If You Let Me

What Had It Come To

Today was the day of our trip. We got up at 2 in the morning, since we didn't want to be late and we were being extra cautious. All of us bathed and got ready for the airport. We said our goodbyes, and we headed for the airport. We started driving at 3am since we lived one and a half hours away from the airport. We had to go with two cars, since our luggage was a LOT, but we at least had Drei's car, since I fetched the others. Drei, Noelle and Isaac were driving with me, while the baggage and Jade were with Tyler.

We arrived at the airport at 4:50, the drive was relaxing, the roads were empty, so Tyler and I raced a few times. Seeing Drei's face when his car lost against mine, was priceless. There was a bit of tension between Drei and I, but we ignored it. I don't really know if Isaac and Noelle noticed it, but they didn't say anything, so... I guess they didn't? The airport was also still empty, we decide to run around the airport to gain some energy, and yes we done this at our big age.

We eventually settled down at made our way to McDonald's before we departed. Everything was starting to make me feel, okay. Not having to worry about my issues with my father or school, it made me feel like everything was going to be okay. I haven't spoken to my father since I left his house. My life felt, balanced. My mother has also been My best Friend through all of this. She's shown me what it feels like to be a human, not just some robot that my father expects to be perfect. Everyone is human, we make mistakes, but we need to learn from them, not be punished for something that's out of your control.

I was pulled out of my thoughts, by someone asking me a question, it was Isaac. "So Sky, where did you disappear to on the night of the sleepover?" He asks. I almost choked on my burger, I looked at Drei, and he looked at me, just as frightened. "He had to go home, he had some things to take care of." Tyler speaks from behind me. I suddenly remember that Tyler caught me and Drei redhanded.
"He asked me to tell you guys, but I forgot." He says winking at me. Thank God for Tyler.

It was time to board the airplane, it was fairly empty. I took my seat and waited for the plane to be crowded with people, but it never came. There were about 30 people on the plane. So My friends and I basically each had row to themselves. I was ecstatic, this means that I could sleep more comfortably on the plane. I needed it because i didnt sleep so well, after last nights events. My thoughts slowly consumed me as I started dozing off.

I was woken up by some turbulence. I woke up to see the famous volcanoes. We landed shortly after, and we went to go collect our baggage, at the terminal. We made our way out of the airport and headed over to the rental company, which was just outside the airport. We rented two cars, because of our luggage. We made our way over to the house we rented for the week.

We arrived at the house, and saying it was beautiful, would be an understatement. The house was on a mountain, overlooking the see. It was a modern home, with sleek lines,a black exterior, and windows all over. The house looked mesmerizing. The inside was just as beautiful. There were five rooms and six bathrooms, that means that two of us has to share a room. Jade and Isaac offered to share the room, and we all agreed.

After we all settled in, we decided that were going to go for a swim on the beach. The beach was just a walk from the mountain on which we were living. When we got there the beach was not full, I think this is a private beach, so once again, we were alone on the beach. The beach was stunning. It had crystal clear water, and beautiful white sand. The view was amazing. It had an amazing view of the sunset. We swam until the sun was just on the horizon.

I was sitting on the beach while the others were swimming. Noelle got out and joined me on the beach. We sat together, watching the sunset. "What are we?" Noelle asks suddenly. I was confused at the randomness of the question. "What do you mean?" I say as I turn to face her. "Like, what are we? Because I know that we are more than just friends, I mean what type of friends kiss one another, almost every chance they get?" She asks biting her lip. "I don't know? What do you think we are." I ask. "I mean I feel the chemistry between the two of us, but you haven't made a move yet." She states. "I didn't want you to think that I'm moving too fast, and freak you out." I say partly honest. I did really like Noelle, and yes I saw her as more than a friend, but I felt more attracted to that person. Once again it's a battle between my heart and my mind.

My heart is telling me that Drei is the right option and he will fill my life with all these things I lacked in my past. Yet my mind is telling me that Noelle is the right person for me, and she will be good to me and she won't hurt me like Drei did. It's honestly depressing because my mind is protecting me, and my heart is trying to fill the lack of affection that I needed. It's getting to me, because like I said, i can't be with two people at the same time. Although I don't know who to choose.

"You wouldn't freak me out." She giggles. I feel like I'm going to regret any decision I make, I simply can't choose between the two. "Noelle, I have something to tell you." I say honestly. Just as I was about to speak, the group runs towards us, and shake the water off on us. I laugh at their stupidity.

We eventually make our way back to the house to make something to eat. I made my famous Mac and cheese. I was listening to music while making the food while everyone was in the lounge. Suddenly I feel someone watching me. I turn around to see Drei staring at me. "What wrong ?" I ask confused by his presence. "When we're you planning on telling me?" He asks blankly. I looked at him confused. "Don't act dumb." He says slightly frustrated. I was also getting frustrated, because firstly, he comes in here demanding answers for God knows what, and now he's getting angry because I don't know what he's talking about.

"First of all, fix your tone when you speak to me. Second of all, you can't just barge I  here and demand answers for God knows what expecting me to smell what you're talking about." I say slightly raising my voice. He looks a bit dumbfounded at my tone, but quickly responds. " Oh, so you didn't know that you and Noelle were hooking up? I bet she would love to know what happened between us last night." He says, threatening me. "Who lied to you. Noelle and I never had sex, we've just been kissing every now and then. Secondly, once again you kissed me, not the other way around. And in any case, why do you care? You're the one who Fucked up our relationship. You kissed me and then you tried to blame it all on me, you told me that you arent even into guys, so why would you care so much" I say. I don't have the time for this bullshit?

Silence filled the room.

"Yeah I'm not into guys, I'm into you." He states. "Well you have a very unique way of showing that hey." I say sarcastically. Why was he doing this to me? Who told him about Noelle and I? And why is he suddenly so agitated?

"Are you two okay?" Jade asked as she was standing between us. "Yeah were fine, he was just gonna go sit down now, he gave tips for my recipe." I say, as I turn back to my pots. "That's not what it sounded like." Jade says. "Just leave it Jade, I'll fill you in later. I say.

They both leave, and I'm now left alone with my thoughts, I put my music in full blast, so that I can't hear my thoughts. The food was finally ready.

Dinner was tense, but okay. There was now tension between Drei and I. And Noelle and I. Fuck my life. We all decide to go to the sunken fire place next to the pool, and roast marshmallows. Personally, I didn't like roasted marshmallows, nor the smell of it. So I sat by the pool with my feet submerged in the water. I was looking at the sea, it was slightly visible due to the light from the moon.

I was deep in thought when everyone just started jumping in. I suddenly felt the cold water rush up my body, as I was now fully submerged. "Whoever pushed me in better sleep with one eye open." I state as I get out of the pool. I wasn't in the best of moods since my encounter with both Drei and Noelle. They both left me with a heavy heart. I decided that I might as well submerge my body in the water, since I was already submerging my thoughts.

The water felt nice against my skin, making me smile. It made me relax. It made my thoughts float away. It was just me and the water. Clearly not for long. "Hey babe." I hear Jade come up to me. "Hey" I say as I look towards Jade. "Wanna talk about it?" She asks sympathetically. I nod my head. I told Jade everything, once again.

"Jade I don't know what to do." I say as I pull my hair, out of frustration. "Well, just let it flow, your answer will slowly reveal itself. Okay?" She assures me. I nod my head in agreement. I'm so thankful for Having such friends in such a messed up Generation.

We made our way to the firepit, to dry ourselves. We all started conversing with one another. I decide to cuddle with Jade as some form of comfort. I looked between Noelle and Drei a few times, wondering what to do. No answer dared to reveal itself. So I was just left there in thought. What had my lovelife Come to?