Shadow | Huang Renjun

10

"Whatcha doin'?"

Startled, Eunah slams her book shut with a loud bang, causing the librarian to shush her from across the library. She turns to see an amused Jeno leaning over her shoulder, reading through her notes, and visibly relaxes.

"Oh, it's just you..." she sighs, earning a fake frown from him.

"Rude. Anyway, how are you feeling?"
Jeno takes a seat beside her, handing over notebooks as she begins to pack away.

"I'm okay, I guess."

It's been a couple weeks since Eunah started properly hanging out with Miyeon, Donghyuck and Renjun, and she's slowly gaining Donghyuck's approval.
Or at least, she hopes so.
He seems to be doing whatever Miyeon asks, so she's not entirely sure of his actual thoughts.

Renjun isn't cooperating in the slightest. Every time she goes near the group, he either leaves or completely ignores her. Eunah doesn't mind that much, though. He could just be getting used to the idea of having her around, which can take time.

Either way, her progress is slow and in all honesty, very draining emotionally. The more she gets to know them, the heavier her guilt becomes. Regardless of whether or not she wants to please her friends, the fact still remains that she's using others for her own benefit.

"You don't look okay," Jeno hums, his soft gaze flicking from her face to the large book she's trying to stuff in her bag.

Pouting when it doesn't want to zip up, Eunah huffs and gives in.

"I dunno... I just– feel guilty, you know?"

"About what?"

She rests her chin on her hands, elbows on the table, and sighs.
"Everything...?"

Behind them, picking out a book from the art section, is a light-haired Demon. He pretends to browse, listening to their conversation with a suspicious frown on his face.

"Define 'everything'."

Eunah blows a stray piece of hair out of her face, eyeing Jeno with worried brows.
"Not everything everything, but just– mostly the way I'm barging in, you know?"

"Bar– what are you barging into?"

"Their lives. I mean– Yeon invited me to hang out with them, sure, but it's not hard to see that not everyone wants me there. I just kind of forced my way in, and... I'm not even contributing anything to the group. I just make them uncomfortable and stick out like a sore thumb."

Jeno places a gentle hand on her knee, understanding what she's trying to get at.

"Is this about–"

"Yeah..."

She presses her lips into a thin smile, flicking her eyes over to where she just spotted the back of Renjun walking past. Taking the hint, Jeno mouths an 'oh' and nods, trying to be inconspicuous.

She is genuinely serious about what she's said so far, but doesn't want to expose anything that could get them in trouble. No matter how much it pains her to keep it in.

"I hear what the other students say, and– well– their reputation wasn't great to begin with thanks to prejudice, but with me being there too... Now, everyone seems to think they 'turned' me or something."

"Yeah, I can see why that doesn't help..."
Jeno rubs the back of his neck with his free hand, grimacing awkwardly.

"I just– don't wanna upset or hurt anyone, you know?"

Renjun scoffs under his breath, internally scolding himself for thinking she had something interesting to say.

Of all the Angels, we have to tolerate the most obnoxiously pathetic one...