chapter 12: genuine feelings

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The morning sunlight filtered through the curtains, casting soft shadows across Beomgyu's empty room

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The morning sunlight filtered through the curtains, casting soft shadows across Beomgyu's empty room. It was his day off, but with his mother working, he found himself alone for the entire day. The prospect of solitude filled him with a sense of unease, a nagging fear that lingered at the edges of his consciousness.

Beomgyu had never been comfortable with being alone. He dreaded the quiet moments, the absence of voices and laughter that left him feeling vulnerable and exposed. Whenever he was alone, his mind would inevitably wander to dark places, conjuring up worst-case scenarios and irrational fears.

He feared that he might start feeling unwell. He worried that something might happen to him while he was alone, with no one around to help or offer support. The mere thought sent a shiver down his spine, filling him with a sense of dread that he couldn't shake.

Beomgyu's thoughts drifted to Taehyun, his dear ex lover who had always been a source of comfort and support. In the past, whenever Beomgyu found himself alone and afraid, he would simply call Taehyun, and without hesitation, his boyfriend would come rushing to his side. Taehyun had a way of soothing Beomgyu's anxieties, of making him feel safe and loved even in the darkest of times.

But now, Taehyun was no longer there. He had left, his absence leaving a gaping hole in Beomgyu's life that seemed impossible to fill. Beomgyu missed him dearly, missed the warmth of his presence and the sound of his laughter. Without Taehyun by his side, Beomgyu felt adrift, as if he were navigating the stormy seas of life without a guiding star to lead him home.

The realization of Taehyun's absence only served to deepen Beomgyu's sense of loneliness and isolation. He longed for the familiar comfort of his company, for the reassuring embrace that always managed to chase away his fears. But now, there was only silence, a deafening silence that echoed in the empty spaces of his heart, reminding him of all that he had lost.

Beomgyu turned on the TV, hoping to drown out the deafening silence that enveloped him. He flipped through the channels mindlessly, searching for something to distract him from his overwhelming sense of loneliness. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't shake the feeling of emptiness that gnawed at his insides.

The voices and images flickering across the screen seemed distant and disconnected, unable to penetrate the thick fog of Beomgyu's melancholy. He watched the programs unfold before him with a detached sense of numbness, his mind drifting aimlessly as he struggled to find solace in the chaos of the outside world.

But even as he tried to lose himself in the mindless chatter of the TV, Beomgyu couldn't escape the crushing weight of his solitude. The empty house echoed with the hollow sound of his own heartbeat, a constant reminder of the emptiness that seemed to consume him from within.

With trembling fingers, Beomgyu picked up his phone and dialed Dr. Park's number, hoping that the familiar voice on the other end of the line would provide some comfort in his moment of despair. As the phone rang, Beomgyu's heart pounded in his chest, the anticipation of hearing Dr. Park's voice sending a surge of adrenaline coursing through his veins.

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