'd been sat on so that he can make his way towards me. His motions are careful though, seeming to recognize how fucked I am mentally right now as he approaches, looking ready to halt at any moment. I don't even recognize the tears falling as I watch him with a heavy pout, waiting to see how far he'll go. Though, a thought comes to mind, and I find myself sighing as I purse my lips.

"You didn't tell them everything though. Did you?" I mutter, deciding that if they're going to know, that they might as well know the full of it. Minnie's silent for a moment, and my gaze flickers in her direction for only a second before it's returning to the man that's still heading my way. I catch the confusion on her sad face, but she's soon mumbling under her breath and I know she knows what I'm talking about.

"No. That didn't come up. It wasn't relevant." She breathes out. Yoongi doesn't even seem bothered by what we're discussing, doesn't seem to mind that he doesn't have a clue what as to we're talking about.

"Might as well finish it off. I can't even see properly. Not only did I kill my own mother, but I couldn't even be born right. I have monochromatic color blindness. I live in blacks, grays, and whites." I laugh sadly, hating just how fucked up I am.