New to Seattle

14. I will survive

6 weeks they kept me in that fucking psych ward. As soon as they allowed it Lexie would come by to visit me. She is quite sweet. I told the staff that I did not want Arizona to visit me. I was still very angry that she was one of the people who got me put in there in the first place. Lexie told me that she kept asking her how I was every time she knew Lexie had seen me. Lexie thought I should see that as she was sorry and she only did it because she cared. I couldn't see it that way. When I was discharged I did see her in the hallway but thankfully she was talking with what i'm guessing was a patient's parents. I had been back at work for a week and in that time I have successfully managed to completely avoid Arizona. I suppose it helped that we work in different departments. I mainly stayed on the Neuro wing as I wasn't yet completely cleared for surgery yet. Derek has the final say and so far he didn't think I was ready. He is allowing me to do pre-op and post-op scans. I was paged to a scan room by Derek and when I arrived him and Lexie were looking over some interesting looking scans.

Shell- is that conjoined twins?

Derek- yes it is. We have been asked to help with the surgery to separate them.

Shell- So, why have you paged me? I'm not completely cleared for surgery yet.

Derek- I know. I have to clear you remember. I think you are ready now and I would like you to accompany us.

Shell(excitedly)- seriously? you think I am ready?

Derek- I do, but first you two need to catch up fully on the case and get some practice in the skills lab. we fly out on Friday.

Shell- Excuse me? fly?

Derek- yes, it's easier for us to go to them. is that going to be a problem?

Shell(nervously)- nope... no problem.

Derek(leaving the room)- good. 

Lexie- is there a problem? you didn't sound too sure.

Shell- I fucking hate flying, but I really don't want to miss out on this surgery

Lexie- oh, Shell. you can sit beside me. you will be fine.

Shell- thanks Lex.

As we made our way to the skills lab, I heard my name being called.

Arizona- Dr Grey...

Shell(quietly)- shit.

Arizona- Dr Grey, can I have a word with you please?

Shell- I am kind of busy right now... ow!

Arizona(pulling me into a supply closet)- It will only take a second

Shell- what?

Arizona- how long are you planning on avoiding me?

Shell- as long as it takes. (going to leave)- now if you would...

Arizona(blocking the door)- no, I'm not done yet. I came back for you and all you have done is avoid me.

Shell- you put me in the psych ward, you expect me to be happy about that?

Arizona- when i found you, i thought you were dead. 

Shell- well, I wasn't.

Arizona- you tried to kill yourself and you expect me not to worry about you. you needed help.

Shell- you know what I needed, I needed you, my best friend, my person. i did not need to be shut away on some ward. Now I really need to get going I have work to do.

Arizona- Michelle, wait...

Shell- no, just leave me alone okay.

Arizona- we need to talk about this...