𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐐𝐮𝐞𝐞𝐧𝐬

Chapter 41

Two women laid on each of my sides, one had her arm over my stomach, and another was caressing my cheek. One was whispering softly about how much I mattered to them, and how they were always here for me. One was humming a song I was not familiar with, yet it felt oddly calming to hear. From their touches to their breaths hitting my face and my neck, they made their presences known.

I knew they were waiting for me to open my eyes, to look at them, and to talk to them, but I did not have the energy for any of those. I was too busy focusing on them so much, that I feared that if I opened my eyes, I'll start hearing and seeing my nightmare again. Right now, I did not feel protected, nor did I feel safe, but I felt free, for no traces of that wretched woman appeared.. for now.

What was I even doing? I wasn't hearing nor seeing Madrona and yet, my mind was still occupied with thoughts of her. Have I finally gone mad? I should have been thinking about my mates, my sister, my friends, and my people, but instead, I... I can never truly.. escape from her grasps. I wondered what she did to me.. and why my mind became more fucked up than ever.

Or was this actually Madrona's fault?

Or was it mine? After all, I was the unluckiest princess alive. To never be a candidate for the throne, to becoming lonely and depressed, to being blinded by lust and sex, to being neglected by her mate, to being mistreated by her other mate, and now, to being haunted by the woman who almost killed her, just what more was in store for me? Was everything my fault? Did I do something to anger the moon goddess? How much pain and suffering did she want me to endure? What if she was just waiting for me to die, so Gaia and Mallory could become a normal couple? What if she regretted giving Gaia two mates, thus she was trying to get rid of me?

Ah, I can never get a break. Just a month without anything happening to me was enough, but... I guess the world was too determined to make my life miserable. Perhaps I spent all of my luck on being born into the royal family and having two mates, and now, I had no more luck for the rest of my life. If I truly had no more luck to spend then I might as well end it all, because you can never live life without luck, never.

I wanted to ask the two beside me.. what would they feel if I were to disappear without a trace? If I were to leave a letter that said I took my own life and left them behind? Would they be sad? Would they be happy? What was I even thinking? Of course they'd be happy, they'd be rid of such a useless, pathetic, and ugly mate, they'd probably celebrate with all of the other countless women constantly fawning over them, and they'd deserve it.

They don't deserve this, a woman with no brain, no confidence, no knowledge, no looks, no nothing! I'm nothing, I don't deserve them. I should just end it all.

I'm sure my sister wouldn't miss me either, after all, I've never truly done anything for her. She was always the one looking after me, always protecting me, always finding ways to make me happy.. she didn't deserve such a useless sister. I relied on her so much that she must have been sick of me all along, she probably only hid it from me.

My friends? Did I truly even have friends? Perhaps Amethyst only entertained me out of pity.. oh, and I could never truly forget when Pearl rejected me.. and the other queens? They probably only talked to me because I was a princess, I'm sure they would never miss me. Harvy could do without me too, he already had his job at the academy, he didn't need me.

None of them needed me anymore. I had no place in their lives, therefore, I shouldn't try to force myself unto them. Perhaps I should find Madrona once more, and beg her to finally end me, to finish the job she started. That's right.. she started this mess, and she should end it.

I opened my eyes and sat up, ignoring the two who asked me questions, I wasn't even listening to them. I was about to stand up, but I found myself pinned on the bed with Mallory hovering over me. Her eyes looked straight into mine as she began whispering.