Straykids OS (Book)

Want me gone

Ship: Felix X Stray kids
Triggers/Warnings:  angsty, sad 

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It all started with a rumor that Felix didn't hear about, with a rumor that sooner or later ruins an entire friendship, band and the most important: trust and a loving relationship. It started when the staff members, stylists and all, either threw strange looks at Felix or treated him roughly, threw harsh words at him and much more. Felix didn't think anything of it at first until it got worse and worse. One day the worst thing was that he disappeared without a trace and they only saw him again when it was told that everyone can go home. He came back to the set with swollen and red eyes, cleaned himself off and changed his clothes in silence. 

None of his band members bothered to look at Felix for even a few seconds. That day, he had to drive home alone in the company van as the other seven all squeezed into the first van. The whole way he suppressed his tears that wanted to run down his wet cheeks again, but Felix didn't allow it. When he finally got to the dorm, he thanked the driver with a little difficulty and went to the elevator so he could finally go to his room and cry himself to sleep. 

After an eternity in the elevator, he was finally able to go to the dorm in question, he unlocked the door and made his way to his room as he was, he locked the door behind him, changed his clothes in silence and lay down in his room just where he finally let the tears flow. The next morning he was the first to wake up, he made himself something to eat, packed his sports bag and, after getting dressed, headed off to the entertainment. There he walked to the Pactice rooms, warmed up and practiced the latest dance for their comeback for an hour alone. 

Two and a half hours later, the door opened and the other seven came in the door with loud conversations. Felix took his things and walked away from the seven, not wanting to get into any trouble or anything. After the seven had warmed up, everyone got into position and a long and unpleasant dance practice began. When they finally took a break after hours, Felix went to his bag and drank his entire water bottle while he sank into his thoughts, while he looked around everywhere in the room except at the seven. But as much as he wanted to avoid them, Chan and Minho thwarted his plans. 

"Felix?" Chan's voice said, but Felix didn't react at first. Chan asked again until Minho tried his luck and after the second time, the younger boy finally responded. Before the two of them could say anything, Felix took over. "No matter what I did, I'm sorry. I will accept the consequences. My behavior wasn't right and I'm sorry for whatever happens next." Confused, the two oldest looked at each other, then at the other five and back at Felix. 

"Felix, what are you talking about? We just wanted to ask you if you're okay since you didn't eat with us yesterday and we didn't have you with us for breakfast this morning." Minho said softly, Felix simply nodded and ignored the other question and so they continued the dance practice. 

Weeks passed after this conversation, the comeback session began and everyone was stressed. Felix understood it, he really did, but he began to doubt everything and everyone. The last few weeks have really been hell for him, his seven boyfriends ignored him, were always complaining and blamed him for everything that went wrong. They excluded him from all the activities they did together... to put it briefly... they treated him like he was some piece of shit... like he didn't belong in his relationship... 

And as kind-hearted as Felix was, he let himself be treated like that. He convinced himself that his boyfriends where the way they were because of all the stress they had to endure. But he would soon realize that this attitude was a big mistake. 

After weeks of hard work, the eight boys had their first day off from their well-deserved two months break. Felix woke up and found that the others were already awake. Again he thought nothing of it and slipped out of his bed and made his way to the kitchen. Before he even had the chance to walk into the kitchen, he overheard a conversation between the seven that he 100% shouldn't have heard. 

"Felix is just annoying." He heard the voice that clearly belonged to his twin, Jisung, say. 

"You always have to look after him, he can't do anything alone." Seungmin said equally annoyed. 

"Lix, he... what is he actually doing here? What, what does he bring to this group?" followed Hyunjin's irritated voice. 

Tears gathered in his eyes with every word he heard, but he couldn't bring himself to walk away, not until he heard the last three statements from his three oldest boyfriends. 

"He always acts like a baby and it's just annoying!" He heard Changbin say. 

"Hold us back and not even be ashamed of it.." Minho sighed. 

"He should just.. go.." He heard Chan's voice, which broke him completely. You don't want him here? But why? What did he do then? He tried to do everything he could to always be a comfort to the seven of them and then he has to listen to how annoying he is, how he acts like an baby and should leave? 

As quietly as he could, he went back to his room to pack a bag, which he hid so that the others wouldn't see it, even though he was sure they wouldn't care. When that was done, he lay back in his bed and cried himself to sleep again with a heavy heart. The next time he opened his eyes it was in the middle of the night. He got up, walked to his desk and wrote a... a farewell letter to his soon-to-be ex-boyfriends. 

The whole time he was writing he tried to hold back his tears until he could write a proper letter. He put it in the envelope he had seen before, made his bed and laid it there. He changed his clothes, looked around his room one last time, until he quietly left said room and walked downstairs into the hallway, where he put on his shoes and jacket, took a cap and mask and set off to the airport.

The taxi he had called was already there when he left the building. Without taking a last look at the building, the taxi drove away, Felix wrote to his mom that he was coming and was already on his way to the airport, she didn't think anything of it and was happy to see her son again, not knowing, that he was going through hell at the moment. With one last message check, he turned off his phone completely and put it in his backpack and just enjoyed the flight to Australia. 

tbc.

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Part 2? Yes or no?

Tayla♡