Straykids OS (Book)

'best friends' pt. 3

Ship: Jeonglix
Triggers/Warnings: toxic friendship?

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"You don't have to tell me, you have to tell Felix.." Minho said gently. 

Thanks to Jeongin and his friends, Felix quickly recovered. Chan, Minho and Seungmin asked him what he decided to do and the only thing he did was look at the three of them. He wasn't quite sure about his decision yet and thought about it for a few days and on this Wednesday afternoon he was sitting in his bed and the three boys were sitting around him. But before the three of them could open their mouths, Felix did it this time. 

"I ask you to at least listen to me this once, I'll try to keep it short so I don't waste your time even more. Why you're here is simple... I've thought for a long time about whether I'm doing the right thing or not and so I've come to the decision that I definitely want to end my friendship with the three of you. It's hard for me to do something like that because I thought that two of you were really my best friends, but that's how you can be wrong about people. 

In any case, with you Changbin, it's not difficult for me at all to end whatever that was between us, friendship or not. You didn't like me anyway. So congratulations! Now you have Hyunjin and Jisung to yourself. Now you can meet the two of them without me getting in your way. Congratulations! 

Hyunjin.. Jisung... why?.. Why did you make me feel comfortable and accepted with you only to betray me after? What happened? I don't understand it.. from such a close and real friendship it became this toxic thing.. And I'm tired of it.. I'm tired of always being the guilty one.. while I accept and understand everything, nothing comes from you except that I feel even worse and have even less energy to meet with you. I've had enough, I've been through this long enough, I've been treated like I'm nothing, but now it's my turn! 

You never listened to me, the topic was always changed and you were the focus again, in some situations I would have needed my best friends but nope, they would rather have something with a person who hates me for god knows what reason! I wanted to forgive you so much, I would have loved to forgive you, but nothing ever came from you, when you did something wrong, I never heard an apology from you, it always only came from me, even though I didn't do anything wrong. And now look at us, now we're sitting here having a conversation that I never thought would ever happen. Congratulations to you three, you have now achieved your goal. 

If you have nothing more to say, then I ask you to leave my room and Innies and my apartment. Thank you." Felix watched with glassy eyes as Hyunjin and Jisung left his room. When he heard the apartment door, he burst into tears. "And now I'm alone once again... that's nothing new anymore.." And then Jeongin and his friends came in. "Lixie.." Was all he said and then he took the blonde boy in his arms. "Shhh... you have made the right decision, okay? Nobody is mad at you for that, the three of them have themselves to blame for that." Felix, however, just cried in the arms of the four boys. "I'm not so sure if that was really the right decision... shouldn't I feel better? If so, then why do I feel like I did a whole crime?" 

The four of them hugged him a little more until he asked them to leave him alone. They left him alone because you could see how tired he was and how much energy it all took. Hyunjin and Jisung first went their separate ways with Changbin, they first had to come to terms with the fact that Felix had ended his friendship with them and that only because they were so stupid and didn't see how much Felix was suffering. They managed to scare one person away which was very close to their hearts and according to their feeling, they can no longer get Felix back, he seemed to have finally put an end to the whole thing. 

After that day, Felix tried to cheer himself up. Jeongin brought him along from time to time to the meetings with Chan, Minho and Seungmin, but Felix was silent most of the time and was lost in his thoughts. He apologized and then left the four of them alone at their meeting. Jeongin hated seeing Felix like that, but he didn't know what else to do to help Felix get back on his feet. Jeongin will continue to be there for him, no matter what. Maybe Felix will be ready to go to a meeting with him, Chan, Minho and Seungmin at some point, but it's still a bit early for now.